You've made lots of friends in the last few years, Ogged. It's just that none of us (save... maybe two or three) would ever be able to pick you up at the airport without a sign.
You are a master socializer. You're entirely charming. The party wouldn't be the same without you.
Hey, she's seen you floundering in a speedo and she still invited you to her party. It seems like you can only go up from here - especially if you get some glitter pants.
I myself would go and then have a lousy time. But I urge you to go. My argument has the form of a dilemma. You will either have a good time or a lousy time. If the former, going is worthwhile. If the latter, you can write funny blog entries about it later, and hence going is worthwhile. QED.
Plus, what else are you going to do on Saturday night? "Cry, cry, masturbate, cry"? Blog? Even when I am home and am able to blog on Saturday nights, I usually don't do so because of the humiliation involved -- I assume you have the same strategy, so you can't even blog! And if you're not blogging, then you're useless to the world, so you might as well be hanging out with a: Swedish. Swimming. Instructor.
And what if she's, like, a little bit veering toward lesbianism, not that I indulge in those hurtful stereotypes? You love lesbians! Or maybe at least some of her friends are lesbians.
I rest my case, your honor.
Sorry it took me so long to comment, but I masturbated a lot when I was a kid.
If you don't go, I will come at you with a cyberfury not yet seen. I know fellow commenters will all be there with me. Call this an official warning to you ogged- go to the party, or the blogosphere will activate the Bat Signal.
Dude, go!
Posted by antonio | Link to this comment | 12- 9-04 12:28 AM
If you don't socialize, homeland security might come for you.
Posted by Michael | Link to this comment | 12- 9-04 3:48 AM
Go. GO!
You've made lots of friends in the last few years, Ogged. It's just that none of us (save... maybe two or three) would ever be able to pick you up at the airport without a sign.
You are a master socializer. You're entirely charming. The party wouldn't be the same without you.
Just make sure you eat first.
Posted by girl27 | Link to this comment | 12- 9-04 7:10 AM
Please. Go.
Posted by Claudia | Link to this comment | 12- 9-04 7:36 AM
Dude, go.
Posted by ben wolfson | Link to this comment | 12- 9-04 8:12 AM
Parties suck. Stay home.
Posted by baa | Link to this comment | 12- 9-04 8:28 AM
Go ogged! Maybe there will be other swedish olympic swim instructors there!
Besides, I'm sure she invited you anticipating you'd have a good time. This party's probably going to fit you perfectly. You're all but guaranteed it!
Posted by Andrew Cholakian | Link to this comment | 12- 9-04 8:56 AM
I dunno, maybe baa's right...
Posted by ogged | Link to this comment | 12- 9-04 9:01 AM
You should go, but you better get you some crystal-ass pants first.
Posted by apostropher | Link to this comment | 12- 9-04 9:11 AM
Hey, she's seen you floundering in a speedo and she still invited you to her party. It seems like you can only go up from here - especially if you get some glitter pants.
Posted by cw | Link to this comment | 12- 9-04 9:29 AM
Go, goddamn it, or I will hunt you down and kick your ass.
Don't listen to baa, ever, about anything.
Posted by bitchphd | Link to this comment | 12- 9-04 10:02 AM
I think baa was counting on such an interpretation, and actually wants ogged to go.
Posted by ben wolfson | Link to this comment | 12- 9-04 10:06 AM
I'll go if baa goes...
Posted by ogged | Link to this comment | 12- 9-04 10:07 AM
Por favorrrrr. Tienes que ir a la fiesta.
Si vale la pena. Vas a ver.
Posted by Balasubramani | Link to this comment | 12- 9-04 11:07 AM
I myself would go and then have a lousy time. But I urge you to go. My argument has the form of a dilemma. You will either have a good time or a lousy time. If the former, going is worthwhile. If the latter, you can write funny blog entries about it later, and hence going is worthwhile. QED.
Posted by FL | Link to this comment | 12- 9-04 11:33 AM
Dude, she's SWEDISH! Come the fuck on!
Plus, what else are you going to do on Saturday night? "Cry, cry, masturbate, cry"? Blog? Even when I am home and am able to blog on Saturday nights, I usually don't do so because of the humiliation involved -- I assume you have the same strategy, so you can't even blog! And if you're not blogging, then you're useless to the world, so you might as well be hanging out with a: Swedish. Swimming. Instructor.
And what if she's, like, a little bit veering toward lesbianism, not that I indulge in those hurtful stereotypes? You love lesbians! Or maybe at least some of her friends are lesbians.
I rest my case, your honor.
Sorry it took me so long to comment, but I masturbated a lot when I was a kid.
Posted by Adam Kotsko | Link to this comment | 12- 9-04 11:37 AM
If you don't go, I will come at you with a cyberfury not yet seen. I know fellow commenters will all be there with me. Call this an official warning to you ogged- go to the party, or the blogosphere will activate the Bat Signal.
(with apologies to 2slick)
Posted by Mitch Mills | Link to this comment | 12- 9-04 12:44 PM
It's completely sincere advice. You could be home reading David Copperfield and drinking scotch.
Posted by baa | Link to this comment | 12- 9-04 12:50 PM
what else are you going to do on Saturday night? "Cry, cry, masturbate, cry"?
I'm still laughing at that.
And I'm so glad that Fontana and baa aren't sycophantically falling over themselves to agree on this one.
Posted by ogged | Link to this comment | 12- 9-04 2:37 PM
Who says you have to stop crying?
Posted by baa | Link to this comment | 12- 9-04 2:40 PM