I hadn't really imagined that my regular stops by unfogged and Tom & Lorenzo would ever converge
Why?
In the spirit of Christ and his love, let me say that was the least amusing thing ever.
2 to 1
The captions don't seem as strong this year, but the photos are hilarious (just going by part I). Miss USA is no longer a sexy transformer, she is now a sexy mylar balloon.
Those Tim and Lorenzo posts sound like they were written by someone who just read his first How To Be Snarky book.
The commentary was not amusing.
However, they were correct in calling Miss Albania's dress badass.
the captions were weak this year, although they improved a bit in the 3rd and 4th installments, posted after I e-mailed heebie. Honduras and Spain were definitely the best outfits.
Hm, I notice Miss Universe Canada didn't get a mention. I wonder if that's because she went the understated, tasteful route, unlike so many others?
Bwahahahahaha no.
(I've not honestly paid much attention to Miss Universe before now. I can see why it fascinates T&L so.)
We thought that was your national costume.
6 doesn't even read like attempted snark, though. (Neither, admittedly, do most of the captions, so I guess 9 is still appropriate.)
You'd think if you were going to do something like this you'd have at least a couple really good lines, something that gives a reason to keep going through the shitty lines—you've got to get to your gold, and the premise is that you caption them all, so … But that doesn't seem to be the case here, where there are (so far, in the first two posts anyway) no good lines.
It's almost as if the whole undertaking is a pro forma exercise whose real purpose is to all the T&L commenters to talk about the dresses.
Honduras and Spain were definitely the best outfits
It's like you didn't even see Austria.
You forgot Poland.
Is 17 supposed to go to more than just a picture? I mean, it's a fine picture.
Best thing on t & l ever was Florence Welch in an emerald green sequined gown, with dinosaur style spikes down the back. Heavenly.
And if it wasn't exactly like that I don't want to know. Memory better.
I will cop to smirking at the line about feeling pretty when drained of sinful colors, though Greece, to my eyes, had a more paradigmatic version of the sacrificial virgin look. Got CotT flashbacks.
13 is the best of all. Penis as totem or totem penis? It also reveals that there's a "Mrs. Universe" pageant, which Wiki reveals to be for the 25-45 set and hosted in Bulgaria. Apparently Canada does well in "Mrs." but not "Miss"' Universe.
Merry Christmas, and goodwill to all of you fuckfaces.
Further 17 context though.
Credit to them for knowing that lower DEFCON levels are more serious than higher.
The Bulgarians who run Mrs Universe also runs the Grandma Universe pageant.
Frankly, and I suppose this is sexist, the Grandma Universe contestants I have now Googled are not the most attractive, even by the standards of Grandmas. Truly not a legitimate measure of who is the world's sexiest Grandma.
Are the various Universe contests supposed to determine the sexiest contestant?
Am I the only one who, reading the post title, keeps wanting to put "rollin' in the Benz-o" after it?
Sex symbols of my youth who are now comfortably grandma age:
Madonna
Sharon Stone
Carrie Fisher
Rebecca De Mornay
Kim Basinger
Michelle Pfeiffer
Tawny Kitaen
Daryl Hannah
Nastassja Kinski
Kelly McGillis
Phoebe Cates
Heather Locklear
Jennifer Beals
Linda Fiorentino
33: Phoebe Cates is only 52! And Rebecca De Mornay is only 56!
33: average age of first child is about 25 y/o, I believe.
By "comfortable" I just meant: not a stretch
Apparently Rooney Mara is super goth.
Am I the only one who, reading the post title, keeps wanting to put "rollin' in the Benz-o" after it?
Not at all. I thought that's what it was referring to at first.
You know Gia Goodwin from Season 2, Veronica Mars? And from the movie. (Krysten Ritter, apparently) Somehow I always assume Rooney Mara is her, and then I'm always wrong.
I remember taking note ofthis dress* in the window of a shop in the Fillmore a couple of months ago.
* Technically the dress I noted had a different skirt half, but the bodice was the same.
(Except the bodice was actually monochrome.)
So really it was only a similar dress.
