Because they trolled all of Japan to find the girl training to be a geisha and all of Kentucky to find exposed insulation?
I guess ham-fisted and crudely stereotyped would about cover it.
Yeah, yeah, but it would be pretty sweet to see 7-year-old-Indira and 11-year-old-Joey take out 9 year old Jamie.
I'd bet 8-year-old Ahkohxet could easily take out Jamie, too.
The photos are lovely, but this one--14-year-old Irkena is a member of the semi-nomadic Rendille tribe in Kenya and lives with his mother in a temporary homestead in the Kaisut Desert--literally shows a stool in a savanna. I assume Irkena doesn't sleep on a stool? I don't get it.
(Also, obviously, the captions are totally moralizing.)
Why were the American kids totally unarmed when the Third World kids got axes and shit?
Privileged children sleep like this ...
DOES THIS GUN LOOK LIKE A FUCKING STUFFED ANIMAL TO YOU, MOBY?
Because they trolled all of Japan to find the girlboy training to be a geishasumo wrestler?
Although his resemblance to Russell from Up is sort of endearing.
5: I dunno -- that hunter kid could totally take out the ax kid and the hammer kid.
Although his resemblance to Russell from Up is sort of endearing.
ZOMG. That is exactly right.
7, 8, 9: The page also loaded slowly so I commented before seeing all the pictures.
Camo-boy being described as a deer hunter is strange since he is clearly not dressed for hunting deer. He probably also hunts turkey.
Also, the rich parents seem to have been carefully selected for no-taste-whatsoever. Even fifth avenue "top-floor" Jamie has a room that has been shot (and photoshopped) to seem "barren" and "soulless."
Quick bleg: Need a good bike shop in the Boston area that sells kids' sizes?
I have a bow, but no arrows. I should probably go to Cabella's or something.
Camo-boy being described as a deer hunter is strange
Your blatant attempt to flaunt your hunter cred is for naught since he is nowhere described as such. It merely says, who killed his first deer when he was seven. Perhaps you are overtired.
Like he hit the deer in a car he was driving?
Here is the definitive ranking of which kid beats up which kid, from best to worst. I'm thinking they can use the weapons shown in the photos, if not the rankings change slightly:
Joey (firepower alone)
Irkena
Lamine
Indira
Ahkohxet
Dong
Ryuta
Alyssa
Justin
Prena
Risa
Tsvika
Romanian Boy
Justin
Jasmine
(Erien, NA, pregnant)
Tsvika surely has more firepower in his house than any of them.
Is "render soulless" a photoshop filter?
Anyway, I've never hunted deer. I have gone quail hunting while wearing enough orange to pass for the ass of a Hooter's waitress because I was afraid of being shoot by a deer hunter.
Like he hit the deer in a car he was driving?
When his front porch collapsed. Wait, that's some other "d" animal.
Wow, that is some kind of record for offensiveness in a single photo essay. I couldn't even make it all the way through. "Neutral" backgrounds my left pinkie.
I have gone quail hunting while wearing enough orange to pass for the ass of a Hooter's waitress
That was on a Sunday between cheering for the Vols on Saturday and picking up trash on the highway on Monday.
I'm Catholic Irish raised in a town started by a Finean. Wearing orange doesn't seem natural unless it's somehow going to help me stay alive.
I'm Catholic Irish raised in a town started by a Finean.
So how would you do in my "kids fight other kids to determine the toughest ethnicity" reality show?
29: Not very well. There were very few people of other ethnicities around so it wasn't a thing.
We couldn't even count very well we were so isolated.
You could move to Salt Lake and hang with The Great Brain.
Because they did not publish the addresses?
4: All we really know about Irkena is that he's never seen a violin. Well, except that once.
Ok I guess I will actually go follow the link now.
Oh, Alas. Oh, Kentucky. Also what's this with suddenly identifying only "Appalachia." Isn't that the state they live in in Pale Fire? Also I know children are all beautiful and stuff only some of these just really aren't.
