Re: Nil nisi verum

1

Reminds me of someone.


Posted by: Minivet | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 12:03 AM
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Fuck you nosflow, I was eating my breakfast.


Posted by: chris y | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 2:07 AM
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Riveted by the sociological significance.

Also: Canada, for example, one of the five richest countries in the world, is torn and may be destroyed by what, to the outsider, look like utterly senseless ethnic animosities.

Yes, Canada, that hellhole of internecine brutality, the Somalia of the North.


Posted by: Alex | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 3:37 AM
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"We need to say that, because it goes without saying."


Posted by: Francis Maude | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 4:05 AM
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Also: Particularly horrifying was this alt.sex.stories. I don't know how to work the Internet yet, but I did that research. I found it written up.

In the journal version of alt.sex.stories, of course.


Posted by: Awl | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 5:38 AM
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He had a mighty crowded (and extensive) lawn.


Posted by: md 20/400 | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 6:03 AM
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5: He once asked an aide to print out Hamster Dance.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 6:29 AM
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I'm fairly sure some ellipses have been dropped, which is annoying. That book isn't that discongruous from sentence to sentence.


Posted by: urple | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 6:48 AM
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I saw an interview a while ago with the woman pilot who was, Bork reminds us, "raped *and* sodomized." When asked about it, she said something along the lines of "I'm not going to tell other people's stories, but there were a lot of other American prisoners. Do you really think I'm the only one that happened to? People feel more comfortable asking about my experience because I'm a woman."


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 6:51 AM
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Toobin was too nice.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 6:59 AM
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"I watched for some time -- riveted by the sociological significance of it all."


Posted by: Bave | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 7:01 AM
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11 really should be the new mouseover.


Posted by: urple | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 7:03 AM
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From John O'Sullivan's obituary at NRO:

And though Bob was pessimistic in principle -- American popular culture doesn't encourage optimism -- he was great fun in practice: sharp in argument, clear of meaning, drily witty in delivery, and full of an avuncular charm. Any woman seated next to him at a dinner party had a highly enjoyable evening.
...laydeez!


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 7:04 AM
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Shockingly, Bork was a U of C grad.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 7:09 AM
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A lot of people comfort themselves with the thought that this is confined to the black community, but that's not true -- some of the worst rappers are white, like Nine Inch Nails.

I'm a fan of NIN, but I'll admit that Bork may have been on to something, here; Reznor's flow was for shit.


Posted by: x.trapnel | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 7:10 AM
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Remember when everyone was worried that conservatives had developed a massive intellectual advantage over liberals, evidenced by deep thinkers like Bork?


Posted by: Bave | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 7:21 AM
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14 And though Bob was pessimistic in principle -- American popular culture doesn't encourage optimism...

Conservatives. Not only do they hate America, they don't even understand it.


Posted by: Barry Freed | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 7:32 AM
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15: Freshwater "U of C" if that needed clarification.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 7:33 AM
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18: Wait, which bob is that?


Posted by: | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 7:33 AM
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11- I only watch hotel porn for the interviews!
Also: One evening at a hotel in New York I flipped around the television channels. Suddenly there on the public access channel was a voluptuous young woman, naked, her body oiled, writhing on the floor while fondling herself intimately. I call foul on the "Suddenly"- hotel TVs will ask several times to confirm that you want the charge applied to your room bill.


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 7:36 AM
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18: I don't think he meant that American popular culture doesn't encourage people to be optimistic, but that looking at American popular culture causes thoughtful people who are above it all, the writer of this text and his/her readers, to despair for our future.

Watch Two and A Half Men and see if you can dismiss this view it out of hand.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 7:36 AM
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21: NYC has porny public access tv. Or it used to, anyway.


Posted by: oudemia | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 7:39 AM
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17: That was awesome!


Posted by: Chris Farley | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 7:40 AM
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22:1 Right, like "from Elvis to Snoop Doggy Dog"

22.last No


Posted by: Barry Freed | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 7:41 AM
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25 last, "No" as in "No, I will not watch it"


Posted by: Barry Freed | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 7:42 AM
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You can watch the rerun if you're a Charlie Sheen fan.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 7:42 AM
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I don't even have an TV showing oiled, naked women for free.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 7:44 AM
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21: I don't think he means naked naked. I think he means mostly naked: nakeder than she should be on public tv. With all the oil/writhing/fondling, I would bet he is describing a music video, probably one of those despicable unmelodic rap videos.


