You're right. I should remind myself that if not dating is zero on the dating scale, there are yet infinite negative numbers.
Ogged is at zero! Hooray!
You know, if the Laimbeer thing had come up at a restaurant, I like to think that the staff and other patrons would have been happy to join me in a rousing round of "Laimbeer sucks!"
Does this guy deserve sympthy/ pity? Do you mean, from God?
Seriously, though, it's an interesting question. I suppose it depends what role we feel he has played in the formation of his character. As with many character defects, it's hard to imagine how this one -- he was on a date! -- could emerge without some willful blindness on the part of its possessor.
If I were appointed by the court to argue in his defense, I guess I would say that at least he was upfront about his habits (although there's definitely something to be said for keeping some things in the closet, at least during the first 30 seconds of a blind date).
Actually Megan says she "found out within the first 30 seconds that he's a gamer" which I took to mean he told her. Of course he could have been carrying a Monster's Manual or something with him, and that's how she found out.
Anyway I think his main problem isn't that he's a nerd but that he's an ass (at least according to Megan's description of the events of the evening).
Do you think Megan's mother is the one who set up this blind date? And ogged, obviously Megan is on the market, and the competition seems eminently beatable. Just don't bring up Dylan or Turlington too early in the relationship.
My jury is out, but, of course, that's because I don't know Megan.
I can think of eight million on-target, funny, ways to make fun of the first Star Trek movie, or any of the others, or any of the series. I can also think of a lot of offensive, stupid, ways to do it, that imply that anyone who would find anything at all entertaining about Star Trek is simply too hopeless and sad to be worth hanging with.
I have no idea which way she went, but the fact that she thinks it's sufficient to note that someone is, horrors, a gamer, is evidence that he "sucked," doesn't not persuade me to assume the best. (Note: I am not a gamer; a significant number of the most brilliant, and socially adept, people I know, however, are [yes, along with some jerks and twits].)
I didn't say "dating a blogger" (an action), I said "dating bloggers" (a group). Who could resist baiting the date into doing something bloggable? Not I.
Great for the audience, not so good for the dating.
Maybe he actually had to visit the john, and that seemed an opportune moment?
What I'd like to see is the gamer's account of the evening. It would be interesting to see if he could pull off an interesting piece of writing or just flame out. Maybe someone could ask megan to ask...?
I asked Terrence to give his commentary on the evening's events, he wrote back and said he is too busy polymorphing into the Dakmor Sorceress. Sorry, guys.
When I wrote that post, I didn't really intend to keep in touch with Terrence the Gamer, so hopefully you can understand why I won't ask him for his play-by-play of that evening's events.
I will let you know that he did email me for a second date, and I replied, stating while I think he's nice and attractive (a stretch, but why kick a man while he's down?) that I thought we had some major differences with our common interests and it would be best to pursue other people.
I half expected him to write me back and call me a bitch for going back on his (bribe) request for a second date, and half expected him to ask for $30 to cover my portion of the date. But he did neither---he wrote and just said that he agreed with my thoughts, wished me luck, and thanked me for taking the time to write him back.
Terrence the Gamer is still on the market, ladies! Just don't poke fun of Star Trek--the man is realllly touchy about it.
"I have to halfway disagree with Farber on this one: being a socially adept Trekkie or gamer involves willingness to laugh along with some predictable abuse."
Oh, absolutely.
But whether the abuse should be judged as fitting and intelligent, or as, say -- and I'm of course not speaking of Megan here, whom I don't know from a reversal of polarity in the quantum force field, but merely generally -- the sort of auto-anti-nerdism that in endemic to, and so attractive about, a typical American high school, is an entirely separate question from how good a sense of humor nerds may have about themselves.
"Tapping out of the date to cool off seems totally weird."
Yep, that sounds pretty dopey. But not having been there I'm in no position to judge either party, and I'm not. (Just jury and executioner, bwahaha. Okay, forget that last part.)
My recommendation is that Megan have all prospective dates fill out a questionaire, and we'll evaluate them in a comment thread here. Blog-matchmaking-by-public-debate: it's the future!
There is a good side to reflexive nerd abuse of the grade-school and high-school varieties.
For a significant number of people, particularly those who live their lives with their nose in a math textbook or the Dungeon Master's Guide, the conventions and mores of everyday life tend to seem like arbitrary and pointless rules designed specifically to screw with their heads, if not a sort of ritualistic stamping-out of all that is different.
And all that may even be true, but in order to properly function in mainstream society, one must realize the valuable lesson that different situations call for different behaviors, a lesson that is most effectively driven home by school bullies calling you a geekoid or a weenie or a fag when you e.g. act like an obnoxious know-it-all on the playground.