Is "render soulless" a photoshop filter?
With the desaturate colors knob and the wide-angle lens, it certainly seems to be a visual convention.
fuck can someone tell me how to point my linux reinstall to my /dev/sdb3/ /media/unity/yoyo/ home folder from my previous install?
"Appalachia." Isn't that the state they live in in Pale Fire?
Yes, Wordsmith College, New Wye , Appalachia. Standing in primarily for Cornell University, Ithaca, New Wye (not the most "Appalachia" locale although I am sure it brings along some multi-layered allusions). Such as Wordsworth associated with the River Wye and Kinbote living in Goldsworth's house and on and on.
35: All we really know about Irkena is that he's never seen a violin. Well, except that once.
Nice. Not sure about the audience but at least that violin concert brought great joy to one group of people in the world.
I'm Catholic Irish raised in a town started by a Finean.
Or perhaps started by a Fenian? (Not that I'd know anything about that, of course.)
I distrust photo essays of children and childhood, because they tend to be both overly precious and emotionally manipulative.
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To lighten the mood: Wikipedia's lamest edit wars.
Yes, it's a year old. Still pretty funny.
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not the most "Appalachia" locale
Nor the least; the area around Ithaca is pretty solidly northern Appalachia, and it looks very similar to other Appalachian areas.
Reading the thread, 36 had me all excited about giving a detailed description of New Wye and so on, and then JP had to go and ruin my fun.
JP had to go and ruin my fun.
Yeah, he'll do that.
Anyway, if they're going to include a photo from Appalachia, they should also have one from Utana.
Also what's this with suddenly identifying only "Appalachia." Isn't that the state they live in in Pale Fire?
Yes, and it shouldn't be used in any other context. It's an Appalachian controlée.
(This joke stolen from dsquared; I no longer fear his wrath, having looted a war owl of my own from TK Maxx last night.)
re: 37
Yes, there's the 'stand really close but use a wide angle lens' convention in 'art' photography/environmental portraiture. Often accompanied by increased rather than reduced saturation, for extra uglification.
18: I would guess that a Romanian street urchin is going to have way more fight in him than this placement would indicate. Unless he's starving (which he doesn't look). I'd move him at least above Alyssa, possibly above Dong. Otherwise, well done.
14- Wheelworks in Belmont used to have a store around the corner that was specifically kids bikes, not sure if that's still there but even so the main store has kids bikes too.
You know wha-- uh-oh.
Hey, Mom! I pooped! Can you bring me new pajamas?
having looted a war owl of my own from TK Maxx last night.
Some of those discount war owls are not very discount war owls are not very dependable.
Oh yeah, and some wet wipes! Definitely wet wipes!
You know Appalachia just means yet more Kentucky but they didn't want the state to look overrepresented.
Look out, Mama, there's a white boat comin' up the river
With a big red beacon, and a flag,and a man with a lens
43: Nor the least; the area around Ithaca is pretty solidly northern Appalachia
Yes, not Appalachia Classic, but having had occasion to explore some of the more backwater parts of the Southern Tier over the past few years I will admit I was somewhat surprised by its overall character. I was perhaps deceived by the classical names of the Central New York Military Tract and surrounding areas.
Were Texas Hots a cuisine feature in and around Ithaca?
44: The only geographically discordant note on New Wye being Ithaca is that when Gradus is having trouble finding transport from New York an alternative to the slow train to Exton* (industrial city on the south shore of Omega Lake) is to "cheat" by going to Washington and taking a "slow local".
*"From Exe to Wye on days of special frost."
Ithaca is definitely geographically in Appalachia. Culturally, it's more complicated. While there are certainly hardcore hicks around the region, complete with jacked up cars et al., I think there is a difference between "Northern" and "Southern" hicks, with the former being descendants of New England Yankees and the latter descendants of Scoth-Irish or other "Butternuts.". It's rare to see confederate flags for example, which (in the 1990s at least) wasn't the case in rural Pennsylvania. Definitely culturally distinct from e.g. Greene County, PA.