Posted by: urple | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 7:54 AM
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Surprisingly, north Dakota has better reception than Minnesota or Wisconsin did.


Posted by: heebie-heebie | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 7:56 AM
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Dakotaist.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 8:00 AM
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30. The hotel staff can actually find your booking? The hotel staff are oiled and naked? Hotel staff culture encourages optimism?


Posted by: chris y | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 8:02 AM
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29: NYC public access at the time featured plenty of naked-naked; there were (a number of?) shows that were essentially fairly hardcore long-form ads for strip clubs and escorts.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 8:12 AM
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No, we've just gotten a rousing round of applause, with a lovely bowl of punch and some cookies.


Posted by: heebie-heebie | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 8:12 AM
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Alas, Channel J.


Posted by: Spike | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 8:18 AM
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33: All we every got on public access was city council meetings and some guy trying to explain Marxism while adjusting his own camera as he talked.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 8:21 AM
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This man has had a greater impact on the world than almost any other modern writer I've written about.

I don't know who else this blogger has written about, but did Bork really have such a great impact? Is he referring to his importance to jurisprudence?

All those quotes just seem like garden-variety reactionary rhetoric that might have been written by at least a dozen other well-known fools. He wasn't the first, was he?


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 8:21 AM
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34: Are you touring as a singing group?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 8:21 AM
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I've been reading on Twitter that he had a huge impact on antitrust jurisprudence.


Posted by: Minivet | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 8:27 AM
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The judicial gutting of antitrust law is one of the more dramatic examples of legislating from the bench, and yet somehow conservatives never seem to bring it up as an example of judicial overreach.


Posted by: Walt Someguy | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 8:30 AM
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Probably the most left-wing TED talk ever was given by a model. I think the Communist Party should switch to recruiting from models alone.


Posted by: Walt Someguy | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 8:32 AM
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The amazing thing in that Guardian list is that Maude didn't make the cut for accidentally causing a petrol shortage and setting a woman on fire.


Posted by: Alex | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 8:32 AM
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||

Hey, some holiday music.

|>


Posted by: Bave | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 8:47 AM
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I don't know who else this blogger has written about, but did Bork really have such a great impact?

Bigger than Krasznahorkai.


Posted by: nosflow | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 8:53 AM
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What I find, in retrospect, mystifying about the Bork nomination is that he wasn't absolutely off the table for his participation in the Saturday Night Massacre. His views on the law, obviously, were a problem, but I'd think having been Nixon's tool in firing the special prosecutor in the middle of Watergate would mean that he could never have a high profile public office again.

I wasn't really aware of his Watergate role during the fight over his Supreme Court nomination, but I don't remember it even being mentioned much.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:00 AM
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You'd think that Rehnquist's involvement in anti-civil-rights stuff would have kept him off the court, but you'd be wrong.


Posted by: Bave | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:05 AM
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||
Holy shit, the NRA is actually holding a press conference blaming school shootings on gun-free school zones.
|>


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:07 AM
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Just wait til you get to Glasgow. (My paralegal taught me her HS football cheer from Wolf Point the other day -- 'er qua init, the wolves are gonna winnit')


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:07 AM
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Wayne LaPierre is an ass.


Posted by: Spike | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:08 AM
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This is pretty funny, I think a significant number of the "press" in the audience are actually protesters, one is popping up every couple minutes.


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:13 AM
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Apparently its very important to have guns so Patriotic Americans can shot brown people after hurricanes or natural disasters.

Also too, violent video games are bad, because they encourage "fantasizing about killing people as a way to get your kicks." Funny, I thought that's what the NRA was all about.


Posted by: Spike | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:13 AM
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I'd like to defend fantasizing about killing people, via video games or not. I don't know how you're supposed to function without it.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:15 AM
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51.2 Way wrong! The NRA is opposed to fantasizing!


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:15 AM
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Reminds me of someone.

Keep in mind that Neb's adolescent self-confidence could actually be attributed to adolescence.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:16 AM
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Just don't be fantasizing about Wayne LaPierre's head on a stick.


Posted by: Spike | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:19 AM
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Right, only on a pike.


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:19 AM
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"Can't we afford to put an armed police officer in every single school?" Um, no?