I was a pretty classic geek in my childhood: D D, computer games, books a-plenty, pedantic attitude, etc., and I'm frankly glad that because of that I was made to endure some nasty taunting and ostracism back in the day, because I learned a lot about the rewards and punishments that went along with being a part of the Group or not being a part of the Group. The only reason I have the social graces I do is because I had to be taught, slowly and painfully, that you can't always do what you want if you want to be accepted, and that social conventions are not just arbitrary barriers to intellectual freedom: they're also oftentimes a matter of courtesy to people you interact with. It's not society's anti-gamer prejudice that proscribes opening a date by talking for twenty minutes about random-encounter tables or dilithium crystals--it is, in fact, common courtesy to not discuss weird esoteric stuff with strangers who do not understand or care to understand said stuff.
After talking with Terrence mainly about Sci-Fi and gaming (two topics I could not find more dull) for three hours, plus the added discomfort of him still asking me if I wanted to go home with him (I had JUST met the guy) I think I could make a valid judgement if I wanted to ever see this person again or not. I chose not to.
hahahaha...what's up with Tron guy's ass in the initial set of pics? Thank god those lines he created on the lycra suit really cover up those flaw areas...
I can see it now..."and on the next Queer Eye for the Straight Guy: Tron man."
Hey, at least you weren't stuck having (and probably paying) for dinner with the Laimbeer girl . . .
Posted by Mitch Mills | Link to this comment | 07-12-04 5:22 PM
You're right. I should remind myself that if not dating is zero on the dating scale, there are yet infinite negative numbers.
Ogged is at zero! Hooray!
You know, if the Laimbeer thing had come up at a restaurant, I like to think that the staff and other patrons would have been happy to join me in a rousing round of "Laimbeer sucks!"
Posted by ogged | Link to this comment | 07-12-04 5:28 PM
I can't really talk about losers in dating disinterestedly, but come on folks, doesn't this guy deserve some pity, even sympathy?
Posted by ben wolfson | Link to this comment | 07-12-04 5:40 PM
Does this guy deserve sympthy/ pity? Do you mean, from God?
Seriously, though, it's an interesting question. I suppose it depends what role we feel he has played in the formation of his character. As with many character defects, it's hard to imagine how this one -- he was on a date! -- could emerge without some willful blindness on the part of its possessor.
Posted by baa | Link to this comment | 07-12-04 6:04 PM
If I were appointed by the court to argue in his defense, I guess I would say that at least he was upfront about his habits (although there's definitely something to be said for keeping some things in the closet, at least during the first 30 seconds of a blind date).
Actually Megan says she "found out within the first 30 seconds that he's a gamer" which I took to mean he told her. Of course he could have been carrying a Monster's Manual or something with him, and that's how she found out.
Anyway I think his main problem isn't that he's a nerd but that he's an ass (at least according to Megan's description of the events of the evening).
Do you think Megan's mother is the one who set up this blind date? And ogged, obviously Megan is on the market, and the competition seems eminently beatable. Just don't bring up Dylan or Turlington too early in the relationship.
Posted by Mitch Mills | Link to this comment | 07-12-04 6:44 PM
Dating bloggers; I'm sure that's a good idea.
Posted by ogged | Link to this comment | 07-12-04 6:50 PM
My jury is out, but, of course, that's because I don't know Megan.
I can think of eight million on-target, funny, ways to make fun of the first Star Trek movie, or any of the others, or any of the series. I can also think of a lot of offensive, stupid, ways to do it, that imply that anyone who would find anything at all entertaining about Star Trek is simply too hopeless and sad to be worth hanging with.
I have no idea which way she went, but the fact that she thinks it's sufficient to note that someone is, horrors, a gamer, is evidence that he "sucked," doesn't not persuade me to assume the best. (Note: I am not a gamer; a significant number of the most brilliant, and socially adept, people I know, however, are [yes, along with some jerks and twits].)
Posted by Gary Farber | Link to this comment | 07-12-04 9:03 PM
Even if he is willfully blind to his own character flaws—there's some pathos in that.
Posted by ben wolfson | Link to this comment | 07-12-04 10:19 PM
And ogged, what the hell—you won't date bloggers, but expect others to date you?
Posted by ben wolfson | Link to this comment | 07-12-04 10:23 PM
I didn't say "dating a blogger" (an action), I said "dating bloggers" (a group). Who could resist baiting the date into doing something bloggable? Not I.
Great for the audience, not so good for the dating.
Posted by ogged | Link to this comment | 07-12-04 10:28 PM
Ben W, you're appealing to the better angels of our nature. And what's worse, you're right! Thanks for spoiling our meanspirited fun...
Posted by Anonymous | Link to this comment | 07-13-04 5:33 AM
[redacted]
Posted by [redacted] | Link to this comment | 07-13-04 11:39 AM
Maybe he actually had to visit the john, and that seemed an opportune moment?
What I'd like to see is the gamer's account of the evening. It would be interesting to see if he could pull off an interesting piece of writing or just flame out. Maybe someone could ask megan to ask...?
Posted by AkiZ | Link to this comment | 07-13-04 2:51 PM
That's a great idea akiz. I left a comment at Megan's blog suggesting it.
Posted by ogged | Link to this comment | 07-13-04 3:06 PM
For the record, this is hilarious.
