And to bring this back to crying. The reason that my sister is in NC is that she broke down in tears in front of a Peace Corps person, and--since they knew that she'd been treated for depression n the past--they dismissed her for medical reasons.
This anecdote makes me, well, depressed. I hate that I have to lie all the time about my history of depression because if I were honest I'd be disqualified outright for tons of shit.
I was going to be a paid volunteer in an MDMA study, but got disqualified because they considered my reaction (three years earlier) to getting divorced and only seeing my son 50% of the week, a "depressive episode".
Women tend to suffer from 'atypical' depression more than men, but--if women are more likely to suffer from depression than men AND they tend to get atypical symptoms--how can that version ofdepression be the atypical variant?
Because, unfortunately, the typical research subject is a white college boy.
103: Totally serious. I've been paid good money to get high on Uncle Sam's stash. (linking to the cached copy because my hosting company is having issues)
1. I haven't cried since I was about 18 or so. Usually it was from self-pity when I did cry, unfair punishment or whatever. My parents were highly unsympathetic to crying. Never at funerals.
2. I do tear up sometimes for stupid heart-warming stuff, for example when reading children's books to my nieces or watching silly movies I didn't even want to watch. I feel stupid doing it. I also tear up when I'm laughing sometimes.
3. I think that the question of depression is a can of worms. There seem to be lots of types and intensities. I've never known how "clinical depression" is defined, either. Does that just mean "serious enough to need treatment" or "bad enough that it soesn't seem normal"?
I've been mildly depressed my whole life, but nothing like the black depressions I've heard about from others. On the other hand, I through go long periods of apathy, unable to start even simple projects like cleaning the garage, writing a few routine letters, or making a few phone calls, and I'm pretty sure this is a kind of depression. But I don't feel especially unhappy when in this state, just completely lacking in initiative.
And what I do then is post voluminously on the internet.
So if I fall silent, it will probably be a good thing. (For me, that is. Y'all will be heart-broken, I'm sure.)
I request a thread devoted to depression, in the hope that someone here might actually know something about the topic.
I've been mildly depressed my whole life, but nothing like the black depressions I've heard about from others.
I think that's called "dysphoria"--a chronic low-level depressive state.
On the other hand, I through go long periods of apathy, unable to start even simple projects like cleaning the garage, writing a few routine letters, or making a few phone calls, and I'm pretty sure this is a kind of depression. But I don't feel especially unhappy when in this state, just completely lacking in initiative.
Oh, and btw, John--the best book I've read about depression is "The Noonday Demon." It's part autobiography, hence long passages of what depression can be like, but largely good solid research aimed at a general audience. Both educational and a good read.
B, chronic low-grade depression is called dysthmyia. Dysphoria just means any really bad mood. It's the opposite of euphoria. It's generally used in the context of bipolar disorder when describing mixed states. DYsphoric Mania refers to agitated, high-energy black moods, sometimes violent ones.
You might like Kay Redfield Jamison's "An Unquiet Mind." She's an expert on manic-depressive illness who has it herself. She writes about her illness but also about the struggle to get tenure as a woman in the late 70's early 80's.
I have mainly only cried, as an adult, when someone died. That's pretty much the threshold for me. If someone I love dies, I will weep until I am numb.
That said, embarrassing but utterly true confession: I went to see Independence Day on opening weekend, absolutely stoned out of my gourd - like, really having difficulty interacting with the world I was just so wicked high - and I cried my eyes out at Bill Pullman's "this will be our Independence Day" speech. Reason #427 of Why I Stopped Doing Drugs. Nobody needs to live like that.
I think 'functional dysphoria menorrhea' may be the official 'diagnosis' when a sympathetic university OB/GYN wants your birth control pills to be covered by your health plan.
In general, books make me cry harder than movies, but there are a few that alway get to me - Joy Luck Club, last scene of The Color Purple. Lately I've started to get weepy over all the new hotel-related good deed commercials.
Secret shame: for years the preview to Angels in the Outfield would set me off (mind you, I've never seen the actual movie, but the preview was at the beginning of a VHS tape of some other movie). Finally, I realized that I was just susceptible to the unbelievably sappy music in the trailer - the soundtrack from Rudy (another movie I've never seen); after I figured this out it stopped the waterworks.
And to bring this back to crying. The reason that my sister is in NC is that she broke down in tears in front of a Peace Corps person, and--since they knew that she'd been treated for depression n the past--they dismissed her for medical reasons.
This anecdote makes me, well, depressed. I hate that I have to lie all the time about my history of depression because if I were honest I'd be disqualified outright for tons of shit.
Posted by hpela reggad | Link to this comment | 07-18-06 12:12 PM
I was going to be a paid volunteer in an MDMA study, but got disqualified because they considered my reaction (three years earlier) to getting divorced and only seeing my son 50% of the week, a "depressive episode".
Posted by apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-18-06 12:18 PM
Wait, are you serious, apo? You were going to participate in an MDMA study? and they were going to pay you money for that?