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:20 AM
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We could do it if we got rid of all that foreign aid.


Posted by: Spike | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:21 AM
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58

What if we armed police officers with pikes?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:21 AM
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If pikes are outlawed, only outlaws will be able to form into squares and defend themselves against cavalry charges.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:23 AM
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simply hire the most fitting students to serve as police officers for their schools & arm them. simple as that.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:23 AM
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We can debate our ideas later... now is the time for taking action!


Posted by: Spike | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:26 AM
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47 Excellent, let this be the hill they die on. Metaphorically speaking, of course.


Posted by: Barry Freed | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:30 AM
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First we need to gut the New Deal to free up some money for invading China.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:31 AM
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Its awfully kind of America's armed vigilantes to be so willing to volunteer to provide school safety.


Posted by: Spike | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:32 AM
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Excellent, now it's apparently just a pork program for the NRA- they humbly suggest themselves as the best organization to provide training for all these new armed volunteer school guards.


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:32 AM
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NYC has porny public access tv. Or it used to, anyway.

I miss Robin Byrd! It was never even faintly erotic, but she was an endearing televisionic presence. Lie back, get comfortable...


Posted by: Mister Smearcase | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:37 AM
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I've come up with the solution for school shootings.

I'm convinced by the wise men of the NRA that the problem is not guns. Oddly they fail to point out what the real problem is.

The problems is schools. End school violence by closing the schools!


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:42 AM
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Along with the claim that Newtown was an extension of Fast and Furious, that was one of the nut-wing arguments going around- all you suckers who didn't home school are responsible for putting your kids in danger.


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:44 AM
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NRA: Put a gov't employee with a gun in every public space. Also: Citizens must arm selves to defend against gov't tyranny. -- @jamisonfoser

Posted by: Minivet | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:48 AM
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70: Heh. I wonder if they ever focus grouped this shit with parents, even gun-owning parents?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:51 AM
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Maybe, instead of schools, our childrens could attend NRA training programs for 180 days a year.


Posted by: Spike | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:53 AM
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Hopefully the V-chip will solve this problem.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:53 AM
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The V-chip at least reduces the amount of oily porn shown on your TV.


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:55 AM
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Seriously, who wants to raise a kid to only feel safe surrounded by armed guards?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:58 AM
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The NRA.


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 10:00 AM
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I liked them better when they were afraid of the government.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 10:06 AM
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(One may translate 'er qua init' as basically 'holy crap')


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 10:12 AM
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(I was thinking about this this morning not only in connection with theJamGeeb's travels, but also for the defeat of the wingnuts in a small battle here. We're having wolf trapping season. A trapper got all pissed off that certain areas of national forest are designated as XC trails [which are therefore closed to snow mobiles except for the one hauling grooming equipment] and so he put up signs saying that people with kids and dogs should watch out, because he'd put traps along/in some of the trails. Shitstorm ensued, people lining up as expected, except a whole lot of folks with live and let live attitudes about hunting turned out to have strong feelings about endangering kids and dogs. Although the trapper would have been within his rights on he state of the regulations to have done so, at the time, the shitstorm caused a very quick change of regulation. Turns out he hadn't actually placed the traps, but just wanted to dramatize his access issue. Too bad he found out that support for wolf trapping is a lot thinner than he thought. I'm kind of thinking the NRA might be making the same mistake.

The wolves are gonna winnit.)


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 10:20 AM
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69: Because as the shooter's mom can attest, there's nothing safer than guns in the home.


Posted by: Lord Castock | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 10:24 AM
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My mom works at an elementary school, and says nearly all of the teachers there support the idea of armed guards in the schools. Some of them are advocating that the principal carry a gun. I suspect this is a much more widely-accepted idea than most of us would like to think it is.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 10:27 AM
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I would suspect that it's heavily geographically dependent. Don't know where your mom teaches, but I'd bet that wherever she is, guns are a lot more popular than they are around here.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 10:32 AM
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Yeah, I'm sure it is. But I really would have expected teachers almost everywhere to be against guns in schools. Apparently not in suburban middle-middle-class urpleville.


Posted by: essear | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 10:42 AM
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I'd think even where you live Elbie, there's plenty of support for armed security guards. Am I wrong about that?


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 10:45 AM
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Maybe armed police or other professionals, not this "community volunteer" BS the NRA is talking about.


