I'd find them and put them in a folder labeled "Swiss Bank Information."
It's ok, it's not like kids today know what "negatives" are.
I have a definite opinion that LB is right on all counts. However, if PB is anything like me, the answer to "How many places could you possibly have old negatives stored?" is "As many as you can think of, plus a few more".
Every part of 3 rings true for me.
When I'm trying find something I've misplaced, my method is to ask myself what is the absolutely stupidest and most unlikely place I could have put it. This rarely works, but when (as happens occasionally) the objects do reappear, they are in even stupider and more unlikely places.
Canonically, you send them to me. Also, sorry about your ex, bio.
I found tasteful nudes of my mother when cleaning through her stuff after her death. It did not traumatize me.
Otoh, I also did not save those pictures (unlike most old family photos). So the pictures are now lost to history. Unless someone bought them at the estate clearance sale and has now uploaded them to some dark corner of the Internet, in which case they will live on forever. Neither of those possible outcomes bothers me, but if either of those outcomes would bother you, then maybe you should try to find them.
I've seen a tasteful nude of my mom when she was super duper pregnant. The canonical kind, with hair covering the nipples and the nether regions out of site. It was not traumatizing.
Nipple hair is canonical in pregnancy?
It's less glamorous than you might have been led to believe.
I've never thought of nipple hair as being particularly glamorous. OTOH, Rule 34...
Post them to the flickr pool so we can decide how traumatizing they are likely to be.
11: Even if it's been set and permed?
Surely 12 is more canonical than 5.
I'm not even sure that the nudes I found of my mother were all that tasteful. Remind me again where exactly is the line between tasteful and non-tasteful nudes?
Thank you. I can probably find them at the expense of kicking up clouds of dust and so sneezing for some time. I'll try that later and see if I'm remembering them correctly. If there's nothing that will have daughter going "Ewww! Daddyyyy!" I'll leave them after I put up a few in the Flickr pool (if someone will send me the access info).
The Ex and I had long ago had together given and received a bunch of apologies and acceptances for real and imaginary offenses and gotten along very well for many years. I will miss her.
Remind me again where exactly is the line between tasteful and non-tasteful nudes?
If the props are tacky.
16: It's a fuzzy line. If the fuzz is over sexual organs and activities it's tasteful. If it's covered in chocolate syrup it's also tasteful. Leather sometimes qualifies.
17: My condolences to you and your kids.
17.1 Hooray!*
*Also canonical.
---
And my condolences.
Remind me again where exactly is the line between tasteful and non-tasteful nudes?
18 years.
Condolences. No reason I can see not to keep the nudes.
22: Because every 18 years fashions in pubic hair change, so that what was tasteful becomes horrifying.
Exactly. 90s pubes look totally dated. What are you, Seinfeld?
If it makes you feel better, in my father's stuff we found a naked oil pastel portrait of an ex girlfriend he had done. It wasn't all that traumatizing to any of us. My mother gave it to my sister as a gift, and I think my sister promptly got rid of it. Come to think of it, I think my sister was a little traumatized, but it was outweighed by how humorous my brother and I found the situation.*
*My sister has a very overdeveloped sense of propriety.
Obviously nude oil pastel portraits are more traumatizing than nude photographs.
Least traumatizing of all: Airbrushed on the side of van.
Highly traumatizing: Airbrushed on the inside of a van.
Keep, but for a reason no one here has articulated: when I was a teenager I found the (not remotely tasteful) dirty letters my dad wrote my mom when they were in college. I never took him seriously again, which was developmentally important.
I was tasked with deciding what to take from my parents now-sold summer home. One item was an abstract nude self-portrait by my brother's then wife, now 30 years an ex.
Left for the new owners.
31: It's too late for found stuff therapy. My "kids" are older than a great many of the Unfoggetariat and they take only my techie advice seriously.
I found some contact sheets. I remembered correctly, there's nothing that would interest Larry Flynt or late night cable. I'll leave them, the kids can giggle at my artistic pretensions and marvel at the once upon a time hotness of their mother.
The question has now been settled by the subject herself. The kids told me they had found a box of nekkid shots she had stashed away since the Seventies.
Some giggles, no trauma.
That sounds like a fantastic outcome! I'm glad you're all able to connect kindly to warm memories of her.
Stabby is the best of all commenters. Long may she procrastinate.
Stabby is great, no doubt. But how familiar are you really with urple's oeuvre?
Now, now. I don't think it's really fair to make people choose between Stabby and Urple, both of whom are fantastic commenters.
I confess to a certain presentist bias with regard to Urple. Even in my own short time, though, Stabby's average quality has certainly been higher, even if Urple occasionally scales higher heights.
All unfogged commenters are above average.
Stabby might win the "which unfogged commenter should legally change their name to their pseud" contest, though.
Obviously there has to be a men's division and a women's division, but I don't want to have to get into how many of urple's highlights might be disqualified under doping restrictions.
I'd be more concerned about the commenting-while-sober allegations, myself.
41. Urple's drunk commenting under a previous pseud was, of course, the stuff of legends, and if there are doping restrictions they should certainly be waived in his case for the public good. AIMHMHB, for many years I assumed that Urple was a joint pseud shared by two guys called Ed and Lou, but I'm now convinced he exists, and the world is a better place for knowing that.
40. I'm currently assuming that CS is her real name.
How did I miss urple's previous pseud? Can someone help me?
I think it would be bad to link the new with the old like that on the open blog.
