Was the punch for the resemblance, or because the puncher mistook the punchee for Shia? (I will now read the article.)
That doesn't seem as defensible as the latter.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say that it is morally and legally indefensible to hit somebody because they look like Shia LaBeouf when you know they are not Shia LaBeouf.
Is it morally or legally defensible to hit Shia LaBeouf?
Well, he doesn't look like Shia LeBoeuef now because one of them's got a black eye and the other one hasn't.
4: Maybe he thinks facial-uniqueness is protected intellectual property. Hence 7 as the remedy.
If it is wrong to hit somebody for being Shia LaBeouf, it is wrong to hit somebody just for looking like Shia LaBeouf. Even if it is right to hit somebody for being Shia LaBeouf, it is wrong to hit somebody for looking like Shia LaBeouf. If it is right to hit somebody for being Shia LaBeouf, it may or may not be wrong to hit somebody who you mistakenly thing is Shia LaBeouf, but probably is because you have to exercise some care.
8 might work, but only if the guy doing the hitting was Shia LaBeouf or Shia LaBeouf's lawyer.
Is it morally or legally defensible to hit Shia LaBeouf?
Probably depends if you're running for your life from actual cannibal Shia LaBeouf.
Having googled Shia LaBeouf, I endorse 4, but I have to say that not punching out the man himself would take a lot of self restraint,
I feel old, but I don't know who Shia LeBoeuf is other than someone my kids use as a punch line. Actor? I mean, I could google, and will, I just wanted to admit ignorance.
Then I think that you really shouldn't punch somebody even for being Shia LaBeouf. The odds of mistaken identity are too high.
This song is my only preexisting association with him.
I think 14 can be defended consequentialist or deontological grounds.
Is it morally or legally defensible to hit Shia LaBeouf?
Yes. He pronounces his first name wrong. He spells his last name wrong. Fuck that guy.
Is it morally or legally defensible to hit Shia LaBeouf?
The real question it seems to me is whether it's morally obligatory to hit Shia LaBeouf.
Shia LaBoeuf is not one to shy from taking punishment. Least of all from being himself.
17: He does have an admirable ability to make good pseuds, though. Sunni LeMouton. Sufi LePoulet.
Sufi LePoulet is my secret superkoranic porn name.
In the end, isn't Shia LaBoeuf really Disney's fault?
Sunni LeMouton. Sufi LePoulet.
Dervish Crevette! Actually that sounds like a Washington law firm.
Who are you people? Punching Shia LeBeouf is a moral duty of such weight that punching lookalike Shia LeBeouf is thereby justified.
We're people who base morals on sound deontological grounds that exclude mere physical similarity as a morally relevant criteria.
People who don't know anything about Shia LeBoeuf? I mean, I googled enough to pin down that he's an actor, but is he particularly loathsome, or are we just supposed to dislike his face?
And what Moby said. Not that I knew all of the words, but it sounded good.
I think he's an actor/plagiarist/bully of people who get upset that he plagiarized them.
25 meet 19, and I can't believe we didn't discuss the incident in 20. Probably griping about our 401k's or colonoscopies that week instead.
He also had a pretty extreme public breakdown. At one point he had, uh, office hours/semi-public-shamings so that you could give bagheaded Shia a piece of your mind.
Which I guess is just performance art that assumes that he is a priori loathsome.
Near as I can tell, Shia LeBoeuf is some stupid millennial thing not actually worth giving a crap about.
It's really hard to defend performance art and repeated plagiarism, but, while you can't walk a mile in his shoes, you can* watch an episode of Even Stevens to see what he had to experience at a very young age.
* Don't watch an episode of Even Stevens.
Actually, I kind of like the plagiarized apologies. He's probably still a terrible person, but that bit amused me.
Speaking of very bad apologies, Hastert got 15 months in prison.
According to the linked piece in 33, Shia LeBoeuf at least agrees that Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull was disappointing. So that's one point in his favor.
You have to do some interpretative work with the link in 33, and imagine it playing it over several years, during which you keep having occasion to say, "That dude, again?" And then you get an idea of why this man was punched.
I'd forgotten about the run around that museum.
Would it be wrong to throw a fat man onto Shia LeBoeuf, thereby causing Shia LeBoeuf to fall onto a larger number of people who happened to be standing on train tracks?
I don't understand why people hate him, but I'm glad it produced 15.
I want to fight with someone on the internet but not about Shia LaBoeuf, so this blog is worthless to me right now.
SORRY I spelled his name wrong. See, no fighting!
Is there a specific topic you do want to fight about, or only specific topics you don't want to fight about?
Great. Just perpetuate the "mindlessly violent librarian" stereotype.
48: Moby, did you confuse me and Thorn again?
You want a piece of me too, peep?
No topic. I'm just an angry emotional mess and catharsis through doing the busywork portions of my fucking job doesn't seem to be what I'm looking for.
I think he meant Barry, peep, but I'm sure you librarians all look alike.
