After civilization collapses, couples with mismatched sleep schedules will have a definite advantage, since one person can stand guard against the roving Road Warrior style gangs while the other sleeps.
If you think a single couple stands a chance against the Lord Humungus, then buddy, you ought to think again.
"Sgt Colon attributed his twenty years of happy marriage to the fact that he worked all night and Mrs Colon worked all day. They communicated by means of notes left in the kitchen. They even had three children, the result, Vimes assumed, of particularly persuasive handwriting."
2: He can't turn his head! All you have to do is strafe to one side while taking advantage of the rocket launcher's splash damage! We've been stuck on this level for three hours!
I picture 4 being delivered in the small hours of the morning by an exasperated Flippanter to an equally exasperated spouse.
It's socially hard to duck out, even when your day is longer. My workday starts at 7:30, while my wife's starts at 10 or 11. But it's hard to end together time and suggest heading to bed at 10.
Part of the compromise is for her to join me in going to bed relatively early, then stay up reading or playing games on her phone while I drift off. There are nights when she tells me she's not tired and I head to bed solo; she usually grabs her blanket for the couch, so she can just lay down when she finishes video gaming.
Or, if it's always after taco night, gassy.
You've got to write that relationship book, Moby.
CREATE JOIN GRANT DROP: The SQL guide to relationships
"Hickenetics: The Modern Science of Relationships."
NMM to my most recent relationship. You can shower me with pity and praise in this thread, which is not otherwise in use.
I'm very sorry about your most recent relationship. Not that I ever knew it existed before this.
Sorry or congratulations as appropriate, Neb.
I just yawned so hard I ripped my shirt.
12: Condolences. Did you have matching sleep schedules? If so, you can blame that.
Sorry, neb. But now you don't have to share your latest concoctions, at least!
I just yawned so hard I ripped my shirt.
HULK NAP!
"Don't make me lethargic. You wouldn't like me when I'm lethargic."
NMM to my most recent relationship.
This seems completely backwards.
The mismatching of sleep schedules reminded me (on a smaller scale) of Patrick O'Brian's observation of "sailors being excellent husbands, often away and handy about the house when ashore."
20: It is, but I was trying to make you feel better or something. Gluttony is its own reward is all I'm saying. (The same can be said for breakups, but I don't want to generalize from mine to yours.)
It wasn't fruitcake-related, was it?
You're too good for her, neb.
10 is brilliant.
21: heebie gets a prize.
Gluttony is its own reward is all I'm saying.
I engaged in some apparently proleptic retail therapy earlier in the month, anyway.
I'm sorry, nosflow. Hope you're doing okay. What did you buy for yourself?
28: Are you thanking me for making that explicit? I genuinely feel like I'm losing my edge.
Also sorry about the MM.
30: nah I was just wondering who would be the first to make that joke, which only occurred to me after I made the comment.
What did you buy for yourself?
I started to write it out and then I got embarrassed because it's so much stuff. :/
I got, let's see, a primitive antique table to use as a tv stand, some relatively fancy face lotion, new shoes with a cheery Liberty of London print on them. And that's not counting books or anything, two bags of used books Friday to get me through the weekend. I'll bet your choices are better!
The items are either garments or footwear or the items are all both garments and footwear combined?
I suppose that depends on whether or not you consider footwear to be garments in their own right.
Actually, I take that back. It doesn't depend on that.
I'm just trying to make people form a mental picture of you in footie pajamas.
I wouldn't have had to get the face lotion if the fools who live here hadn't decided to empty everything I own into the bathtub to make potions. The table was just to feel like I'm doing something about the house. Garments would be more fun and oh in fact I bought a pair of jeans although it turns out that like always it's not going to fit as well as I'd hoped. (I did sew a skirt this weekend, which probably counts.)
This is all just to say that I'm months and months out and still indulging. You should absolutely wrap yourself in finest whatever and enjoy what you can.
I'm not even post-break-up and I'm indulging.
