Re: Friday WTgatory

1

I wonder what meth would do for the local raccoon population?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 6:25 AM
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2

Amateurs.


Posted by: Mossy Character | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 6:32 AM
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3

if it made it far enough we could create meth-gators in Shoal Creek and the Tennessee River down in North Alabama. They've had enough methed up animals the past few weeks without our help

I have a question.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 7:00 AM
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4

If not now, when? If not us, who?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 7:06 AM
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5

Anyway, we're up to four alligators found in the Pittsburgh area this year.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 7:16 AM
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6

Swimming upstream or what?


Posted by: Mossy Character | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 7:31 AM
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7

Pet owners who suck.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 7:35 AM
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8

In a grocery store parking lot, among other places. Come Easter every little boy and girl wants a cute tiny little gator, but within a month or two they lose interest and their beleaguered parents just let it out to pasture.


Posted by: dalriata | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 7:36 AM
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9

Is that the same store where everyone keeps getting shot?


Posted by: Mossy Character | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 7:37 AM
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10

No. And that was just the once.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 7:44 AM
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11

Same chain, different store. This is out in the suburbs, the constant-drive-by-shooting-and-people-driving-on-the-roof store is in town.


Posted by: dalriata | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 7:44 AM
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12

"Alligator Captured In Giant Eagle Parking Lot"


-- The giant eagle parking lot is for loading and unloading giant eagles only. There is no alligator parking in the giant eagle parking lot.
-- No, the giant eagle parking lot is for loading and unloading alligators.
-- Oh, really, Vernon. Why pretend? We both know what this is about. You want me to get a hippopotamus.


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 7:46 AM
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13

Giant eagles:
https://www.oglaf.com/ornithology/


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 7:47 AM
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14

I'm going to assume I shouldn't open that at work.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 7:53 AM
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15

13: My net nanny blocked that website. Is it really something pornographic?

(I don't expect that kind of thing from ajay)


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 7:55 AM
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14: More evidence if any was needed - Moby is smarter than me.


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 7:56 AM
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17

There was a Big Bear down the street from me, but then it was swallowed whole by a Giant Eagle.


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 8:13 AM
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18

8: I think I'm more worried about the giant eagles in that headline than the alligator.


Posted by: politicalfootball | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 8:13 AM
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19

I mean, what vehicles do they drive that they need a parking lot?


Posted by: politicalfootball | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 8:14 AM
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20

Oh, man, that's some serious pwnage in 12.


Posted by: politicalfootball | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 8:16 AM
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21

||
IDK how accurate it is, but The Loudest Voice is good TV. (Which, ironic.) Also, I look forward to a long villain phase in Russell Crowe's career.
|>


Posted by: Mossy Character | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 8:28 AM
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22

15: That's a pornographic comic.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 8:28 AM
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23

15: The site is; the page linked within it is not.


Posted by: Minivet | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 8:28 AM
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24

I KNOW IT WHEN I SEE IT


Posted by: OPINIONATED NET NANNY | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 8:32 AM
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25

||
And topically: The Heavens and the Earth: read/no-read?
|>


Posted by: Mossy Character | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 8:50 AM
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26

The blocking of Oglaf in Arrakis was a major impetus to my finally getting a VPN


Posted by: Barry Freed | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 9:40 AM
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27

Never a single drop of cum sprite on Arrakis.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 9:53 AM
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28

Friday WTF: I somehow didn't hear about the Dow-Dupont merger, but none of this is surprising: chlorpyrifos is A-OK with the EPA. Not sure the cruelty of that is the (only) point, but it's just textbook ghoulishness.

Minnesotans, looking at that map: any hope of a statewide ban? California obviously didn't give a shit about poisoning agrarian communities for decades, but are heading in the right direction now.


Posted by: lurid keyaki | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 10:20 AM
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29

28. Apparently not good for bees either, according to Wikipedia.


Posted by: DaveLMA | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 11:45 AM
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30

I rely on you people to tell me stuff like this. I feel let down.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 3:33 PM
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31

Why does Alan Dershowitz want me to wonder how many women David Boies has had sex with?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 4:25 PM
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32

" my perfect, perfect sex life" is the most Trumpian quote that wasn't actually said by Trump.


Posted by: peep | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 5:30 PM
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33

I think I need to wash out my brain with carbolic acid or something, after reading this thread. Jaysus!


Posted by: Just Plain Jane | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 6:21 PM
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34

Luzerne County, Pennsylvania really hates kids. But, I guess they had nowhere to go but up.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 6:26 PM
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35

34: really hates poor and black kids, specifically.


