If FL and ogged ever meet, inevitably they will have chosen, independently and by cruel chance, to wear the same shirt. I am conditonally future-perfectly embarrassed for the both of you.
During the last few years, police have reported scores of robberies and thefts involving North Face jackets, which cost about $200 but can be more expensive.
"Superhere" underwear is underwear that has the superpower of being able to transport itself back to wherever this very sentence is uttered. Unfortunately they haven't figured out how to transport the wearer along with it. Or fortunately, depending on who was wearing it.
Some people, like Kriston, say "obv". Others, like Alameida, say "obvs". Someone should pay me to tease out the implications (for implications always want teasing out) sociological and linguistic of s-full versus s-less "obv".
Unfortunately, Ben, the free market provides for competition in every endeavor, and the competition on price is such that I'm willing to do it for free. The sociological and and linguistic implications of this phenomenon are as follows: Who cares?
A super-spy is deep under cover, so deep he's about to covert some hot, hot ops with the wife of his arch-nemesis. There's just one problem – what if she finds the name printed indelibly on the label of his undies?
He doesn't panic. He knows what to do.
"'Superhere' underwear is underwear that has the superpower of being able to transport itself back to wherever this very sentence is uttered", he utters – and his erstwhile briefs of betrayal are gone in flash.
The super-spy just needs a friend, maybe a co-blogger, to utter the sentence at the appropriate time. But we don't know whether the superhere underwear only answers to its rightful owner, or to anyone.
The underwear will indeed serve two masters. However, the two of them must "prime" the underwear by simultaneously inserting two legs, one from each person.
I've been trying to work up the mechanics of either
a) The super-spy has already uttered the appropriate phrase in the past, and merely willing that this be the moment for his underwear to loop back in time causes it to happen.
b) The super-spy, after deftly extracting himself from his arch-memesis' clutches in his subterannean torure chamber (perhaps cunningly concealed in an old Mineshaft), utters the magic phrase, instantly changing history, causing a paradox that destroy the universe.
doesn't that shirt make FL too hip to teach in the classroom? it seems there's a firm law against philosophy professors and fashion, however questionable.
You know, I think 18 demonstrates that we're looking at a case that continental philosophy handles better than analytic philosophy does. Anyway, I sort of had in mind that each particular piece of superhere underwear corresponds to one particular tokening of the sentence--so the first piece to be manufactured will, on an activation signal unknown, find itself in the East branch of the Milwaukee Public Library. For instance.
If FL and ogged ever meet, inevitably they will have chosen, independently and by cruel chance, to wear the same shirt. I am conditonally future-perfectly embarrassed for the both of you.
Posted by Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 8:20 AM
Official Shirt of Unfogged Commenters, Female
Posted by DominEditrix | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 8:23 AM
Ah, the cult of Hipster-Doofus; I remember it well.
Posted by SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 8:32 AM
Re DE's shirt: {Hangs head.}
Posted by Chopper | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 8:46 AM
Isn't that the new blog motto?
Posted by FL | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 9:09 AM
SB: Ogged only ever wears that shirt (in black), so Fontana can decide whether or not to embarass the both of them.
Posted by ben wolfson | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 9:18 AM
The North Face brand is a major inspiration for urban petty crime.
The North Face brand is the official brand of Unfogged.
Posted by Kriston | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 10:25 AM
Therefore Unfogged is a major inspiration for urban petty crime. What do I get for teasing out your implication?
Posted by Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 10:36 AM
The North Face brand is a major inspiration for urban petty crime.
Is this true? Like expensive sneakers?
Posted by ogged | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 10:36 AM
Only officially. Unofficially Unfogged is involved in several outreach programs.
Posted by ben wolfson | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 10:37 AM
It always wierds me out when Wolfson's intentionally funny.
Posted by SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 10:42 AM
but have you adopted the official superhere underwear yet, labs?
Posted by profgrrrrl | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 10:46 AM
Urban petty crime: yup.
Posted by Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 10:49 AM
Yeah, there are always reports about kids boosting North Face. At least around here. It was Jordans when I was a kid.
Posted by Kriston | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 10:50 AM
"Superhere" underwear is underwear that has the superpower of being able to transport itself back to wherever this very sentence is uttered. Unfortunately they haven't figured out how to transport the wearer along with it. Or fortunately, depending on who was wearing it.
Posted by Matt Weiner | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 10:50 AM
Therefore Unfogged is a major inspiration for urban petty crime. What do I get for teasing out your implication?