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 10:54 AM
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Maybe armed police or other professionals...

And suddenly that's become the acceptable solution instead of sensible gun control laws.


Posted by: Barry Freed | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 10:56 AM
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Where's the money going to come from for that?


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 10:59 AM
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I've gone into a couple of NYC public schools on business, and they're locked down like a prison. Lots of security theater, from metal detectors and gates to armed cops; in fact making them really unpleasant and, I'd argue, psychologically damaging to the kids and teachers.


Posted by: Bave | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 11:00 AM
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87: Donut sales! That's how we raised money for the chess club.


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 11:09 AM
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Merit pay for teachers who are willing to carry firearms!


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 11:19 AM
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87 -- I know my son's (former) high school has a police liaison, and would think the other 2 high schools here do as well. He let my son and a gal pose on the hood of his car with his guns -- much to the chagrin of my wife -- but the yearbook wasn't allowed to run the picture.

So, yeah, I'd guess that city taxpayers will pick this up.


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 11:21 AM
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There are certainly armed guards in NYC high schools -- my sense is that they're supposed to be protection against low-level student-led violence (fights, violation of school rules and resistance to attempts to impose discipline) rather than against mass murder (my prejudices lead me to believe that it's mostly a stupid idea having armed guards for that purpose too, but I don't work in a city high school). But I'd be surprised by a teacher around here who thought that armed guards were a good idea in a school where daily violence wasn't a problem.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 11:25 AM
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Come to think, I actually don't know if the security guards at my kids' old elementary school and current middle school are armed. I wouldn't have thought they were (both women, neither looks like an ex-cop, and I never noticed a gun), but I suppose it's possible they're both packing and I never noticed. Monica, at the elementary school, I'm pretty sure can't have been armed, but I don't think I've ever seen the guard at the middle school out from behind her desk.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 11:29 AM
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We always had cops on campus. I don't think they were armed, but I never wondered about it, actually. As I've mentioned before, the elementary school nearest my parents' house has an officer that lives full time in a trailer on school grounds. They've had someone live there for the past 25 years and still vandalism and theft are big problems.

Both children are napping and north Dakota is pretty when the sun is out. Otherwise it's pretty grim.


Posted by: heebie-heebie | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 11:30 AM
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All citizens that refuse to carry a firearm are required to pay an extra tax (or fee) for security, since they aren't willing to provide security for themselves.


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 11:31 AM
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95 Now you're thinkin'.


Posted by: Barry Freed | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 11:33 AM
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96: It's a new and exciting experience for me!


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 11:36 AM
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I assume that if we have an armed guard in every school in the country, the next crazed mass murderer will hit a daycare somewhere. And then of course we'll need to put armed guards there, too. And then on every subway car. And every city bus. Just in case. Oh, let's not forget the churches! All those unarmed people, gathered together, just sitting ducks.


Posted by: urple | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 11:39 AM
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|| HG, right after you leave Havre, I think you'll see the Wahkpa Chu'gn pishkun on the left side. In case you feel the need for some dramatic storytelling.

Your kids probably aren't old enough to talk about the Nez Perce as you pass by the Bear Paw battlefield, south of Chester (just east of Havre). From where the sun now stands, I will fight no more forever is a good story too, though. |>


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 11:42 AM
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Oh, let's not forget the churches! All those unarmed people, gathered together, just sitting ducks.

Unarmed? At church? What kind of sissy church do you go to, urple?



Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 11:42 AM
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100

98: We'd never provide security for public transportation.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 11:45 AM
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I am tired of fighting. Our chiefs are killed. Looking Glass is dead. Toohulhulsote is dead. The old men are all dead. It is the young men who say yes or no. He who led the young men is dead. It is cold and we have no blankets. The little children are freezing to death. My people, some of them, have run away to the hills and have no blankets, no food. No one knows where they are--perhaps freezing to death. I want to have time to look for my children and see how many I can find. Maybe I shall find them among the dead. Hear me, my chiefs. I am tired. My heart is sick and sad. From where the sun now stands, I will fight no more forever.


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 11:47 AM
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I'm not well-versed in such stories, CC. We're in minotte, though. (sp?)


Posted by: heebie-heebie | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 11:52 AM
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Due to he pause/play symbols I totally missed 99, so at first I thought 102 was CC's response to Wayne LaPierre's speech. Which seemed like an odd response.


