Re: Signs You Really Need To Eat Breakfast

1

Is it the breakfast, or the lack of coffee?

Back in college, I had a schedule with a really early class one day a week, and classes continuously without a break on that day untill around noon. I never managed to get up in time to have breakfast and still make it to class, so I'd skip breakfast. Every Thursday, like clockwork, I'd come home from class, run into my roommate (a nice girl, but a bit of a doormat -- didn't stand up for herself well) and rip into her because the way she was breathing annoyed me. Then I'd think "That was odd -- I like Schneider. Oh, it's Thursday," make a pot of coffee, drink two cups, and go apologize.

I have no idea why she put up with this.

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2

It's the remembering why you're acting like a crazy person that's amusing. Anyway, with me it's food, I'm not a coffee drinker.

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3

This is great -- I never knew if other people did that righteous indignation visualization thing.

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4

As a general rule, I figure that if I'm doing something, someone else is doing it even weirder.

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5

I have caught myself saying "fuck everybody" recently, and also have invisioned going from office to office in my building, opening the door, saying "fuck you," then slamming the door, and repeating.

And, even in a good mood, I hate having messages waiting for me when I arrive in the morning.

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6

My gf and I are both habitually moody, but simultaneously self-aware. We diffuse 99% of our fights by recognizing our own personal grumpiness as being unconnected to the other person.

I, for example, am a total dick in the morning. Which now just makes her laugh.

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7

I need the coffee too. Sometimes in the mornings, if I am feeling particularly unpleasant, I say to myself: "why you just need an exceptionally large amount of coffee today, Text," and order such from my friendly neighborhood barrista. But that doesn't tend to work to my advantage most of the time.

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8

I should say: even on bad mornings, I mostly just smile at everybody, and eat the anger.

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9

Alternate theory: you are all dicks. (I'm only halfway through the my needed 64 oz of coffee, myself.)

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10

I was thinking of ending #7 with: I am a dick. But then I thought, I do not need the negative reinforcement. And I am usually a pleasant fellow.

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11

And I should say that I'm generally pleasant to people. Caffeine withdrawal makes me mean as a snake, but I don't let it happen much.

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12

There's a reason I went into a career path that many days, allows me not to leave the house till about three hours after I wake up. (I'm working at home! Occasionally.)

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13

I have caught myself saying "fuck everybody" recently

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14

On really bad mornings, when someone bumps into me on the Metro, I'll spend the rest of the ride hurling mental lightning bolts at them.

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15

It figures apo would be the guy who actually provides a link to a cartoon I've photocopied a bunch of times.

And ogged, you should really worry when you start getting aisle rage every time you visit the supermarket. I got caught muttering, "Fucking dickhead, get out of the way!" when a fat man and his shopping cart were blocking three-quarters of the pasta aisle in my local Sainsburys. And the scary thing was that I didn't understand at first why he was giving me such a dirty look.

Fortunately, that happened the day before I went on vacation for two weeks.

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16

Some pollsters presented some data at the Prospect office not too long ago, some psychometric trait stuff. One of the dozens of traits on their list was "everyday rage." That seemed to define it pretty well.

My favorite recent example: A woman talking on her cellphone on the street dropped a dollar. Another woman (henceforth "the good samaritan") picked it up, caught up to the woman, and returned her dollar. The good samaritan then muttered to herself, "put down the fucking phone, you fucking fatass."

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17

oh, god help me, i love that. it could have been me.

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18

Someone was standing too close to me in an elevator this morning (I was on the back wall) and he had plenty of room to move towards the door. I was really tempted to slap him in the back of the head. I can handle having essentially no personal space bubble (I ride the subway), but not if the person in my bubble has other obvious options.

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19

I used to have sausages and eggs in the morning until I had the misfortune of seeing them made.

I also used to respect the law.

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20

join me on my homeward train sometime, wd. just walking to my customary end of the platform is enough to make me hate all humanity some days.

today was one of them.

but what's worse is people who look surprised that you want to get off a train or an elevator before they get on. a colleague of mine refers to such creatures as sheeple, and i think she's on to something.

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21

i've seen both being made, eb, and i still carry on. i must be made of sterner stuff than you.

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22

Must be your close contact with the famed British reserve.

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