Re: The Zen Master--A Totally Earnest Basketball Post

1

I think you intended to title this post, "Zen and the Art of the Slam-Dunk" but got confused.

Meanwhile, a fellow on my desk just said "Festivus! -- c'mon, you know, Seinfeld?"

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2

Jeremy, you have a fellow on your desk?

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3

Indeed several.

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4

Maybe the dependent variable here is Kobe Bryant, not Phil Jackson. Just saying.

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5

Yes, Kobe is a uniquely evil person. No good coach can survive his corrupting influence.

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6

Mmm...but they won. By a lot. Not that 62-points-in-three-quarters is a plan for the season, but if that's how they win a game now and again, fine.

And 14-11 is "decent." Not stellar, not championship-caliber certainly, but decent.

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7

Your take on Kobe's electric night is horrible. Just inexcusably bad. Kobe's 62-in-3-quarters was a career-defining performance that will be remembered by Lakers fans for a long time. This had nothing to do with coaching. You would have preferred that a red-hot Kobe "do the right thing" and pass to... who exactly? This is the freaking NBA. This is Hollywood. Showtime. Nobody is paying to see the best player in the league, on the hottest night of his career, practice two-handed chest passes. Kobe is a ferocious talent, who for one night single-handedly destroyed the #2 team in the Western Conference. They were up by 30 points when he sat down at the end of the third quarter. And you're mad at Phil because Kobe was nailing jumpers and dunking on people instead of passing? Good God, are you like a 75-year-old white guy or something?

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8

Of course it's exciting, and insofar as I like an amazing performance, I was glad to see it. But, as a sign of how Jackson is coaching the team, it's pretty sad, because it's *not* an aberration: Kobe didn't actually shoot more than he normally does, he just made more, and shot a bunch of free throws.

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9

There is video at nba.com. It is pretty impressive of Kobe. When you can shoot 62-in-3-quarters why pass the ball to someone else. I would worry more about Dallas. I especially like when he runs into a sea of green jerseys by himself to the dismay of the announcers and then makes the shot.

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10

I dunno, when your star's hot, and his hotness is winning the game, you have him keep on taking the shots. That seems pretty elementary. The zero assists bit is a little off, but there's nothing wrong with that.

On the general point, Hollinger says that after a couple months of super ball-hoggery, Kobe's lowered his usage rate for December and that's corresponded to the Lakers winning more games. Seems to indicate to me that Jackson is, in fact, having a beneficial effect on the team, but that these things take time since it's a little hard to know what the optimal level of Kobe-hoggery.

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11

How would you compare this to Gilbert Arenas' "I'm not going to shoot at all for three quarters so there" performance(s)?

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12

more to the point: why does Kobe Bryant wear black tights under his shorts? Has he joined the nevernudes?

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13

They cut down on the flopping around. Much more comfortable that way.

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14

I don't mean compression shorts -- the tights run all the way down to his ankles.

oh.

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15

Kobe Bryant is such a horrible person that I can't even trust myself to evaluate his basketball performance at this point. My desire for him to lose/be humiliated/need to become Shaq's shoeshine boy simply obliterates my ability for objective assessment.

That said, Auerbach owns Jackson.

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16

you misspelled pwns.

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