Posted by: dalriata | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 6:30 PM
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36

I know nothing else about the place. I've never been anywhere in the state east of Altoona except Philadelphia.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 6:53 PM
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37

I guess I went to Gettysburg when I was a child.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 6:55 PM
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38

|| I forget whether there's other exvangelicals here, but NMM to Joshua Harris's marriage. |>


Posted by: Unfoggetarian, "pause endlessly, then go in" (9) | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 7:01 PM
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39

Luzerne County, Pennsylvania really hates kids.

I guess I just don't even get this. Who the hell even cares if a kid cannot afford to pay the lunch bill, you're just supposed to feed the children. Indeed, if you call yourself a Christian, your willingness to feed the children is positively demanded of you. 'But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for such is the kingdom of heaven' (Matthew 19:14). And to put a child into foster care because his/her parent cannot afford to pay the lunch bill?! What a horrible combination of bat-shit craziness and sheer, unadulterated cruelty.


Posted by: Just Plain Jane | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 7:03 PM
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40

31: It vaguely reminds me of the Murphy Brown episode where the long-time anchor guy goes on camera to declare that he's only had sex with his wife, except I don't think he had been accused of anything related to sex with children, rape, or human trafficking, and the character was always portrayed as a decent guy.


Posted by: fake accent | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 7:07 PM
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41

38: Wait at least a week before texting his ex.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 7:20 PM
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42

I keep reading this post title to rhyme with "purgatory." Maybe it is all somehow a purifying scourge, JPJ?


Posted by: lurid keyaki | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 7:27 PM
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43

Suffer little children

Maybe it was "Suffer, little children."


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 7:40 PM
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44

42: My mother used to say to me, "Offer it up to the souls in Purgatory," whenever I had a complaint. But she meant to teach me discipline and self-sacrifice; she never meant to suggest I should deprive small children of access to food and water and parental affection!


Posted by: Just Plain Jane | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 7:58 PM
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45

My cousin, who doesn't even live in Iowa now, was passing through and got a picture with Sanders. And a women from my high school who moved to Iowa got a picture with Warren. It must be really weird to have that kind of exposure to a primary.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 8:00 PM
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46

But, yes. You aren't allowed to offer up other people's suffering, especially if you inflict it. I asked two separate nuns plus one priest and got the same answer.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 8:09 PM
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47

28.2: I'm very dubious about the current DFL's commitment to any environmental activism more strenuous than creating Very Stern Position Papers about global warming and shit. (Also, we don't have the state senate, so probably no dice.) It's nice to see that, while there isn't much chloripyrofus use in Hennepin County, it appears that there's quite a lot in the part of Wisconsin I visit frequently.


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 8:32 PM
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48

I asked two separate nuns plus one priest and got the same answer.

Twenty bucks, same as in town?


Posted by: Natilo Paennim | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 8:33 PM
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49

Neither Lucerne nor Luzern, but Luzerne. No wonder they're troubled.


Posted by: Mossy Character | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 8:36 PM
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50

My high school principal was a monsignor who was my own damn cousin. The Rev. Father Leonard L*nney. He collected antique cars as a hobby (which, probably, yeah, didn't exactly mesh with a vow of poverty: those vintage autos are expensive!), but he was way liberal by American standards: he thought workers should be paid a living wage for their efforts. He used to sing "Danny Boy" at school fundraisers, he had that Irish tenor thing going on, lovely voice, would bring a tear to your eye.


Posted by: Just Plain Jane | Link to this comment | 07-19-19 8:41 PM
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51

||

the level of the Mekong this week was lower than the lowest during the dry season, even though mid-July is normally the rainy season and the river should be full and even overflowing."We are facing an extraordinary situation, because instead of the seasonal floods that we usually face this time of year, we are now encountering a severe drought, which is bad for both the people and the ecosystem," Narit said.
[...]
"The extremely low level of water is killing these fish, because it is preventing them from entering tributaries to lay eggs in flooded forests and swamps, which means an entire generation of fish will vanish,"
[...]
many fish were found "cooked" in the hot water of ponds in the Mekong riverbed in Nong Khai's Sangkhom district after the water level receded due to a recent reduction in water discharged from China's Jinghong Dam and a test-run operation at Laos' Xayaburi Dam.
|>


Posted by: Mossy Character | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 9:50 AM
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52

Do they want my basement water? It's really high in minerals. When I was running it out over the driveway, it made a white streak that didn't fade for like three years.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 11:05 AM
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53

Just make sure it doesn't have any alligators in it.


Posted by: Mossy Character | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 11:13 AM
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54

||
And seriously, no Apollo post? Rootless cosmopolitans indeed.
|>


Posted by: Mossy Character | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 11:17 AM
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55

Don't they have crocodiles there anyway?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 11:17 AM
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56

"A gift of spring water, from the American people! (You might have to kill an alligator when you open it, but you third world folks are super hardcore, I'm sure you'll be fine!)"


