Yes, but the one handed open rip is worth it.
Presumably the backside-enhancing properties of this particular pair of jeans are not directly related to the button fly. Or are they?
Perhaps "backside-highlighting" would have been a better phrasing there.
If one were reprehensibly ungallant, one might note the frustration with button flies expressed by certain ladies of one's acquaintance.
1 is correct. Also 501s were all we wore for jeans when in high school. Also Reebok hightops.
if the jeans make your ass look great then it's worth the minor annoyance of the button fly, such as it is (I don't find them particularly troublesome, either wearing them myself, or in the situation flippanter gallantly merely alludes to above.) I have to wear an uncomfortable nude thong to wear the white adriano goldshmied jeans I payed nearly $300 for at calypso in east hampton. the magical ass-enchacing powers are way worth it. I sell more furniture in them, for real.
also FUCK CRO/OKED T/IMBER right now. lots of normal commenters for whom I used to have respect have been sexist douches for 100 comments. if I wanted that I would read WWTDD, thank you very much. motherfuckers be driving to douchetown in the fucking douchemobile.
If you drive the douchemobile to enematown.... On second thought, let us not go there.
I imagine a douchemobile looking like the Pussy Wagon from Kill Bill, but not self-aware.
The Pussy Wagon was self-aware? Like Kitt?
KITT only seemed self-aware compared to the actors appearing on screen.
7:Anybody notice MY's post Women Earn Most Doctoral Degrees? Even in the harder sciences now. But they don't yet have 75% of the faculty positions and Deanships(?), so they remain as oppressed as chattal slaves.
I am interested in current feminist discourse as a battle for privilege rather than a battle against privilege. Let's get real. There is no subaltern doing critiques of GRRM's medievalism.
B's/a's CT 272.2 second half. Real revolutionaries and leftists are also told to calm down and get reasonable and make effective arguments rather than shouting BSD&TTS. The New Guy at Digby's was pleased as punch at the bourgeois civility of the Wall Street protestors. Gotta sell radical change like peanut butter, revolution must be commodified. Tell it to the Greeks.
7. I must admit I gave up on that thread as soon as it started talking about GRRM, because if I had a dollar for every remark on the internet I've come across which has convinced me never to go near those books with a punt pole, I'd be richer than he is.
OTOH, having now skimmed the thing, FFS, IS THIS USENET ON A BAD NIGHT? What is the matter with these people?
And don't get me started on Steig of the Dumpbin Display. Whoever thought those books should be published? Gaaahhh!
OTOH, I thought the comic was excellent. So there's that.
The button on a pair of 501s prevented a friend from accidentally chopping off the head of his cock. He was not observing best practices for the safe use of a chisel, but it is still nice to have a backup.
O reason not the name something something.
15: They make boxers out of chain mail.
And how did GRRM become the entire subject of the thread, anyway? I mean, these things happen here, but I thought CT threads tend to be at least vaguely related to the original post. My eyes glaze over when people start talking about fantasy novels, so I haven't read much of it. Why not more discussion of the comic? My enjoyment of CT would increase immensely if it became a webcomic entirely written and drawn by Belle, or maybe with contributions from John Holbo or illustrations by their children.
20: I liked the plaintive tone in which I imagined "don't start a tumblr about me" to have been uttered. That's sort of the way I expect everybody but Gawker Media's select force of Internet sociopaths to respond to the threat of social-mediation.
@14 & 20
I haven't read any of GRRM's books either, and the decidedly late-90s-UseNet quality of the recent discussions about them haven't encouraged me to check them out.
It seems that many folks think that GRRM deserves to be hailed as bold and groundbreaking because he writes fantasy novels that aren't all noble knights and fair maidens. I can only assume this is because the GoT books are read by a lot of people who aren't very familiar with the fantasy genre as a whole.
If only "Ogre" from Revenge of the Nerds could be unleashed upon all "GRRM" related threads. Ogre, where are you?
My enjoyment of CT would increase immensely if it became a webcomic entirely written and drawn by Belle, or maybe with contributions from John Holbo or illustrations by their children.