Posted by: urple | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 11:57 AM
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Bork made a career providing intellectual cover for bad arguments. In exchange for intellectual honesty, he had a guaranteed audience. Glad I didn't fall into that one.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 12:02 PM
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With regard to the pishkun, I think you know as much as you need: huge herds, tricked by men in wolf suits into running fast, not knowing about the cliff, tumbling to their deaths, much feasting and celebrating, food, clothing, homes for the coming year, etc.


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 12:03 PM
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|| Sorry about that urple. |>


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 12:04 PM
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106: Cliff-crushed deer are the tenderest deer.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 12:07 PM
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108

I remember reading about those buffalo jumps in a Dave Barry column 20 years ago. Then nothing until right now.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 12:15 PM
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"Head-smashed-in Buffalo Jump," IIRC.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 12:16 PM
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110

Right, with the one hunter who wanted to see what it looked like from the bottom.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 12:21 PM
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111

But still we come back to the root cause of the problem being that our young people are are overly passive in the face of raw aggression. I'm thinking maybe something like a once-a-year competition where adolescents chosen from each state meet in a winner-take-all competition to the death. I know, a bit grisly, but think of the ratings and the salutary effect on the preparedness and morals of our young people.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 12:21 PM
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112

111: "You wait down here, and finish off the ones that are only wounded."


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 12:22 PM
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113

Best tweet yet on the NRA presser debacle (Josh Greenman (via Tom Tomorrow):

"THIS IS NOT THE DAY TO POLITICIZE THE NRA'S PRESS CONFERENCE."


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 12:38 PM
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"Maybe what the Mayans meant was that we have to listen John Boehner lie about deficit and watch LaPierre foam at the mouth."
-- Andrew Rosenthal


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 12:41 PM
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115

Maybe the URI prez will put out an "agonizing reappraisal" apology after today.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 12:42 PM
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116

A reappraisal tied to a stick.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 12:47 PM
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117

Now this *is* interesting and something I'd forgotten if I ever knew it in the first place. There was an armed guard at Columbine on the day of the shooting.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 12:47 PM
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118

Where the hell is everybody? (Moby doesn't count.) Are you motherfuckers off having quality time with your fucking families? Fuck that shit if you are.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 12:49 PM
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119

118: but he was outnumbered. LaPierre left it unstated but obviously at each school you have to have stationed at least as many gunmen as there are potential shooters.


Posted by: urple | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 12:52 PM
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118: This doesn't apply, though. When LaPierre says he wants armed guards, he means real men who will go in and take out the killers, not some guy who is going to take a few ineffectual shots from 60 yards away.


Posted by: politicalfootball | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 12:54 PM
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I'm still hard at work with only a brief break to go shopping and watch a delivery driver refuse to move his double-parked truck at the explicit instructions of a police officer. I might have shot the driver if I were armed as he was blocking a whole lane of a two lane street through a shopping district (Walnut Street). The officer called for backup instead of shooting.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 12:55 PM
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I'm at work. I decided to take a break from making bad arguments and do my job.

I was going to reply "Loser!" to 102, but my better angel wouldn't let me.


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 12:59 PM
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109: Here it is.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 1:06 PM
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124

When LaPierre says he wants armed guards, he means real men who will go in and take out the killers, not some guy who is going to take a few ineffectual shots from 60 yards away.

We need to have groups of husky teenagers rushing shooters and armed guards firing at them all at once. It's the only way to minimize the bloodshed.


Posted by: urple | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 1:08 PM
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125

125.2: There is another way -- nuclear weapons! Hurray!


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 1:09 PM
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126

"Run, you magnificent wheezy bastards. Run for all your worth while I draw a bead."


Posted by: Opinionated Armed Guard | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 1:13 PM
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I want all the schools to be ready to broadcast the theme music from Chariots of Fire over the PA to encourage the runners to maximum effort. And I think the music works well punctuated by shooting sounds. Hmm, but some might take it as an opportunity to do fake slow motion .. and then there's the screams of the wounded. Play it loudly I guess.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 1:25 PM
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126: If you outlaw nuclear weapons, only outlaws will have them.


Posted by: politicalfootball | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 1:26 PM
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This is cool. Except for the "fleeing" part.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 1:27 PM
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123: is a better angel like an elf on a shelf? I mean, available at retailers near me?