53 is right, but I'm going to argue against it anyway.
I just purchased a shirt because I had $40 and a strong desire to look at little like a sweaty wreck as possible when I go hiking. It was sort of cathartic.
Ooh, I bought shirts that are supposed to arrive today. That might make me happier! Or I could go home and cry and look at my kittens. That, too, would probably work.
Do your shirts have mesh vents in the pits?
I bought some pants that are supposed to arrive today!
They do not, but that's actually a point in their favor. And they're two different sizes, so presumably at least one will fit.
OT: Why does every company (i) use Taleo's incredibly crappy online application forms but (ii) a new, different and buggier application for video interviews?
I don't know. How many of your shirts have vented arm pits?
Wow, this is going to be the best-dressed least sweaty blog in the entire blogosphere!
None of my shirts have vented armpits, unless just plain being sleeveless shirts counts.
Vented arm pits do not make for best-dressed.
There are no vented armpits in foxholes.
Thanks for cheering me up, guys. You're the best.
65: I think that's wrong. A quick google search shows several military uniforms with armpit vents.
I mean, as much as I ever could. I don't really want to be mean to people who are being stupid just to make myself feel better, so I'm fighting that temptation by making myself be here in the comments threads where I won't.
Armpits are like assholes, everyone's vents.
70: Maybe you need to go to library school so you can learn to be mindlessly violent like Barry and me.
72: You don't think I could manage a freelance version? A couple years of school seems like a big investment when I could be ripping someone's shins off now.
60: Good lord do I feel you on the Taleo.
Of course, it can be worse--I applied for a job this week that essentially made me reenter my resume along with what I liked about each job, what I didn't like about it, and why I left, in a fucking PDF where the form fields resized the text so whatever amount of text you entered fit! Then I had to save the PDF and e-mail it, along with the resume that I had just re-entered, to hr@xyz.com. So fucking lame. So many damn hoops for what should be a relatively simple process.
And then you never know whether to attach your cock pic in a separate jpg file or put it in that pdf.
75: Do they really think they're entitled to a straight answer about how much you were paid at each job and how much you expect to be paid if offered this job? Come on, assholes.
To be unbearably earnest after being unbearably belligerent, I got home to a kitten who'd died and I'm really grateful I was already in a better mood thanks to the Fightin' Librarians and friends. I know my life has been one big sequence of annoying sucky things I've complained about for the last, well, ever but especially the last year and I'm so appreciative of the support and friendship I get here anyway.
Very sorry to hear about the kitten. I hope the girls (and you!) take it OK.
I got home to a kitten who'd died
Ugh. That sucks.
If you need some distracting entertainment, I volunteer to pick a fight with RT by claiming that if Clinton wins the primary, all real progressives have an obligation to vote for Trump.
The girls are ok so far. I let them see the body because they all chose to and we talked about runts and why some people believe in heaven. I buried it deep in the front garden and we'll choose a shrub to plant over it in memory this weekend. I think it went about as well as it could. I freaked out and blamed myself at first, but got over that much faster than I do for mundane things.
It could also be a good way to introduce the kids to Stephen King if you have a copy of Pet Sematary around.
Indeed I do not and Uncle Moby had better not send one.
82.last is hilarious.
A friend* expressed surprise that I'd vote HRC, and it was hard to explain to her that it was basically because the Bernie fans here have been so insufferable.
[insert winking emoji here]
*in fact, My Greatest Regret, recently re-linked here
Just because it's hilarious, current headline in the local paper:
15 CMU illnesses linked to campus cafe
Oh man, looking at the story, it was a remote food cart in a Brutalist academic building, from one of the best cafes in the city. Not the cafeteria-related hijinks I'd imagined.
Oh no! I'm so sorry about the kitten.
When I was about 5 a cat gave birth at the foot of my bed.. actually on my bed. When I was 6 I accidentally killed two kittens that were sleeping in my bed. I guess I rolled on to them
Oh dear, Prez. That sounds like it would have been upsetting at the time at least. I've been keeping all the cat stuff physically quarantined from the children to try to avoid that. They don't seem to be taking on any internal blame, nor of course do they deserve any. The world is just like this.
Given how cats smoother so many babies, it was probably just some kind of innate defensive reaction that your reptile brain did on its own.
"Who are you, kitty? Are you Treadstone?"
The girls got to sleep okay. The remaining kitten seems to be nursing and the mother is in good spirits and eating up a storm.
That sounds terrible Thorn. Glad we cheered you up some before.
Thanks, Barry and all. I'm incredibly paranoid about little (but bigger!) Zamzam at home without me today, but what can I do?
I'm pretty sure the odds for continued well being go up pretty sharply after the first day or two. Especially with one kitty getting all of the milk. I wouldn't worry about Zamzam.
Just leave the TV on ABC so Zamzam call tell me what is happening on Live! with Kelly and Michael.
What a damned thing to happen. But if Zamzam is the bigger kitten, I'm pretty sure she? he? will be ok.