Occasionally featuring a stickman Derauqsd in a black hat.
TBH, I tend to find CT comment threads filled with a shower of bastards, anyway.
if the jeans make your ass look great then it's worth the minor annoyance of the button fly
I refuse to wear pants with a button fly. I am certain my ass looks great regardless.
The 501 shrink-to-fits are the finest jeans known to exist, and are regularly available at my local salvage and surplus for about 15 dollars a pair. The big advantage of button flies is that they always lie flat even as the pants shrink and stretch.
I like button-fly jeans, but can't wear almost any Levis as the waist is always too high and narrow relative to the hips, on me at least. They feel like they are cut for women. This sizing thing preceded me becoming a fat bastard; I couldn't wear them even when I was skinny. They look perfectly fine on other people.
29: have you ever tried 514s? Levis always looked stupid on me, but those are great.
they're always promising to make computers that scan you and then bespoke jeans. I guess levi's has one place in SF that will do this. and you choose the exact wash and everything. I WANT THAT.
my husband has all his (work) clothes custom-made, and they are so much more flattering. the girls and I go to the tailor and make all the choices (they love flipping through the shirting fabric swatch book) and then he just gets measured (and fitted again when the suits are partially done). I am happy to report that due to continual exercise and having taken up boxing, his pants are all too loose again and his shirts are just starting to stretch across his shoulders in a way that is most becoming.
I've finally convinced him to get some stovepipe pants with a high three-button jacket a la early beatles, but he won't buy super skinny hipster jeans even though he can pull them off now. please! I'm asking you! dude, this is the person you have sex with, listen to me, man! incentives matter! it's not like I don't buy, say, thigh-high boots just because he likes them. I feel I should be listened to, here.
re: 30
Not that I remember. I stopped trying Levis on after a decade or so of not finding any I could wear. There were a few some years back I really liked the look of, too. But they either fit round the waist, but looked like jodhpurs round the arse/thigh area, or vice versa.
I like to think of myself as fashionable and hip, but I still wear my jeans in the slouchy grunge fashion which means I'm neither fashionable nor hip. I do have a pair or two of high-waisted jeans which I adore, though, which seems a little more hip.
I really want to look cool, and I'm not embarrassed to admit that.
31: For everybody but ESPN jaw-flappers, the era of the high-buttoning three-button jacket has, thanks be to the Lord and His mercy, passed.
32: That's why they make the shrink-to-fit Levis.
re: 31
I heartily approve of the boxing. It hasn't really worked for me in terms of skinnification [although I'm down about 18lbs this year] but it's fun.
Plain old button fly 501s have always fit me perfectly, so buying jeans has been a purely thought free exercise.
It was only after years that I heard other people talking about their quest for jeans that actually fit right and realized that I lucked out.
re: 36
I find it hard to understand how shrinking to fit will change the proportions of the cut, rather than just the size?
32: yeah, it was much the same for me, but when I got fancier low-waisted jeans I'd wear holes in the crotch basically instantly, 'cuz you know. So I asked a fashionable gay dude, and he recommended the 514s (which are a newer style, maybe?) and they fit awesome.
A friend of mine told me that there is a lot of buzz about JO jeans. I'm paraphrasing, but it was a weird conversation which felt like how they talk in LA, in the movies.
Anyway they are alledgedly the most flattering jeans ever. And there is a JO outlet in our local ridiculous double wide outlet mall. So we headed over.
The outlet mall is either 150% full or totally deserted, and this was the latter, so swarms of employees accosted us and talked us into a mini-fashion show.
It was really fun to be fawned over, but they kept cramming us into smaller and smaller pants. I get that jeans stretch, and they wanted these to look good after wearing them for two hours. But the waistband doesn't stretch that much, and was much too tight on my belly, and yet they were blowing insane amounts of smoke up my ass that the jeans looked gorgeous. It was weird and not rude exactly, but made for some strange conversations.
At any rate, I don't like wearing tight clothing, so none of the jeans appealed to me. My friend bought two pairs, though.
YOU KNOW WHAT I DON'T GET? MAYONNAISE JARS. WHY DO THEY MAKE THESE LIDS SO DARNED TIGHT?