NMM to a certain fellowship I put in for this fall for early career special collections librarians. And bummed to find out via twitter instead of email.
Since we're past 40 comments, I'll note that this group formed to oppose the armed idiots in Oregon sounds pretty great. I like the acronym especially.
43 Sounds good. I was thinking of sending a dildo but since it's getting pretty cold there maybe a gimp suit would be better appreciated.
Because if there's any time to go full dildo+gimp suit, its right after a bad breakup.
Turn those lemons into lemonade, inside your gimp suit.
Only if he says it will make him feel better.
48: this was actually, far from being a bad breakup, the nicest and kindest breakup I've ever been a party to (for which I can claim no credit). It's still sad though!
Condolences on the breakup. Maybe new shoes?
Whoops, 52 are only sold in Women's sizes, maybe this instead?
Am I correctly recalling that one of the many evangelical minister sex scandals was a guy found dead in two wetsuits? There may also have been dildos involved.
In any case, Neb, don't do that.
That is not how I would choose to spend $1000 on a single pair of shoes.
You can buy wetsuits without feet coverings.
55.1 turns out to be very easy to google and correct in the essentials.
Condolences, neb. She'll regret this! To the OP, the beginning of the end of my marriage was my newly-wed wife's admission that she'd been taking sleeping pills in order to accommodate my desire to sleep, you know, together, like snuggled up, and that otherwise she couldn't tolerate being touched while sleeping. At that point, synchronized sleep schedules seemed kind of pointless, and so it went.
I have a great deal of difficulty falling asleep touching another person. Maybe I should meet your ex-wife, Jesus?
"Sleeping together" is just an expression. You were taking it way too seriously.
Getting a tattoo of an ancient healing symbol is a time-honored way to minister afflictions like those referred to by 60 or by 61. Heebie might like these also.
I would worry about how that kind of a tattoo would age. That's a lot of detail and any small amount of sagging skin would make it look off.
61: I'll happily pass on her contact info. Remember that adolescent daughters are part of the package.
How do people sleep together without touching? The rules are that you go to bed, you have sex, you sleep wrapped up in each other, you wake up, you have sex again. Seriously, how hard is that to understand?
65.2: Since you are Jesus, I guess you do get to make up the rules.
How do people sleep together without touching?
They may call it a "twin mattress", but it's not for two people.
How do people sleep together without touching?
Cats who like to sleep between their humans.
65.2: I believe "sword between you" is the conventional answer.
Sorry, neb. But now you can help write Moby's relationship guide! #brightside
(70 intended to have to do with the surplus of free time, not the termination in se.)
My wife and I both can't stand touching another person while sleeping. I don't even know how it would work. If the other person moves or does anything, you wake up. That's not good. I would have to take sleeping pills if married to a JMcQ-type person I guess.
This is one sort of compatibility that gets ignored but is very important.
So far as I know, Hitler liked to snuggle Eva as he fell asleep.
Until we can know for certain that he didn't, we best not take the chance of trying it ourselves.
It was when my last marriage progressed to the point of being unable to touch each other while awake that I realised there was a problem
Sometimes when we touch, the honest's too much.
I have to turn my head and cry.
Manny Pacquiao has recorded a version of that song. And I'm not making that up.
"Annabel Lee" is about an extreme case of keeping compatibility alive.
My dog cured me of my inability to sleep while in close contact. Between him and my cats my unconscious mind has mastered the delicate balance of gently maneuvering around tiny, delicate creatures and fighting with all my strength for bed space.
My wife and I both can't stand touching another person while sleeping
The real questions: how does this other person feel about being touched while sleeping, and what's he or she doing sleeping with you and your wife?
I don't mind cuddling with kittens while I sleep, but one of the new ones is a face-licker. Like he goes on a tear, not just an isolated lick. I can't sleep through that.
I want to make an appropriate in context, but also inappropriate, caulk joke on a friend's social media post and I just can't do it.