I think there is a difference between "Northern" and "Southern" hicks, with the former being descendants of New England Yankees and the latter descendants of Scoth-Irish or other "Butternuts.". It's rare to see confederate flags for example, which (in the 1990s at least) wasn't the case in rural Pennsylvania. Definitely culturally distinct from e.g. Greene County, PA.
I've got inlaws not exactly around Ithaca, but not too far away (Southern Tier, near Corning and Elmira). And while you're right that there's a difference, I think the line is somewhere not too far west of the Hudson -- maybe the Hudson watershed would be a reasonable substitute. Southern Tier rural seems to me like the northmost end of Appalachia, and then when you're in the Hudson watershed, you're in the southwestern extreme of New England (not literally, New York's not a New England state, but that's where the affiliation is.)
Well sure, Greene County, PA is basically part of West Virginia, down to the accent.
Of course the Confederate flag is not unknown in either the farming or forested lands of central Pennsylvania either.
60: Southern Tier rural seems to me like the northmost end of Appalachia
Yes, by most definitions it is (and the Hudson watershed is a good demarcation on that side), although back in the '60s (when I was forming my geographical biases) it was not really considered so. See map here of the area currently covered by the Appalachian Regional Commission which origianaly did not include any part of New York. Tompkins County (Ithaca) is one of the counties that form the northern border.
These broad geographic/cultural demarcations are almost never cut-and-dried.
South-central PA has plenty of confederate flags too. The "Pennsyltucky" thing has an element of truth. I remember hearing growing up that Pennsylvania had more white supremacist groups than any other states.
On the other hand, south-central PA is definitely not in Appalachia, despite having plenty of southern hicks.
64: See, that's what people are arguing about. What makes you say 'definitely not?' The Appalachian mountains go right through the state.
Unfoggetarian is dissenting. I'm figuring I should be able to whip that up into an argument, if I nurture it carefully.
I think he said something disparaging about you, actually.
66: Got that right. It's a feud!
65.last: The Appalachian mountains go right through the state.
Most of the northern part of the Ridge-and-Valley province of the Appalachians is generally not included in anybody's definition of "Appalachia".
60: and then when you're in the Hudson watershed, you're in the southwestern extreme of New England
For lumpers maybe, for splitters, the Dutch influence on early development makes the lower Hudson Valley and Catskills a small distinct region (like Long Island*).
*Which these days is about 3 distinct regions (not even counting Queens and Brooklyn).
67.2: I think he said something disparaging about you, actually.
This transparent strategem is so far beneath both of us that is certainly not worth not responding to.
Most of the northern part of the Ridge-and-Valley province of the Appalachians is generally not included in anybody's definition of "Appalachia".
Can we at least not claim that the "Appalachia" part of Pennsylvania is a part that has no mountains in it? (the southwestern corner)
72: No we cannot. A large part of Appalachia are the low plateau regions on the western slopes. That is just the way it is. Go read the Wikipedia article linked in 62. I know this might be difficult for the literal-minded to accept.
Can we all agree that the third "a" in Appalachia is supposed to be pronounced soft? I was specifically taught this in a course on Appalachian history that I took at summer camp in North Carolina.
What does it mean to pronounce an "a" "soft"?
73: That can't be possible. I live on the low plateau region of the western slopes and I don't want to live in Appalachia.
I've always heard that called "short", not "soft". I've never heard Appalachian pronounced with a long A.
I know it's wrong, but I want to pronounce it with a long A. Short A sounds as if I'm faking an Appalachian accent.
80: I've never heard Appalachian pronounced with a long A.
It tends to split north to south. I learned it with a long A.
I've heard it enough both ways that I tend to assume either is correct. I go for short myself, at least most of the time.
I think you can either say long A and "sha" for the ch, or short A and "ch." There's also some corresponding vowel difference in the pronunciation of the "ia" part.
81: It's not wrong. And it is the appropriate pronunciation for a (potential) northern meddler like yourself.