Funnily enough the only jeans I've bought recently that fit properly were either quite expensive 'designer' jeans [100quid-ish] or cheap chain store ones [25quid-ish].
7: I honestly don't see anything in that CT thread that hasn't appeared in about a thousand equally dumbassed Feministosphere vs. Geekosphere slap-fights on that and similar venues in Blogistan. I did try to start a conversation about the actual comic, but whatcha gonna do.
(I do have to give some props to Rich Puchalsky, though, who's had more intelligent things to say on CT recently than most of its own bloggers.)
35: nonsense, they can be charming. only with a certain type of tie. it's a purposefully retro look, obviously, but if you have the legs for it, it is very sexy. I suppose the stovepipe pants could in principle be paired with a lower-buttoning jacket, but I think not.
44: agreed. it was just that it all went south so fast. rich pulchasky can be a pain in the neck about literary theory, but he's kicking ass in that thread. my husband implored me to close the tab, so I did, grumble complain.
39: you put them on while still damp, and wear them a bit, and they shrink more where they are loose.
But that means you have to wash your pants all the time! Or at least wet yourself.
I tend to buy button-fly 501s -- I'm not much for the supertight jeans look, and they're comfortable on me. And the annoyingness of the buttons is greatly mitigated after a couple of washings as the fly softens up. On brand-new jeans it's a hassle, but once they're broken in it's no thing. Never noticed trouble getting them off anyone else, but Buck wears zippers so it's been a long long time.
JO jeans, eh? I guess this combination of letters only stands for exactly one thing if you are a homosexual. I still occasionally laugh about Juvenile Offender cases when they are referred to in abbreviation because I am very mature.
Oh now I'm embarrassed. I'm going presidential.
49: No, you shrink them once, and then wash as infrequently as possible.
Now 51 has that old "Bad Idea" jeans sketch stuck in my head.
I'm having a failure of imagination as to what else JO stands for.
46: The thing that happened in that thread happens a lot at the intersection of feminist critique and stuff guys are fond of (not that there aren't women who like the GRRM books very much. I liked the first one a lot, despite the issues Sady points out, the next two less, and then gave up). It's very much the same shape argument we used to have here all the time about whatsername's ass (I have actually forgotten. Jessica something? I think I'm getting her mixed up with the actress from Flashdance, who I know is wrong.) In the moment, I tend to find the reactions from the guys involved maddening, but it happens with guys I really do think well of generally, who are mostly on what I think of as the right side of gender issues, so I try not to get too annoyed and try not to burn any bridges.
Jeremy Orons? Joliet Oreo? Joshin' Ogden? Joint Oats?
In Pittsburgh, you spell it jagoff.
Lucky jeans seem to fit me just right at present. I mean no jeans ever made fit me without a severe hem, but they fit well otherwise. (I wear holes in the crotch of most jeans rather quickly because, well, you know what they say about guys who leave long blog comments.*) If you are crafty about things, you can get them on sale for $35 here and there. Best of all, they do not require an uncomfortable nude thong.
*They walk funny. And it wears holes in the crotch of their jeans.
60: lucky jeans are the ones I kept wearing holes in the crotch of! Am I writing a novel, here?
JO jeans, eh?
With the distinctive, easy-open fly.
Hee. Carl Orff humor. Actually it was his intelligent but socially inept (and inexplicably French) brother Jacques Orff.
Note to self to make masturbation joke about Jacques Offenbach if ever I revive the opera blog.
Oh, wow, the CT thread has progressed to Your Lurkers Have Threatened Us In E-Mail territory. Charming.
I tried the 514s but they didn't quite work for me. I now wear the 511s, which I love. They're called "Skinny", but they're not hipsterishly so, I don't think.
67: Huh? You mean Belle talking about how Sady was deleting obscene/threatening blog comments? That's not so much progression, as something Sady said explicitly back in her second post. She might have been making it up back then, but it's not news now.
I do wish looser jeans would come back in. I'd like Sally to wear pants where she could make use of the pockets. And where she had room to grow a half inch without making them unwearable instantly.
