Re: Interesting Facts Of Office Life Of Which You Might Have Been Unaware

1

get that outfit and photoblog it.

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2

This album kicks ass. Mock it at your peril.

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3

Singing in the office, hmm. I think Ogg is in love.

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4

the dana carvey skit about tom jones is hi-fucking-larious.


he had a thing in his pants! it was moving. it actually sang a song! it was tom and his jones!

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5

Only if you would have sang to me, too. "Sex bomb, sex bomb ..." (saw that on endless video billboard loop in Vegas when he was performing there)

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6

A friend of a friend did lights for a Tom Jones concert in New Zealand. Apparently his retinue specially insructs the lighting people everywhere he appears to keep a diffuse spotlight on his crotch at all times.

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7

That is totally awesome. But I bet the logistics are a bear at restaurants. Tom Jones, going to the mens's room, ladies and gentlemen! Look at him go!

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8

Is that what it would have taken, PG? You mean it's in my interest to bring my real life personality more in line with ogged?

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9

Tom Jones, going to the mens's room, ladies and gentlemen! Look at him go!


When I saw Buddy Guy, he wandered through the crowd playing solos (extremely long wire plugging his guitar into the amp), including into the women's room.

I'm not going to speculate on what the apostrophe is there. Certainly not to suggest "menses room".

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10

Tom Jones, going to the mens's room, ladies and gentlemen! Look at him go!

When I saw Buddy Guy, he wandered through the crowd playing solos (extremely long wire plugging his guitar into the amp), including into the women's room.

I'm not going to speculate on what the apostrophe is there for. Certainly not to suggest "menses room".

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11

Crap.

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12

I chronically find myself setting bits of speech to melody. Though never to my knowledge a melody by Tom Jones.

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13

It's not un-u-su-al to sing songs 'bout any—

Rats.

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14

What's new Bridgeplate, whoooaaaoh-woh-woh-oh?

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15

Let me revise and extend my remarks. "Melody" isn't quite right – as often as not I end up with something improvised and recitativey on a really mundane subject like socks, or peeling potatoes. I bet this behavior correlates well with self-indulgent introspection.

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16

I do that too. And now I have to assume that Labs does as well.

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17

I thought 5 was a Flipper song.

(Since I post under my real name, it would be unwise to reveal my habit of altering the lyrics to any song that I'm singing so they refer to my cat.)

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18

Who's the black private cat who's the sex machine to all the chicks?

Fang!

(I miss that cat every day.)

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19

And now I have to assume that Labs does as well.

O Labs, Abu, O Fontanical Labs,

Your posting may dwindle but still we adore you.

Wont you sing us a comment

exquisitely lyrical?

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20

This is a warning. Wear that, just once, and your nickname becomes "Fez."

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21

Also 5, you mean "sung", not "sang".

OKTHXBYE

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22

You mean it's in my interest to bring my real life personality more in line with ogged?

What does that mean? On your PG date, you were who you are IRL? Or, at work, you assume the persona of ogged, and ogged is singer? Or you were ogged, and not X, on the PG date, and X is a singer?

I'm confused.

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23

This is as I expected. "more in line." IRL, less likely to make "sex bomb" jokes.

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24

IRL, more likely to stammer "So, uhhhhhh, wanna touch it?"

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25

Chopper does like to share.

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26

It was such a tender moment, our little time in The Mineshaft.

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27

At the mineshaft.

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28

Too slow I am.

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29

You'd think that a move towards "ogged" might be an obvious strategy. Ogged gets much flirt action here; you've still not reset the Tivo.

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30

I'll never overcome my natural prudishness. Lately, as my Tivo approaches 500, I'm thinking I should forget zero and just shoot for a thousand.

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31

I hear that when you hit 500, your sac drops off.

Or was that when you've been married that long?

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32

I think this is that "you'll never hit it if you're aiming for it" strategy; but the thing is, it doesn't work if you're aiming away from it in order to hit it. If you know what I mean.

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33

Did I mention that, since I use my real name, none of these things I say have anything whatsoever to do with personal experience?

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34

ogged, can you define "prudishness" in this sense? Is it a reluctance to have sex with someone you haven't been emotionally involved with, or an unwillingness to be emotionally vulnerable enought to achieve that involvement?

Not to pry, or anything.

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35

Not to pry, or anything.

No, not at all.

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36

The correct strategy, which circumvents the gotcha MW describes, is the Zaphod Beeblebrox Maneuvre.

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37

Yeah, well, what's the point of anonymity if you can't have strangers peer nakedly into your soul? I really am curious, though--I'd like to think that I have advice to offer, but it's dependant on the real source of the "prudishness" mentioned.