Posted by: Von Wafer | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 1:41 PM
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125 made me laugh. The fact that's nothing's going to change will make me cry.


Posted by: Von Wafer | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 1:43 PM
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69: Because as the shooter's mom can attest, there's nothing safer than guns in the home.

Also, reports suggest that she decided to pull him out of school and homeschool him instead.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 1:51 PM
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Best tweet yet on the NRA presser debacle

I haven't been following them, but I like:

RT @InvisibleObama: NRA: "The only way to fight obesity is with more cheeseburgers."

I also love the subheading on this article in the global post:

Responses to the NRA's press conference on Friday, just a week after the tragedy in Newtown, Connecticut which claimed the lives of 27 people, ranged from astounded to bemused to incoherent with rage.

Posted by: urple | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 1:56 PM
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RT @HarryBradyCU: Just heard the guy from #NRA on radio so i couldn't tell - from what he said i assume he was in a straight jacket in a padded cell

Posted by: urple | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 1:58 PM
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135

yay I got a card.


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 2:11 PM
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136

Congratulations, text!


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 2:11 PM
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If it weren't for violent videogames and television like The Walking Dead and Game of Thrones, America would never have suffered the tragedy of Erik Loomis calling for Wayne LaPierre's head on a stick.


Posted by: snarkout | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 2:14 PM
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Holy fuck, this day is in fact what the fucking Mayans were warning us about. And we've got almost all the nukes. Yee ha!


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 2:20 PM
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The NRA is a 501(c)(4) organization, so not obliged to disclose donors. But their largest donors should be proud of their work and eager to publicize the affiliation. Consider this a call for the NRA to publicly thank its most generous backers.


Posted by: lw | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 2:26 PM
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We always had cops on campus. I don't think they were armed

If they were cops they're likely armed. We have SRO's (School Resource Officers) at jr. highs and high schools but not elementary. We don't have metal detectors and all that and the SRO's wear a detective style uniform of a navy polo shirt and khaki pants.

When LaPierre says he wants armed guards, he means real men who will go in and take out the killers, not some guy who is going to take a few ineffectual shots from 60 yards away.

In his defense waiting for SWAT used to be the SOP and Columbine was a big factor in enlightening people to the fact that that tactic gets a shit ton of people killed in those situations. We had a an incident just before Columbine and two of our officers went in straightaway. The shooter's likely only alive because her co-worker tackled her while they were on the way up. The took flak for that call but time and other incidents like Columbine vindicated them. Not surprising really that one in particular would have good instincts seeing as his uncle also has a good reputation for tactics.


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 2:30 PM
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Tony Horwitz violates the analogy ban.


Posted by: Von Wafer | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 2:37 PM
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and watch a delivery driver refuse to move his double-parked truck at the explicit instructions of a police officer. I might have shot the driver if I were armed

Heh. IME they reconsider moving when you ask them how many deliveries are going to not be made after you arrest them and impound the truck. It's not just delivery drivers though. For some reason a certain percentage of the driving population has the mistaken notion that hazard lights are like some kind of magic talisman that once invoked exempts them from traffic laws or something.


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 2:39 PM
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143: one of my best friends from college is a cop in Boston. Every time he tells me about doing his job, I find myself thinking that, were I switch careers with him, I'd be likely to shoot a lot of people.


Posted by: Von Wafer | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 2:43 PM
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144: As a non-native, the idea that we had to take a test to get our driver's licenses changed from out-of-state was hilarious. This is the only place where I've had someone make a left turn in front of me from the right lane. We can't be worse!


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 2:44 PM
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There's a name for that.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 2:54 PM
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Where the hell is everybody?

I spent the first half of the day guarding this bank. I doubt they're coming back to that particular bank again but easy overtime is the path to surprising my wife with an iPad. People are kind of weird and kept thanking me for being there. I usually just shout America, fuck yeah! smile and nod but really dude, you're aware I'm getting paid? I'm only here because Apple products are expensive.


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 2:54 PM
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People are kind of weird and kept thanking me for being there. I usually just shout America, fuck yeah! smile and nod but really dude, you're aware I'm getting paid? I'm only here because Apple products are expensive.

This is hilarious.