Posted by: Mossy Character | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 11:20 AM
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57

Technically, it might be more of a run-off from an abandoned mine situation than a spring. I have no idea how to tell the difference.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 11:27 AM
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58

I think the irremovable stain on your driveway offers a hint.


Posted by: Mossy Character | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 11:29 AM
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59

Where I come from, mine drainage is hypersaline, enough enough to kill biomes. PA is but a wannabe.


Posted by: Mossy Character | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 12:00 PM
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60

We just finished book 6 of Harry Potter. Now I know what Moby meant when he said "Snape kills Dumbledore." And yet I did not see it coming.


Posted by: heebie | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 1:07 PM
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https://www.google.com/amp/s/ottawacitizen.com/news/local-news/underwear-clad-woman-wielding-pitchfork-arrested-after-kingston-rampage/amp

Sorry for the messy link. I'm on my iPhone. I think the title is even better than a story about a methgator.


Posted by: Bostoniangirl | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 1:22 PM
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62

62: It was of course a younger sister.


Posted by: NW | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 1:41 PM
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63

For older daughters, advantageous marriages; for younger, the church or the Time Corps.


Posted by: Mossy Character | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 1:46 PM
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64

If everybody in Kingston was on masses of meth, it would explain the huge wrecks I saw on what looked like open, obstruction-free freeway.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 2:37 PM
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65

There are so many Kingstons.


Posted by: Mossy Character | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 2:38 PM
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66

If the alligators become a problem, we can have the Himalayan bear eat them.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 5:32 PM
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60: That was the best book, but you still have to read book 7 or you'll miss when Harry and Hermione have sex with each other.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 6:51 PM
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68

And Ron gets eaten by a Himalayan bear.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 7:32 PM
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69

You've never steered me wrong yet! I can't wait to listen to it next year, when we drive back and forth to Montana all over again. God-fucking-damn it's good to be home.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 8:18 PM
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I should take the family to Montana next summer. My son has never been west of Denver and if you don't count airports, never west of Grand Island.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 8:25 PM
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I've been trying to find out the percentage of bear attacks in Pennsylvania that were Himalayan bears. I think it's 100% in 2019, but I can't find anything for certain.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 8:30 PM
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72

You could go to Montana without going west of Denver.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 8:33 PM
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73

Why would I go to the shitty part of Montana?


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 8:38 PM
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74

I thought you'd want to exhaust East of Denver before venturing westward. Have you even been everywhere?


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 8:40 PM
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75

I've been to every state in the union except Alaska, Hawaii, Maine, Vermont, New Hampshire, Rhode Island, and Massachusetts.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 8:42 PM
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76

Earlier this summer, I was within ten miles of Vermont, but it seemed like too much effort.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 8:45 PM
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77

But have you ever been to YOU?


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 8:52 PM
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78

I've been to me, except not Vermont-Me.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 9:07 PM
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79

Now that heebie is safely home, I guess I can return to Montana. Oregon isn't that bad, except for the people supporting their meth habits by stealing mountain bikes.


Posted by: CharleyCarp | Link to this comment | 07-20-19 9:27 PM
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80

They lack the human touch of those stealing bikes to support a heroin addiction.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-21-19 7:52 AM
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81

||

NMM to Merry Prankster, Yippie, and very funny guy, Paul Krassner. Damn.


|>


Posted by: Barry Freed | Link to this comment | 07-21-19 2:16 PM
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82

80: I've heard there's an increasing trend of people who are addicted to heroin picking up a meth habit to bring them back up from the opioid down times.


Posted by: Stanley | Link to this comment | 07-21-19 2:27 PM
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83

It probably makes it easier to steal a bike.


Posted by: Moby Hick | Link to this comment | 07-21-19 3:52 PM
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84

What I heard was meth while you're working, then opioids and chill.


Posted by: Mossy Character | Link to this comment | 07-21-19 4:21 PM
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85

34 et al. I have been to Luzerne County, PA. Multiple times, actually; there is a lovely state park there called Ricketts Glen.

35. The county itself is very poor (all the coal mines and factories closed and nothing ever replaced them) and the most typical thing you see on the roads are billboards for lawyers who will fix whatever trouble you are currently in. The county is also very, very white: nearly 97% white. I think if they are targeting black kids they have to work pretty hard to find them. Poor kids, yeah, I can believe that.


Posted by: DaveLMA | Link to this comment | 07-21-19 4:32 PM
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there is a lovely state park there called Ricketts Glen.

That seems a little too on-the-nose. Twinned with Pellagra Bayou, LA, and Hookworm County, MS?


Posted by: | Link to this comment | 07-22-19 6:02 AM
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