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38

ogged is, of course, free to say that he doesn't care to share, a more than reasonable response to some idiot getting too personal in a public forum. The social retardation I may have mentioned elsewhere sometimes makes it hard for me to tell when I've crossed a line.

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39

I was kidding, Chopper. I've asked TMI questions before, and always followed it with a formulation similar to, "Not to pry or anything." Personally, I'm betting that there's no "cause" to it that ogged can point to, and that it doesn't particularly bother ogged - I mean, he almost married into the Astor family fortune, after all.

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40

Re 36: Creating a second head?

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41

This belongs on the other thread, but may I suggest you write a script that's triggered by particular words ("head", "thrust", etc.) and immediately appends an "At the Mindshaft" comment just after the just-analyzed comment?

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42

Whoops! 36 contains Incomplete Anglophilic Orthography (IAO)!

What I meant, ac, as I'm sure you understood, was, either through hypnosis, brain-pinching, or some other technique, convincing yourself that you don't like $GIRL (or, in general, do not have sex as a priority), thus enabling you to be relaxed, not take direct aim at the target but neither purposefully aim away, and then! just at the moment when, if you were really uninterested, the opportunity would be lost forever, post-hypnotic suggestion kicks in, or your s3kr1t brane is unleashed, or whatnot, allowing you to fulfill the designs you never knew you had.

The ZBM was my favorite part of Hitchhiker's Guide by far and it was a great disappointment to me that it was left out of the movie.

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43

In highbrow-speak this is "How Apelles learned to paint foam."

(Yes, I had to look it up.)

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44

immediately appends an "At the Mindshaft" comment

I have begun doing this with fortune cookies.

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45

Re 42: Could not recall the details, but yes I did understand you, b. My favorite part of the series was the artificial universe he created to survive the Vortex thingy. I think of that all the time, in my ac-o-centric existence.

Re 43: Like dreaming the shape of benzene.

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46

This will be a test.

This is a test: 10,000 is a large number, larger than, for instance, 1503.

This has been a test.

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47

Interesting. Whatever filter is filtering stuff here only replaces zeroes with the letter 'o' when the zeroes occur between letters (maybe not just between—maybe merely preceding or succeeding suffices); when the zero is involved in the creation of a number, it is retained.

Oddly, other digits commonly used in l33+-speak are not substituted (eg in "s3kr1t" above). w00t.

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48

45: Or like Alice going to the, damn, what was it again? Top of the hill, I think.

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49

Top of the hill it is. I always liked the elephants.

47: They all look the same to me.

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50

What all look the same to you? If the characters between the 'w' and the 't' in "woot" look the same as the characters following the one and the comma in "10,000", then your font is at fault.

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51

Bad font!11!!!!! Actually, I don't care.

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52

You know who doesn't care is your mom.

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53

So, I'm just curious here: Wolfson, Weiner, did either of you get a lot of wedgies, purple nurples, etc., in high school?

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54

Aren't high schoolers a bit too old to do those things?

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55

Also, Wiener, total burn: your mom really doesn't care about 0 vs. 0. She's all about 1 vs. I, if you know what I'm saying.

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56

I bet Weiner reads the Internet in Comic Sans.

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57

100 vs I00

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58

eb: in the right setting, 40-year-olds aren't too old for that sort of thing.

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59

I read it in dingbats. Noone can know what I'm reading!!!1!!1

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60

What the hell are you guys all talking about? Nerds.

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61

Weiner: 43. Suck it, nerd.

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62

Also, Wolfson: did you time 42 to be comment 42? If so, brilliant.

[Yes, I realize that makes me just as much a nerd as everyone else.]

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63

Hey, look: chicken outfits!

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64

"It's something that you don't really need but everyone wants to have anyway"

I was just thinking how, though it isn't a necessity (like buttless chaps) I sure would like a small, plastic jumpsuit designed for a chicken.

Then my priest told me I couldn't have one.

Badum-ching!

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65

I'm always away when the comments are hopping. Too prudish to sing "sex bomb," is all I meant.

Chopper, Wolfson still gets lots of wedgies.

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66

It's not the same if you request them.

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67

bawkbawk chickens

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68

I thought by prudishness you meant your Jedi masterlike selflessness, always putting your homies' needs before your own.

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69

There is that, but I just call that my Jedi masterlike selflessness.

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70

ac, it occurs to me that you haven't wieghed in on the Honesty thread. Given the band in question...

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71

And now, upon review, I see that I was wrong. Dammit.

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