Nothing—you got it wrong. Unfogged are petty urban criminals, obv.
Posted by Kriston | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 10:52 AM
Some people, like Kriston, say "obv". Others, like Alameida, say "obvs". Someone should pay me to tease out the implications (for implications always want teasing out) sociological and linguistic of s-full versus s-less "obv".
Posted by ben wolfson | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 10:55 AM
My thought was that "superhere" underwear had a certain Heideggerian thrownness about them.
Posted by ac | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 11:04 AM
Unfortunately, Ben, the free market provides for competition in every endeavor, and the competition on price is such that I'm willing to do it for free. The sociological and and linguistic implications of this phenomenon are as follows: Who cares?
Pwn.
Posted by Chopper | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 11:05 AM
A super-spy is deep under cover, so deep he's about to covert some hot, hot ops with the wife of his arch-nemesis. There's just one problem – what if she finds the name printed indelibly on the label of his undies?
He doesn't panic. He knows what to do.
"'Superhere' underwear is underwear that has the superpower of being able to transport itself back to wherever this very sentence is uttered", he utters – and his erstwhile briefs of betrayal are gone in flash.
Posted by Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 11:07 AM
I am stupid. Someone else can point out why.
Posted by Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 11:10 AM
No, no. I think it's obvious, don't you?
Posted by Chopper | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 11:10 AM
I do very much like "erstwhile briefs of betrayal," though.
Posted by Chopper | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 11:11 AM
The super-spy just needs a friend, maybe a co-blogger, to utter the sentence at the appropriate time. But we don't know whether the superhere underwear only answers to its rightful owner, or to anyone.
Posted by ogged | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 11:15 AM
The underwear will indeed serve two masters. However, the two of them must "prime" the underwear by simultaneously inserting two legs, one from each person.
Posted by Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 11:21 AM
This fantasy now disturbs me. Back to tighty-whities!
Posted by ogged | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 11:23 AM
I've been trying to work up the mechanics of either
a) The super-spy has already uttered the appropriate phrase in the past, and merely willing that this be the moment for his underwear to loop back in time causes it to happen.
b) The super-spy, after deftly extracting himself from his arch-memesis' clutches in his subterannean torure chamber (perhaps cunningly concealed in an old Mineshaft), utters the magic phrase, instantly changing history, causing a paradox that destroy the universe.
Posted by Chopper | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 11:23 AM
doesn't that shirt make FL too hip to teach in the classroom? it seems there's a firm law against philosophy professors and fashion, however questionable.
Posted by Michael | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 11:52 AM
You know, I think 18 demonstrates that we're looking at a case that continental philosophy handles better than analytic philosophy does. Anyway, I sort of had in mind that each particular piece of superhere underwear corresponds to one particular tokening of the sentence--so the first piece to be manufactured will, on an activation signal unknown, find itself in the East branch of the Milwaukee Public Library. For instance.
Posted by Matt Weiner | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 12:34 PM
I actually would have thought that wearing superhere underwear would confer on the wearer protection from teleportation.
Posted by ben wolfson | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 12:35 PM
Deep front zip neck for ventilation during areorbic activity or warmer days
Or for showing off Labs' festoon of chest hair.
Posted by Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 12:42 PM
Oh my God, "areorbic" is in the original. That is awesome.
Posted by Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 12:49 PM
Areorbic activity, that's breastfeeding, right?
Posted by ben wolfson | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 12:55 PM
Areorbic activity refers to the lumpenproletariat's uprising.
Posted by Standpipe Bridgeplate | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 12:58 PM
I'd say 18 and 30 are not incompatible with one another.
Posted by ac | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 1:41 PM
Maybe superhere underwear prevents fallenness.
Posted by ben wolfson | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 1:44 PM
I am not certain that that is the term I want.
The term I want is "ropa vieja".
Posted by ben wolfson | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 1:47 PM
Or for showing off Labs' festoon of chest hair.
Wouldn't that be "superhairy" underwear?
Posted by DominEditrix | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 2:17 PM
I am so glad that a simple typo can create so much fun. But superhairy? Urgh.
And with that, I'm boarding a plane. Which means I'll be super-not-here.
Posted by profgrrrrl | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 2:48 PM
PG: There's always waxing.
Posted by DominEditrix | Link to this comment | 05-17-05 5:48 PM
I'm only putting this here so that the link to 39 actually goes to 39.
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Posted by ogged | Link to this comment | 05-27-05 10:11 PM