Posted by: urple | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 2:58 PM
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Every time he tells me about doing his job, I find myself thinking that, were I switch careers with him, I'd be likely to shoot a lot of people.

Far and away the most stressful gig in this job is traffic control. It's hours of suppressing a near constant urge to murder.


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 2:59 PM
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I'm only here because Apple products are expensive.

Cries out the modern worker.


Posted by: Von Wafer | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 3:03 PM
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What I need is a wife that yearns for a Kindle.


Posted by: gswift | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 3:09 PM
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No metal detectors but there was a police officer assigned to my high school. I don't know if he was there all day or just in the area with regular check-ins. Around the time I graduated I think they were locking the fences around campus during class times, though one gate had to be open for visitors. There were some students and former students involved in shootings but I can think of only one incident that was actually on campus and it was a drive-by after school hours. I don't think anyone was killed. Still pretty bad, though.

No police at junior high that I can think of. There was a rumor that one kid got expelled for bringing a gun. I don't know if the gun part was true, but I know he never came back to that school.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 3:11 PM
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IPads really are lovely toys. I usually don't buy gadgets, but the one I got Buck a year and a half ago has been worth every exorbitant penny -- it doesn't sit idle for a day. (Admittedly, the children are probably slightly stupider than they would be without a convenient way to watch YouTube videos while slumped on the couch, but everything has a downside.)


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 3:12 PM
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there is one supernatural power i desperately want bestowed: instant vaporization of cars and trucks that obstruct buses, preferably also vaporizing all but the skivvies of any drivers/passengers. as this isn't going to happen, i would settle for next best, which would be something like impounding the vehicle, with swift removal by helicopter, and a 10,000 fine for obtaining its release + costs of the helicopter removal. why the city of san francisco hasn't enacted this as a huge revenue generator is beyond me.


Posted by: dairy queen | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 3:25 PM
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You know that press conference was what the NRA came up with after thinking about it for a week. I'm guessing that in the original version LaPierre just came out and shot all the reporters to prove the point.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 3:25 PM
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Whose idea was it to put Christmas right at the end of the goddamn calendar year? Didn't they realize that a lot of shit inevitably needs to get done by year-end, and that losing basically two full weeks to an assortment of vacation schedules would fuck up everyone's plans to do anything? Jesus Christ.


Posted by: urple | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 3:25 PM
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Urple answers his own question.


Posted by: Eggplant | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 3:29 PM
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143: My ex and I used to refer to hazard flashers as 'park anywhere lights.'


Posted by: togolosh | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 3:36 PM
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You know that press conference was what the NRA came up with after thinking about it for a week.

That's the amazing part. Every cultural reference they came up with as a more plausible cause of gun violence than guns was from the early Clinton administration. I'm surprised he didn't mention "Heather Has Two Mommies" and Murphy Brown and that chocolate yam vagina art woman.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 3:38 PM
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145: I once saw a taxi do that on Seventh Avenue in Manhattan. He did it just as the light changed red, but I think it was still the most insane traffic maneuver I've ever seen.


Posted by: Walt Someguy | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 3:45 PM
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151: My family has only Kindle-sized love for me. It only hurts a little.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 3:54 PM
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159: Reliving the glory days of Waco and Oklahoma City. The 2nd version of the press conference had him going on a screed against jack-booted thugs in the ATF.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 4:38 PM
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I believe that it's worth mentioning that in the film 2012 the president of the United States is black and then most of the world is destroyed.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 5:27 PM
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153: I didn't know that you could do that with an iPad? Hmm. That might actually make one worthwhile....


Posted by: urple | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 6:01 PM
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An entirely novel form of entertainment?


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 6:06 PM
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||
FG on twitter: "nice remarks about my book also I'd forgotten about great Unfogged "fuck you, clown" thread http://www.unfogged.com/archives/week_2012_12_16.html#012640 ..."
|>


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 6:18 PM
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Totally OT: Mara and I visited her mom last night, who is visibly not pregnant now and in a much better mental state than she seemed to be in early November. I have no idea whether she did have a baby she placed for adoption or what happened, but she's doing okay and gearing up for a depressing Christmas. And this is such good news for Lee and me, because I just can't find a way to make taking on a baby make sense now. So I guess we're off the hook and can focus on the two amazing girls we have.