Moby, it can't tell you that, its eyes won't be open yet.
It's a chat show. You don't need to see.
Zamzam is by far the bigger of the two and had gotten the bulk of the maternal affection. No sex known yet and I'm mostly using "it" because there's no preferred pronoun expressed either. And in the breakup I lost not only a worthless partner but her bedroom tv, so win-win and thus no daytime chat shows.
(Zamzam is a pseud but also what I'm calling the kitten in real life. Obviously it invites the evil eye, but the church I take the girls to is of the name-and-claim sort, so I'm fine with asking for miracles. Selah chose the real name pre-birth.)
102: Cats are pretty Thatcherite in some respects.
You should have had a kitten-pyre, so you could be amused when the pastor gets some awkard questions in future. Happiness needs long-term plannning.
I actually haven't successfully made them go to church in months, since they don't like it and I'm not a believer. I probably should pick up the slack again at some point, but it's one more thing when much of my life feels like one more thing. Still, I could try to scandalize the pastor on facebook! She's pretty easygoing and tolerant of me, though.
If you're aiming to make them godless heathens make them keep going. The boredom will turn them right off.
Because of viral videos of years past, I now have Led Zeppelin's "Immigrant Song" in my head.
That is sort of my goal, yes. There are other pieces too. But right now Nia hates the sermons and Mara hates the loudness of the music and Selah is really supposed to be taking a nap during the middle of it, so it's really easy to make excuses not to go.
Try as I will I can't see how 106.2 follows from 106.1.
I think Thorn mentioned something about the importance of churches in black communities?
Anyway, I still vote heathen.
Chris, it's about culture and having them grow up so that it's unremarkable rather than batshit to see people speaking in tongues, even if they do indeed then decide it's batshit/put-on. It's the only place in their lives where other black kids with queer parents are in the majority, where most of the other families have been broken up and reconstituted because of drugs and absent parents and foster care and poverty. It really does create a shared language with their families that could be important down the line and has been helpful for me. Plus I was raised Catholic and so doing things that really bother me but are arguably for a good cause is up my alley. And the girls are supposed to be quiet, which is nice, and during the sermons I can translate the Greek for the verses they're using and complain in my head about the wordings they prefer. So much amateur ethnography to do. And the people there are genuinely nice and good people. I push the boundaries of the world they know as well as vice versa.
It was extremely satisfying when the associate pastor's wife, who'd called me a satanist and told me not to even look at her kids after I outed myself as an atheist, had to come back groveling and ask me to help her oldest prepare for the ACT. I'd like to think some Very Important Lessons were learned, but probably not.
That's one advantage of the celebrate clergy that very few people mention.
At the seder my brother had an opportunity to tell a favorite story about his son.
Long ago when my nephew was maybe 6 -7 years old he was getting very hungry and impatient at the seder.
Son: When are we going to eat? I'm starving!
Dad: When we're done.
Son: Why do we do all this anyway?
Dad: I want you to learn about religion.
Son: I hate religion!
Dad: You're learning!
113: Everyone know the devil is good at standardized tests.
"Why is this night different from all other nights?"
"Worse bread, more open self-hatred."
You should give them a bunch of sample questions to work on, all of which prominently feature Satan.
Right, but the point is to prove I'm morally better than they are. (Which is an amazingly low bar, but whatever.)
115 is great.
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In the airport once again and flying to see Chani for the weekend. This time to another Emirate though.
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119 - But as a Satanist you're free to gloat as much as you want!
Again with the fucking unattended baggage in this airport. They should call out EOD on some of these fuckers. Maybe if people start losing their bags because of their idiocy this will stop.
Every fucking time in the line to passport control. Pisses me off no end. Gigantic fucking backpack.
So take one. They're all full of single malt and falcons, right?
125 is right. Unless they cut off your hand.
The idea has occurred. Either that or chuck it out of the line. I'll probably just in effectually complain on Twitter.
I would but I forgot to bring hand sanitizer.
I would but I forgot to bring hand sanitizer.
If you steal the single malt first you could use that and pee too. Win-win-win.
If you steal the single malt first you could use that and pee too. Win-win-win.
Fucking autocorrect out a space in there. Also changed gate to fate in a text of mine and just did it from fate to date. It means to drive me mad. Self-driving card my ads. Get this right fuckers.
Out s/b added.
Also: ass ass ASS!
The bots clearly do protect one anothers' reputations though.
126. They don't do that here. Just fine you a million fucking quatloos then throw your ass in debtor's prison when you can't pay.
Zamzam seems healthy and happy. I'm about ready to pass out from fear of how I'd deal with a repeat of yesterday, but I'll get better after managing dinner and homework and going to the park and so on.
121: (adopts dodgy French-pretending-to-be-Scottish or Scottish-pretending-to-be-Spanish accent, draws sword)
There can be only one!
First you get punched in the eye, and then this!
141 was funny. I never noticed it before.