Most of the experts and bureaucrats who came from Washington and elsewhere to fix the region's problems beginning in the 1960s adopted the northern pronunciation, while resident experts favor the southern-- which led to a situation, according to one commentator, wherein "people who said AppaLAYchia were perceived as outsiders who didn't know what they were talking about but were more than willing to tell people from the mountains what to do and how they should do it."
The 'i' kind of drops out of the long-A pronunciation. App-uh-lay-shan, rather than App-uh-lah-chi-an.
I think I-78 is a good border for where appalachia ends in Pennsylvania. The Harrisburg-Lancaster-York metro region mostly ends when the mountain starts. I think google maps agrees with me for the most part. The Carlisle/Chambersburg/Hagerstown corridor past I-78 is slightly more complicated, but I'd still put it on the non-appalachia side.
"Wrong" isn't exactly what I mean, but the short-a pronunciation is the one associated with the people who live there, mostly, so it seems as if it should be preferable.
My inclination is to use long-A when discussing the geographic feature, but the short-A when discussing the people. I suppose on some sort of "call people what they want to be called" default.
88: Yes, it's certainly more authentic.
Am I an asshole yet?
Baltimore certainly has southern hicks, not northern hicks. But no one would call it Appalachian. It's possible to be too far east to be Appalachian, just as it's possible to be too far north to be Appalachian.
You can also be too far west to be Appalachian. I'd say that starts at about Braddock Ave.
Baltimore certainly has southern hicks, not northern hicks. But no one would call it Appalachian.
No, they'd call it "Ballmer". Are we supposed to pronounce it that way, too?
The Appalachian Regional Commission's map seems to mostly agree with me. I think their border is running along the northern borders of Franklin, Cumberland, Dauphin, Lebanon, and Berks counties. Which agrees with my definition of South Central Pennsylvania (though Wikipedia's definition is slightly larger and includes some things that are Appalachian).
93: If you call it "BAHLmer" people will know you're an outsider.
I really want to move to Berks county, gain public office, and run for re-election so I can have a reasons to print up hundreds of signs saying "Moby Hick is working for Berks."
93: Only in Hamden, hon. Or Dundawk.
This is weirdly reminding me of the "City Goat" episode of Homicide. (I recall my first Baltimore cab ride, with the driver going on about how Marlon was playing that day. Who the fuck was Marlon?)
No, they'd call it "Ballmer". Are we supposed to pronounce it that way, too?
Having hung out with several Louisvillians for all of college, I have on occasion confused non-Kentuckians when I've spoken of Louvull.
99: Two guys were driving through Kentucky and they got into a fight about the correct way to pronounce Louisville. As they were getting close to Louisville, it was lunch time. They decided to stop for a burger and ask how to pronounce the name. They went to the counter and asked, "Could you pronounce the name of this place for us, and do it very slowly so we'll be sure to get it right." So the counterman goes "B-u-u-u-r-r-r-g-e-e-e-r K-i-i-i-n-g."
100: With a long e? Crazy regional dialects.
100: I actually got to be an asshole use a variant of that joke in person once.
Braves/Pirates championship series in the early 90s. Group of folks in front of me (from Hickory, North Carolina I had gleaned--relatives of one of the Atlanta pitchers) were confusedly discussing how to get to some place in town. One turned and asked me if I could help. To which I deadpanned, "You're not from here, right?" and he replied, "No, North Carolina". So I started with, "Well then I'll talk very slowly ...". He was a bit sore but his friends got a hoot out of it and he finally admitted that he had served up an easy one. And then I gave him bad directions the Braves won the series and ruined the whole damn joke. Absent alcohol I almost never actually say things like that out loud. To strangers, anyway.
Once I was asked, "How do I get to Heinz Hall?" I still regret not taking a swing at that one because I'll probably never have that chance again.
When we were boarding the plane yesterday, I handed the woman my ticket and she asked "Is the baby in the computer?" I took a few seconds biting back jokey answers before answering.