It was really fun to be fawned over, but they kept cramming us into smaller and smaller pants.
I have also had this experience at a fancy jeans store! It is confusing, because I couldn't tell if they really did think that jeans should be non-breathingly tight, or if there was some sort of policy to get people in the smallest jeans possible (as some weird form of flattery?), or if they were all just unthinkingly transferring their own young-and-teeny-person jean preferences to their older and not-size-0 customer.
They're called "Skinny", but they're not hipsterishly so, I don't think.
I've found that the names of jean cuts seem to have nothing to do with how they actually fit. Except for the old Gap jeans, which were clearly aspirationally named. I tried on the "curvy" fit, and they were these giant tent things. It turned out the "long and lean" (which I am decidedly not) fit was what I needed.
re: 72
GAP still use aspirational sizing in some of their stuff. Their jeans in the size I wear from other places are hanging off me from there. I'm pretty sure they are at least one size more flattering to the buyer than other places.
I've found that the names of jean cuts seem to have nothing to do with how they actually fit
This, with respect to pants generally. It would make me so happy if there were some generally recognized non-pejorative vocabulary of different body types so you could identify whether clothes were likely to be roughly your shape before trying them on. Instead, words describing different fits are all either completely random or misleadingly flattering -- if you learn what one term means within a particular brand or designer, it might keep meaning the same thing for a year or two, but that's the best you can hope for.
It turned out the "long and lean" (which I am decidedly not) fit was what I needed.
In turn, I have had this exact experience.
May I recommend Uniqlo? Go for their darkest Japanese denim, for a very economical approximation of something much more expensive. And they do both a 501-ish and a shoreditch spacesuit cut.
It would make me so happy if there were some generally recognized non-pejorative vocabulary of different body types so you could identify whether clothes were likely to be roughly your shape before trying them on.
Like if there was a number you could assign to your waist, hips, and leg length.
77.last: Google isn't helping here.
Fleur long encouraged me to abandon my "relaxed fit" dad jeans in favor of something more fashionable. I ended up buying some jeans from Joop that are much more flattering to ass and package. Fleur was delighted by this wardrobe renewal, right up to the moment when her somewhat flirtatious friend cooed to me that I should wear those jeans more often, "...for the benefit of the ladies of [PDBS]."
78: Damn mathemeticians! Always wanting to quantify everything!
I do wish looser jeans would come back in.
There's hope. Just the other day I was considering switching to a tighter fit, so I expect loose will be back shortly thereafter.
My "Skinny" jeans. Okay to wear despite my not being 20?
Also, is "revive the opera blog" the East Coast elite version of "reset the Tivo"?
69: I think of the trope as being the use of alleged and unverifiable hordes of online threats to excuse and defend what would otherwise look like not-particularly-impressive behaviour (yes, like Sady's second post), and more importantly to Declare This Thread Officially Dead. ("Alleged" doesn't necessarily mean entirely "made-up;" Lord knows one needn't work especially hard at it to get Threatened Over the Internet.)
74: "Aspirational sizing" is a great phrase. Seems to me like it would apply to the ultra-skinny sizes, though?
re: 77
Yeah, was in there a couple of weeks ago and bought a bunch of t-shirts, jumpers, and a jacket. The jeans weren't quite right, though, so I ended up buying a couple of pairs from Next, of all places. In plain 'dark denim'.
Is "reset the Tivo" the same thing as "comment on unfogged"?
re: 85
Well, they clearly sell fat person* sizes labelled as fat person minus one, or fat person minus two.
* i.e. the size I wear
87: Not unless people are having waaaaay more fun commenting on Unfogged than I previously suspected.
84: Clearly a dignified jean, suitable for the mature commenter.
85.1: Eh, I think you're misreading.
Urbandictionary doesn't know what "reset the Tivo" means, so I'm not convinced it means anything.
This entire thread reminds me, shamefully, of the episode of Friends in which one character's quit-smoking-while-you-sleep subliminal tapes are meddled with by another, so that the mantra is something like "Joey is your best friend... You want to buy him hundreds of dollars worth of pants...."
