Re: Chairman Mao Would Like A Word

1

Wait a minute...this post wasn't here before!

There's sorcery afoot...

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2

I submit, despite having never read anything more than the quoted bits here, that Sherry is a very difficult person to get along with.

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3

Didn't Mao have a little red dress?

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4

That's how it works with posts, Matt -- first they are not there, subsequently there are. When the opposite thing happens is a better time to be suspicious of the black arts.

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When I wrote that, the post was located in between "Grading awesomeness part I" and "Last dispatch from the outer reaches". All is no well with the world, though, The forces of light have triumphed.

And Mao was a well-dressed man.

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6

now well.

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7

not well.

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8

Why so blue?

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9

What'll I do?

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10

Spit in my shoe.

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11

Goo goo ga joob.

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12

That's how it works with posts, Matt -- first they are not there, subsequently there are.

First there is a comment, then there is no comment, then there is.

First there is a comment, then there is no comment, then there is.

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13

Someone once described a row of willow-trees planted at a little distance from one another thus: first there stood one tree, then none, then again one and then again none.

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14

I submit that Ogged doesn't object to fashion. He merely thinks he does, but he doesn't know what he is talking about.

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15

Someone described the traditional Italian class system thus:

The rich, then the servants of the rich, then the dogs of the rich, then nothing, then nothing, then nothing, then nothing.... and finally the peasants.

(Bread and Wine, Silone).

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16

Three cheers for Ogged, who curses fashion even if he doesn't know what he's saying. How we love the useful idiots who contribute so much to our grungy cause.

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17

I submit.

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18

Last night I was sitting, annoyed, on a bench in union station waiting for my companion to finish her Christmas shopping. I was watching people go by as I waited when, God help me, I began understanding Ogged's thing against high heels.

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19

It's just because a lot of people don't know how to wear them, and have little taste.

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20

High heels are a gross thing to do to one's feet, IMO. Nor do I understand why they're supposed to be sexy.

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21

b, nah, it's cause I was feeling really pissy and experienced a wave of frustrated anti-materialism and began thinking that women who wore more sensible shoes were more likely to have better ideas about what really makes life good, and that women with high heels were probably confused and looking in the wrong places for the good in life. I have no idea if this is what Ogged was thinking, but, as it's semi-crazy, I suspect not.

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22

as it's semi-crazy, I suspect not.

does not follow...

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23

High heels are a gross thing to do to one's feet, IMO. Nor do I understand why they're supposed to be sexy.

It's the poise, a.k.a. the milkshake.

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24

dude, michael, you are so wrong.

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25

I'm willing to allow the possibility that I have entirely the wrong ideas about what is important in life, but it has jack shit to do with wearing high heels.

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26

Hey, I already conceded it was semi-crazy, but, nonetheless, let me explain my mindset. As I said, I was aggravated, and watching people. And in a sort of mall. Malls rarely fail to depress me. As I was watching people, it seemed a lot of them were unhappy (or poor and bothering me for spare change*). And it just seemed at the time that happiness was rather a difficult and uncommon thing. And it seemed to be a thing that shared very little, if anything, with shopping. Shopping seemed to be a temporary distraction. And high heels, again, at that moment, seemed to be a particularly exemplary expression of this distraction.

I stopped thinking this way soon after leaving the Unioin Station mall. Yeah, I'm a regular barrel of mirth at shopping malls.

*I'm starting to think that DC is worse than Baton Rouge was in so far as being the receipient of begging goes. There's an awful lot of competition for spare change here, between the annoying beggers and the parking meters. It's almost a wonder that anyone ever has any.

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27

Is there an implication in 22 that the reverse is, in fact, more likely?

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28

Oh, well, malls are inherently depressing. And there is indeed something kind of depressing about people who dress up to go to the mall; it implies that they have few other occasions to dress up for.

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DC has the highest panhandlers per square mile of any city of I've visited, though I hear SF gives it pretty stiff competition. If you really want to be depressed by a mall, try Christmas shopping in the middle of a divorce.

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I remember going to DC after having been in the Bay Area for a while and thinking, wow, the panhandlers are so polite here.

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31

High heels are what make it possible for unskinny women (e.g. me) to look hot in miniskirts. They generally do great things for the line of the leg, but only if you can walk in them, you wear them with the right clothes, etc.

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Heels do make most women's calves look spectacular. That said, if I had to wear them, my ankles would already have more pins and rods in them than Evel Knievel.

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I hereby vouch for the high probability of Tia's hotness in miniskirts. Please do not find this creepy.

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34

For years I thought Fuck-me shoes were so called because the wearer was going "Fuck me! My feet are killing me!"

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High heels are all about the posture. I figure they serve the same function as men's ties - enhancing appearance at the expense of comfort.

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36

Labs, I appreciate the testimony, and I'll add for the benefit of the Unfogged community: Labs and Ogged are both smokin' hot, and it's a tragedy for all of us they are pseudonymous and cannot post extensive pictorials.

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37

Hear hear.

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38

Mocking the bloggers is strictly prohibited at Unfogged.

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39

Moi, mock? Sincere admiration, here.

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I am entirely earnest. Unless you are being falsely modest, in which case I say to you, "You're not that dreamy."

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41

oops, that was me.

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42

Well then, I'll thank you for the compliment, though I think you'll admit that "tragedy for all of us" would set off anyone's mocking detector.

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43

Okay, okay, "to all of our detriment" then.

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DC has the highest panhandlers per square mile of any city of I've visited

What, do people in D.C. give bums chronic instead of cash? If so, I'm relocating.

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45

What's not to get about heels? They make you taller. Taller commands more attention. Accordingly, when wearing heels, one is less likely to shuffle and more likely to stride, with the commanding "click click" that heels make. And they're not uncomfortable if they're good shoes, unless you're trying to go hiking in them or something.

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And they're not uncomfortable

Maybe not for you. I buy good shoes, but I've just given up on heels for any purpose other than going out on very special occasions. (And if I think I can get away with flats then, I do.) I've never found walking or standing in heels anything but a misery.

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My heels are uncomfortable, but that's because they're cheap. Often when wearing them I can imagine the minor modifications that would make them comfortable. Walking around in heels for the first time requires a little bit of new muscle development, but afterwards it's not difficult.

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48

You know, as long as we're on about accessories and looks, I'd like to point out that Ogged's goggle tan really isn't noticeable at all in this picture Wolfson sent me.

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