1: No. But that made me chuckle, you fiend.
Huh.
Somewhere I have a photo of a friend sprawled dramatically on his kitchen floor next to the wide splash of what had obviously been a gigantic pot of veggie chili -- intended for a pot luck he was hosting mere moments later. Oh, shit.
We need a picture of the potted plant dumped in the dinner, Stanley.
3.last: Then you'd mock me for what I had "prepared" for dinner. In any case, a photo seems not to be in the cards, as my camera's acting flaky and my cell-phone-picture attempt came out indecipherable. You'll just have to use your imagination.
I poured roti canai sauce all over my living room floor at dinner tonight, as well. Maybe we need to wedge a folded piece of paper under the corner of the universe so it's level again.
That isn't how you make pot brownies Stonely.
There is no mocking going on here. I'm not sure why you were messing with the potted plant on the kitchen counter or whatever, but hey, these things happen from time to time. Mostly it's that dumbfounded moment after the incident where you just go: huh. Wow. Look at that.
It's not like you can do anything about it at that point. I feel that this is a revelatory moment.
I feel that this is a revelatory moment.
A commenter said to Stanley, "Your cooking is widely renowned, but your dinner is risible."
Stanley said, "You think only of the food and not its presentation."
The commenter said, "What is the presentation?"
Stanley knocked a potted plant into the food.
Awww, my sympathy. Kitchen fail happens to the best of us. Solution: order pizza!
Used to work w/ a (medical) mycologist and a coworker told her tale of woe of kitchen fail while camping (while draining, inadvertently dumped pasta on ground, then scooped it up, tossed into sauce and ate) and the mycologist was horrified - how many diseases she could have gotten - but my coworker's response: we had hiked all day, we were hungry, it was fine.
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Funny, stupid band name I overheard tonight being proposed for a country-rock project: "The Dixie Swallows".
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Too regional, maybe "The Dixie Yanks".
11, 12: Too subtle. How about "The Dixie Performs Fellatio Upon"? Catchy, huh???
I think "Cunty Fingers" would be a good band name.
Maybe an all-girl Crooked Fingers cover band?
13: How about "Dick Late-night Commenter"?
"The Dixie Upon Which Fellatio," M/tch.
I was just thinking of you for some reason, neb.
14: Given the Irish butler provenance, I think Stiff Little Fingers is more suited.
The Unfogged semi-private chat room was perhaps the most awkward place I've ever been on the internet. Ah, memories.
14 'Digital penetration' was a felony when and where I went to college, along with pretty much every possible sexual act other than hetero missionary.
And I rather think that "Dixie Upon Which Fellatio" would make a lovely band name. It would suit an arty trip-hop country group very nicely.
24: "The band is just fantastic, that is really what I think, oh by the way, which one's Dixie?"
Maybe the band would have like one explicitly political song, to keep the fans guessing and to get them denounced by all the right people.
14 'Digital penetration' was a felony when and where I went to college
Would it be violating the analogy ban to suggest that analog penetration is clearly superior to digital?
Clearly my jokes are even lamer than usual when I'm this tired.
My initials are WTF. I have been unsuccessful in my attempts to get any women to tattoo my initials on their body.
We had a tragic Internet accident today when the girls asked me to do a google image search on 'unicorns and rainbows' and one of the scenes was just that, with "white power" written in a nearby cloud, tattooed on some dude's right ass cheek.
We had a tragic Internet accident today when the girls asked me to do a google image search on 'unicorns and rainbows' and one of the scenes was just that, with "white power" written in a nearby cloud, tattooed on some dude's right ass cheek.
You should have known better the second time around.