Posted by Bostoniangirl | Link to this comment | 07-18-06 12:47 PM
Women tend to suffer from 'atypical' depression more than men, but--if women are more likely to suffer from depression than men AND they tend to get atypical symptoms--how can that version ofdepression be the atypical variant?
Because, unfortunately, the typical research subject is a white college boy.
Posted by Cala | Link to this comment | 07-18-06 12:59 PM
103: Totally serious. I've been paid good money to get high on Uncle Sam's stash. (linking to the cached copy because my hosting company is having issues)
Posted by apostropher | Link to this comment | 07-18-06 1:04 PM
1. I haven't cried since I was about 18 or so. Usually it was from self-pity when I did cry, unfair punishment or whatever. My parents were highly unsympathetic to crying. Never at funerals.
2. I do tear up sometimes for stupid heart-warming stuff, for example when reading children's books to my nieces or watching silly movies I didn't even want to watch. I feel stupid doing it. I also tear up when I'm laughing sometimes.
3. I think that the question of depression is a can of worms. There seem to be lots of types and intensities. I've never known how "clinical depression" is defined, either. Does that just mean "serious enough to need treatment" or "bad enough that it soesn't seem normal"?
I've been mildly depressed my whole life, but nothing like the black depressions I've heard about from others. On the other hand, I through go long periods of apathy, unable to start even simple projects like cleaning the garage, writing a few routine letters, or making a few phone calls, and I'm pretty sure this is a kind of depression. But I don't feel especially unhappy when in this state, just completely lacking in initiative.
And what I do then is post voluminously on the internet.
So if I fall silent, it will probably be a good thing. (For me, that is. Y'all will be heart-broken, I'm sure.)
I request a thread devoted to depression, in the hope that someone here might actually know something about the topic.
Posted by John Emerson | Link to this comment | 07-18-06 5:52 PM
I've been mildly depressed my whole life, but nothing like the black depressions I've heard about from others.
I think that's called "dysphoria"--a chronic low-level depressive state.
On the other hand, I through go long periods of apathy, unable to start even simple projects like cleaning the garage, writing a few routine letters, or making a few phone calls, and I'm pretty sure this is a kind of depression. But I don't feel especially unhappy when in this state, just completely lacking in initiative.
Yeah, that's depression.
Posted by bitchphd | Link to this comment | 07-18-06 5:58 PM
Oh, and btw, John--the best book I've read about depression is "The Noonday Demon." It's part autobiography, hence long passages of what depression can be like, but largely good solid research aimed at a general audience. Both educational and a good read.
Posted by bitchphd | Link to this comment | 07-18-06 6:00 PM
William Styron's Darkness Visible struck me as recognizable, insofar as I recall.
Posted by Gary Farber | Link to this comment | 07-18-06 7:01 PM
B, chronic low-grade depression is called dysthmyia. Dysphoria just means any really bad mood. It's the opposite of euphoria. It's generally used in the context of bipolar disorder when describing mixed states. DYsphoric Mania refers to agitated, high-energy black moods, sometimes violent ones.
You might like Kay Redfield Jamison's "An Unquiet Mind." She's an expert on manic-depressive illness who has it herself. She writes about her illness but also about the struggle to get tenure as a woman in the late 70's early 80's.
Posted by Bostoniangirl | Link to this comment | 07-18-06 8:02 PM
I have mainly only cried, as an adult, when someone died. That's pretty much the threshold for me. If someone I love dies, I will weep until I am numb.
That said, embarrassing but utterly true confession: I went to see Independence Day on opening weekend, absolutely stoned out of my gourd - like, really having difficulty interacting with the world I was just so wicked high - and I cried my eyes out at Bill Pullman's "this will be our Independence Day" speech. Reason #427 of Why I Stopped Doing Drugs. Nobody needs to live like that.
Posted by Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 07-18-06 8:02 PM
I think 'functional dysphoria menorrhea' may be the official 'diagnosis' when a sympathetic university OB/GYN wants your birth control pills to be covered by your health plan.
Posted by Cala | Link to this comment | 07-18-06 8:21 PM
Dysthmyia, right.
Posted by bitchphd | Link to this comment | 07-18-06 8:45 PM
"She writes about her illness but also about the struggle to get tenure as a woman in the late 70's early 80's."
I was once on a tenure track to be a man, but now I just have temporary positions.
Posted by Gary Farber | Link to this comment | 07-18-06 8:51 PM
Something to not be depressed about: Ralph Reed may be losing his primary election. Though it's early returns as yet.
Posted by Gary Farber | Link to this comment | 07-18-06 9:12 PM
In general, books make me cry harder than movies, but there are a few that alway get to me - Joy Luck Club, last scene of The Color Purple. Lately I've started to get weepy over all the new hotel-related good deed commercials.
Secret shame: for years the preview to Angels in the Outfield would set me off (mind you, I've never seen the actual movie, but the preview was at the beginning of a VHS tape of some other movie). Finally, I realized that I was just susceptible to the unbelievably sappy music in the trailer - the soundtrack from Rudy (another movie I've never seen); after I figured this out it stopped the waterworks.
Posted by plain | Link to this comment | 07-21-06 8:38 AM