On the other hand, I have tried to explain the importance of natural indigo dye and selvage/selvedge denim to friends, who all kept getting hung up on secondary questions like "How much?" and "Why are Levi Strauss' old looms in Japan now, anyway?," so my hands are not exactly clean.
Even more shamefully, I'm mentally correcting your inaccurate recall of that episode.
94. I've never seen it anywhere but here. I supposed it was a piece of innuendo that I'd grasp if I RTFA'd back to about 2004 and then be disappointed by how banal it was really.
97: By replaying old episodes of Friends in my head.
I supposed it was a piece of innuendo that I'd grasp if I RTFA'd back to about 2004 and then be disappointed by how banal it was really.
You'd be right!
(Either Teo or Ogged or neither of them was experiencing a drought, and they got laid or didn't, I forget, but then they reset their TiVO and it sounded like they were announcing the good news.)
98: That's about it. I forget sometimes that there are people to whom the intricacies of Ogged's sex life or lack thereof are lost in the mists of time.
100: I think Phoebe had the tapes on recommendation from a friend, and gave them to Chandler, and unbeknownst to all they were aimed at women so the message was something like "You are a strong, powerful woman" and then hilarity ensued when Chandler began acting unconsciously feminine.
Damn mathemeticians!
I.e. theorists who devise definitions, proofs and theorems so fiendishly complicated that trying to understand them makes you throw up.
Today we are all archivists.
I forget sometimes that there are people to whom the intricacies of Ogged's sex life or lack thereof are lost in the mists of time.
It can't have been long before I started hanging out. I remember it referred to Ogged. Teo's drought was another matter altogether.
WE REALLY PREFER TO BE KNOWN AS "LIBRARIANS OF ALEXANDRIA"!
I interpreted "reset the Tivo" as something akin to "cleared the browser cache".
Lucky jeans seem to fit me the best.
I need to get some new suits and dress shirts soon. I should probably just fly to Hong Kong/Narnia to get a bunch of them.
No one cares what a bunch of Ptolemy-lovers prefer, Larry! You're the reason the budget for undifferentiated bundles of papyrus used to mummify Middle Kingdom bureaucrats was cut!
I second the recommendation for Uniqlo jeans.
Both of you, settle down. It's difficult enough to work with linen without you two jiggling around in it at the same time.
You just want me to get an abortion!
I wish Uniqlo would hurry up and open a store in SF. I hear awesome things about their clothes, but the only store in the US is in New York.
the era of the high-buttoning three-button jacket has
If I could button high for alameida, I would, till she cry, "lover, gold-hatted, high-buttoning lover, I must have you!"
Sadly, I'm not sure I can button high at all, and I am sure I can't button high for her.
:(
I'm asking you! dude, this is the person you have sex with, listen to me, man! incentives matter!
Monogamy has its downsides, but at least you don't have a whole bunch of people telling you what you should wear.
Monogamy has its downsides, but at least you don't have a whole bunch of people telling you what you should wear.
You must not work in an office.
The people in my office care that I wear pants, but nobody has ever cared about what type of pants.
LET'S JUST AGREE THAT THE ONE WE ALL REALLY HATE IS THE BIBLIOTHECAL WORKER OF ALEXANDRIA.
I'm struggling to recall the exact details or the actual comment, but (IIRC) for some reason ogged's TiVo had gotten unplugged or something the night that he and his then-fiancee broke up, and so some part of the display was then keeping an exact count of the time since the last time he'd had sex.
Oh right. That's the key detail of the story.
Instead of breaking your TiVo, you could just get one of those chess clocks.
The people in my office care that I wear pants
Would they mind if you wore a kilt or a sarong (question expecting the answer No)?
Would they mind if you wore a kilt or a sarong (question expecting the answer No)?
Num, would they mind if …?
121, 122: Didn't he disconnect it in the course of moving out, or of her moving, and then never set it up properly? Something like that.
127. Exactly. But-ne, I'm not sure whether everybody in this thread would get the reference.
128: yeah, that was it, I think; he just never set the date again.