I am pleased that I answered appropriately when my 10th grade biology lab partner asked me how to skin the cat.
Tenth grade biology lab partner who is now a monk.
One day in 1934, he related, not without asperity, an experience he had had that afternoon with a Pennsylvania German farmer. While waiting on the city's outskirts for a bus to bring in a business associate, he fell into conversation with the farmer, who, clad in blue-and-white striped overalls, was standing beside his truck; he too was awaiting the bus. My father remarked that he had once been a farmer. With a contemptuous glance at my father's neat business suit and his shiny black car, the Dutchman turned and started to walk away. Then, suddenly, he whirled around and said, with a sneer, "You say you were a farmer. Well, how would you teach a calf to drink out of a milk pail?" Indignant that his word should be questioned, my father replied, "I don't know how you would do it, but I would take the calf's head between my legs, stick three fingers into its mouth, and thrust its head down into the pail."
107: Thanks to whoever linked that. Just read it. Holy shit, a "you kids get off my rural lawn" screed to end all "get off my lawn" screeds (plus other assorted barbs). And that was 1962, his fucking head must have exploded a few years later (or I guess maybe he anticipated it all). A few out-of-context quotes to whet the appetite:
Nor will the historian worship at the shrine of that Bitch-goddess, QUANTIFICATION.
...there is a mounting tendency to abandon other kinds of history to the social scientists, many of whom are brilliant men but who are even more culturally impoverished than we are. Their greatest deficiency is their lack of human understanding, which is the first requirement of the good historian; they do not understand or care about chaps.
This will be particularly difficult for most of the urban-bred scholars of today if their work is to show any real, perceptive comprehension of the workings of human nature. The deficiency is environmental, for in former times such understanding was vouchsafed to historians who were raised in the countryside or in the small town, where the eccentricities, idiosyncracies, and individual traits of people were allowed free play, openly, and more often than not encouraged, because they made them more interesting.
Yeah, it gets pretty crazy for a professional association presidential address. Not that I've read more than a few of them.
He's got that core point about rural and urban, which I think is real to the extent that you believe (and I sort of do, but not too much) that certain kinds of background familiarity are important to understanding the past, even if it's nothing that you formally cite, but then he goes all over the place.
109.2: Yeah I have some sympathy for that point, but it is so self-absorbed that it could have been titled "Last of the Historians: Me, Carl Bridenbaugh".
Given the theme of the talk I had to laugh when one of the first Amazon reviews of his book Vexed and Troubled Englishmen 1590-1642 read:
I had to read this book and write a book report about it. ... I can't stand social history. It doesn't "read" well; why not just make a list: Food eaten by Peasant: Brown Bread. Size of Peasants house: varies Roofing material: see boring book.
That review is hilarious. Especially since the address seems to be famous, in the bad sense, for this derogatory bit:
Furthermore, many of the younger practitioners of our craft, and those who are still apprentices, are products of lower middle-class or foreign origins, and their emotions not infrequently get in the way of historical reconstructions. They find themselves in a very real sense outsiders on our past and feel themselves shut out. This is certainly not their fault, but it is true. They have no experience to assist them, and the chasm between them and the Remote Past widens every hour. In our graduate schools we are training a host of skilled historical technicians, but all of us here, I think, will have to conclude that very few of our colleagues rise today to the high level of significant generalization or display either profound analytical powers or marked narrative proficiency... [and he goes on]
Yeah, how about I tell you the story that ends with fuck you, clown.
3: Yeah, yeah, but it would be pretty sweet to see 7-year-old-Indira and 11-year-old-Joey take out 9 year old Jamie.
I just read the photo-essay, and I think I'm rooting for Lanine and the unnamed 4-year-old Romanian boy to appear in this particular tag-team matchup. But clearly somebody needs to do it before the rioters get that kid up against a wall as an adult.
I don't find it irritating all that much, actually. It really brings home "This is what the disparity in world wealth looks like."