44: A character in a fictional porn movie that shares a last name with a famous advice columnist
You guys are the SWEETEST and guess what I don't have the kids this weekend so don't need to practice what I preach re screentime, watch out. But get real, I am at best a pebble at the base of the mountain that is urple. And let's agree that this is my real name and that my OTHER name is a pseudonym. (Thorn knows it, it's totally quotidian in English though in French the last name is a bit dirty.)
49 is a good guess; same effect. Some ex-family-in-law members insist it takes "Du" which does not, I think, produce the aristocratic effect they hope it does.
Thank you! I'd missed the change and imagined him as two very different people.
I hope for his sake he's two very different people.
I had wondered what had happened to the other guy.
Of course! How could I have thought that was two people!
In case anyone's puzzled by the sequence of events, Urple both pre and post dated the 'other' guy.
I never understand when things get into "multiverse" territory.
Has anyone ever seen urple and Ray Cyst in the same room at the same time?
34: The question has now been settled by the subject herself.
Oh, good. The last time something like this came up in my own life, 'twas after my mom died, and my brother and I, having gone through all her stuff, found ourselves discussing what each of us should be prepared for whenever one or the other of us died first.
My brother noted that I should be aware that I'd find some ... paraphernalia .. like, um, sex toys, in the back of the bedroom closet. Pfff, I said. Like I'd care.
Discussing beforehand seems helpful!
I used to regularly torch my personal email archives because God forbid anything happened to me, there wasn't a person on this earth, my own parents included, who would have remembered me fondly if they spent any time in that venal universe. My current approach is to just THINK terrible gossipy things but not put them in writing.
This conversation has had me musing on how I'd feel if my kid (as a teen or adult) came across naked pictures of me taken by or for my ex or my boyfriend. If such pictures existed of course. The answer is "affirmatively pleased." I believe it's super healthy for kids to (1) be raised by people who are totally hot for each other and to (2) be made aware that they are, or were, raised by such people. Even if they think they'd rather claw their own eyes out.
Thought experiment! A malevolent demon has banished you to an empty desert island. You get a choice of reading material: a year's free subscription the The National Review, or the entire oeuvre of the Victorians from Port Angeles (blog & books). Which do you pick?
I'd hate-read the Victorians to the end of time you don't even need to put me on a desert island.
62
Hate reading is fun, but if they were your only source of reading material? I think I would go insane if I had to read book-length drivel by that couple.
61 Now where did I put my pince-nez?
After surviving the letters described in 31 I'm pretty sure nothing written could tip me into insanity, my answer remains the same.
Victorians in a second. I could spend my time plotting their downfall.
(I already did this a little. Not so much plot as imagine them attempting to indignantly report a richly deserved mugging to the constabulary. "We have been set upon by blackguards!" etc. In my head they talk like Sir Digby Chicken Caesar.)
59.2: He means a full-sized Wonder Woman doll.
59: & 60: I'm glad she saved them and the kids found them. Memories of happier times are always good to have in reserve.
60.2 is a fervently held belief but I always feel the need to clarify that I PROMISE I DON'T MEAN IT IN AN AYALETTE WALDMAN WAY.
No, no, you were entirely non-creepy about it. And I don't feel shamed about exposing my kids to the weird non-relationship Lee and I had, but it's nice to think of other families having good versions.
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Perhaps foolishly I am meeting with the big boss to discuss why I was singled out for downgrading in my annual review.
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May his knife chip and shatter.
Seconding 74 and 75, and wishing that I'd thought of 74
Thanks. And 74 is nicely apt.
While I did some pushback I'm afraid I let myself get sidetracked. The boss fairly easily diverted me on to what is expected of me for this coming year and I failed to hit one of my main points. I guess that's why she is the big boss. I feel like a total sap.
"It was, he thought, like having one's head pushed through mush."
Did you get anything out of her? Even if not why you specifically, an explicit statement that it's not a real review of your actual performance?
79 I guess. She said she felt bad about it FWIW. And acknowledged at one point that I probably did actually deserve an exceeds expectation rating rather than the needs improvement one. What a shitshow. I'm kind of even more demoralized realizing that she used it to set parameters for my performance for the coming year. Not that they are unreasonable ones but still. I even pointed out that she used one of the items that we acquired because I found it and pushed hard for it as a highlight point in one of our all staff meetings.
Seriously though, good luck Barry. And if Lady Fenring was talking about the next year your job is at least secure for the moment, yes?
It is, better yet my immediate boss was replaced (sorry to see him go) and new boss came in (who was previous boss here before my time) and likes me and what I do AIMHMHB, and my language expertise too. So we'll see but I'm miffed.
Catching up, Barry, I'm sorry you didn't get all you want and that there wasn't recognition of just how ridiculous this is, but it does sound like some positive conversation came out of it. I hope you're headed into a better year.
If your low review is the basis for next year, does that mean you just have to improve on the supposedly weak performance (easy!) or make up for it by accomplishing what you were supposed to last year as well as this year (hard!)
84 I think I might be set up to be screwed either way. I was close to an exceeds and thought I should have had it but the directive came from way on high to fit everyone to an even more unforgiving bell curve so two in my section were dropped from meets to needs improvement (including me) and one was dropped to unsatisfactory (I'm glad I'm not that dude). It was pretty much arbitrary and done by the main director who is far removed from my section and not very familiar with my work.
I have an opportunity to meet again but this time I need to stay on point, but not belabor it too much I think.
I must not wander.
Wandering is the meeting killer, the little-death that brings total confusion.
When the wandering has gone past I will turn the inner eye to follow its path.
Where the wandering has gone there will be nothing.
Only the point will remain.
Got to run, my sandworm approaches.