Though since I'm on that topic, Mara had her occupational therapy/sensory evaluation today and that will be part of hwo we address her pica, by trying to find ways to redirect her desire to chew or eat. We'll also do some sort of psychological component. I know heebie-heebie at least was interested. I have so much respect for the local children's hospital and think we'll get great medical response, though I have no way of guessing to what extent it will work.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 8:51 PM
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I just want to say how awful a human being Bork must have been.


Posted by: Cosma Shalizi | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:11 PM
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I just want to say how awful a human being Bork must have been.


Posted by: Cosma Shalizi | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:11 PM
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Well go ahead, say it, enough preamble.


Posted by: Cryptic ned | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:13 PM
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167: Good news. I'm sure the pica will get better also.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:22 PM
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Maybe try to find a childrens hospital that keeps guns in every exam room. It doesn't help medically but it shows they care about kids.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:24 PM
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172: They initially recommended we give her gum but keep her from eating it, which we haven't really tried yet. She (and Nia, because life is sometimes fair) did get mechanical toothbrushes.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:33 PM
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168: How awful a human being must Bork have been?


Posted by: Benquo | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:38 PM
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I also realize 167.1 sounded heartless, but I'm trying to leave Mara's mom room to deal with stuff she doesn't share with me, though I think I hear more about her emotional state than most of her family does, which is in some ways weird. However she lost this baby, I imagine it will amplify the pain of her mother's death and that of her baby a decade ago, plus the day-to-day loss of the rest of her children. That must be such a tough way to live, and I don't mean to have my delght about not feeling I have to say no to a baby I partly want to seem more important than the sadness Mara's mom may have about what she's lost in life.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 12-21-12 9:39 PM
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dude, thorn, you're the most heart-ful of all the unfogged commenters. you're awesome. you don't need to reproach yourself, either for not wanting a newborn in the house or for not wanting to be the emotional repository for Mara's mom that her family has failed to provide. just keep on keeping on. and best of luck on the pica thing. I had a compulsive desire to eat ice for a while that neil the ethical werewolf suggested was due to anemia, and he was right! my brain was like, "fuck, eat rocks! I'm dying over here!" but ice is an acceptable food. where my dad lives in SC it's pretty common for black women to eat clay when they're pregnant; it's an acknowledged possibility. "you may feel like eating some clay." with the what now? but that's also organized in some fashion as to acquire clay that's non-toxic to eat.


Posted by: alameida | Link to this comment | 12-22-12 2:41 AM
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Everything al says in 176. Also, a load of animals self-medicate by eating clay (it helps get rid of toxins and parasites) so why not humans?

but really dude, you're aware I'm getting paid?

In contrast I've seen any number of people crossing picket lines express the belief that the strikers are getting paid by their union. They wish!


Posted by: chris y | Link to this comment | 12-22-12 3:37 AM
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176: I was put on a medication long ago that gave me a four-tray-a-day habit, so I do understand the compulsion, though Mara doesn't choose any of the traditional "foods" that are signals of a vitamin or mineral deficiency. Pica is complicated, though, since I think the non-food stuff has to also not be culturally appropriate, so it's not diagnosable pica for those women to eat clay because it's accepted within the culture, but it's pica for Mara to eat a box of raisins and then eat the box.

For Mara, it seems to be a combination of some genetic factor (I'd known her brother had done it, but her mom just said that she did too and I suppose there could be links to a predisposition to addiction, though I think talking like that tends to lead to hysteria too quickly) and her early lack of care teaching her to soothe herself in ways that aren't ideal. So if she's not totally calm at nap time at school, she'll lie down and start eating her blanket or pulling out her hair and eating it. And if it were just that we could probably manage it too, but there are other things she'll eat at other times that are unpredictable, and that's the scary part for me. But part of her occupational therapy will be about helping her learn to go to sleep by herself, which would be awesome.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 12-22-12 6:07 AM
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172 was an NRA-related joke about the need for constant protection, to go all Standpipe-y for a moment. 171 wasn't sarcasm in any way.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-22-12 7:17 AM
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Also, alameida!


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 12-22-12 7:21 AM
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172 was hilarious, Moby. I wasn't sure if 171 was supposed to be, but thanks.


Posted by: Thorn | Link to this comment | 12-22-12 8:10 AM
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176 is exactly right.


Posted by: x.trapnel | Link to this comment | 12-22-12 10:03 AM
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