I asked Terrence to give his commentary on the evening's events, he wrote back and said he is too busy polymorphing into the Dakmor Sorceress. Sorry, guys.
Posted by Megan | Link to this comment | 07-13-04 4:48 PM
Ok, no, he didn't really say that.
When I wrote that post, I didn't really intend to keep in touch with Terrence the Gamer, so hopefully you can understand why I won't ask him for his play-by-play of that evening's events.
I will let you know that he did email me for a second date, and I replied, stating while I think he's nice and attractive (a stretch, but why kick a man while he's down?) that I thought we had some major differences with our common interests and it would be best to pursue other people.
I half expected him to write me back and call me a bitch for going back on his (bribe) request for a second date, and half expected him to ask for $30 to cover my portion of the date. But he did neither---he wrote and just said that he agreed with my thoughts, wished me luck, and thanked me for taking the time to write him back.
Terrence the Gamer is still on the market, ladies! Just don't poke fun of Star Trek--the man is realllly touchy about it.
Posted by Megan | Link to this comment | 07-13-04 4:56 PM
You know I have this sneaking suspicion that ogged is Terrence, and his post is just an elabeorate smokescreen to cover up that fact . . .
Posted by Mitch Mills | Link to this comment | 07-13-04 6:02 PM
Come on Megan, if you go out with me again, I'll even wear my Tron outfit.
Posted by ogged | Link to this comment | 07-13-04 6:07 PM
"I have to halfway disagree with Farber on this one: being a socially adept Trekkie or gamer involves willingness to laugh along with some predictable abuse."
Oh, absolutely.
But whether the abuse should be judged as fitting and intelligent, or as, say -- and I'm of course not speaking of Megan here, whom I don't know from a reversal of polarity in the quantum force field, but merely generally -- the sort of auto-anti-nerdism that in endemic to, and so attractive about, a typical American high school, is an entirely separate question from how good a sense of humor nerds may have about themselves.
"Tapping out of the date to cool off seems totally weird."
Yep, that sounds pretty dopey. But not having been there I'm in no position to judge either party, and I'm not. (Just jury and executioner, bwahaha. Okay, forget that last part.)
My recommendation is that Megan have all prospective dates fill out a questionaire, and we'll evaluate them in a comment thread here. Blog-matchmaking-by-public-debate: it's the future!
Posted by Gary Farber | Link to this comment | 07-13-04 6:51 PM
There is a good side to reflexive nerd abuse of the grade-school and high-school varieties.
For a significant number of people, particularly those who live their lives with their nose in a math textbook or the Dungeon Master's Guide, the conventions and mores of everyday life tend to seem like arbitrary and pointless rules designed specifically to screw with their heads, if not a sort of ritualistic stamping-out of all that is different.
And all that may even be true, but in order to properly function in mainstream society, one must realize the valuable lesson that different situations call for different behaviors, a lesson that is most effectively driven home by school bullies calling you a geekoid or a weenie or a fag when you e.g. act like an obnoxious know-it-all on the playground.
I was a pretty classic geek in my childhood: D D, computer games, books a-plenty, pedantic attitude, etc., and I'm frankly glad that because of that I was made to endure some nasty taunting and ostracism back in the day, because I learned a lot about the rewards and punishments that went along with being a part of the Group or not being a part of the Group. The only reason I have the social graces I do is because I had to be taught, slowly and painfully, that you can't always do what you want if you want to be accepted, and that social conventions are not just arbitrary barriers to intellectual freedom: they're also oftentimes a matter of courtesy to people you interact with. It's not society's anti-gamer prejudice that proscribes opening a date by talking for twenty minutes about random-encounter tables or dilithium crystals--it is, in fact, common courtesy to not discuss weird esoteric stuff with strangers who do not understand or care to understand said stuff.
Posted by sexualchocolate | Link to this comment | 07-13-04 8:10 PM
After talking with Terrence mainly about Sci-Fi and gaming (two topics I could not find more dull) for three hours, plus the added discomfort of him still asking me if I wanted to go home with him (I had JUST met the guy) I think I could make a valid judgement if I wanted to ever see this person again or not. I chose not to.
Posted by Megan | Link to this comment | 07-13-04 8:47 PM
Tron costume baby. What's a brother gotta do?
Posted by ogged | Link to this comment | 07-13-04 8:49 PM
hahahaha...what's up with Tron guy's ass in the initial set of pics? Thank god those lines he created on the lycra suit really cover up those flaw areas...
I can see it now..."and on the next Queer Eye for the Straight Guy: Tron man."
Posted by Megan | Link to this comment | 07-13-04 9:35 PM
So ogged, that suit shopping you were telling us about the other day . . . it was for a Star Trek suit, wasn't it?
Posted by Mitch Mill | Link to this comment | 07-14-04 7:53 AM
The Tron and Star Trek things are just more misdirection to distract you from Ogged's latest TV appearance.
Posted by apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-14-04 8:26 AM