I am an American currently living in a Middle Eastern country with a very strict lockdown but very few cases of coronavirus. So I boned. A lot. This country has a curfew from 6 pm every night to 8 am in the morning during which you can't leave your home, taxis don't run, etc. A man came over to my apartment to "chill" which eventually turned into sex.
Congrats, Barry!
So it sounds like these people are not practicing safe social distancing?
This is an extremely irritating time to be in an LDR that normally involves frequent visits. It's been since early March and I'm not happy.
If you would have phrased that as "and I'm not feeling happy," I could have made a Seven Dwarves joke that would have cheered me up.
Would it help if I said I was feeling grumpy?
Sounds as if we're both feeling grumpy. Damn dwarf is getting way more action than I am.
1 lol, that's not me but I'm working on it.
1 Lockdown isn't that strict here, that might be Kuwait.
Does seven 1" dwarf dicks equal one 7" shlong?
In Disney, dwarves had smaller dicks, but Tolkien followed the Finnish legends which told of their massive endowment.
12: If you were being simultaneously penetrated by all of them it would be an interesting experience in one to two different dimensions than the interesting experience provided when all seven inches are concatenated end-to-end.
I'm picturing those pin tables where you press your hand, and you see the pin-image of your hand raising up on the other side. Tiny dwarf dong table of penetration.
At the Lawrence Hall of Science in Berkeley they had a vertical version of one of those pin tables, and next to it was a sign depicting one person sticking their face in the pin wall, while another, shorter person on the other side was raising up a hand to smack the extruded pinface, all in a red circle with a slash through it. COME ON.
I bet that in the future, "Spring 2020" is common setting for incest-themed porn.
What'd be really hot are a few "I had sex with my spouse for the first time in x years" Though I gather stories in the link in the OP are supposed to be at least somewhat believable.
The person who got together with their ex who is an essential worker and can't socially distance then gets COVID and is mad at him is fucked up.
My SIL is going through a divorce. Her soon-to-be-ex moved in with his retired parents, one of whom is in poor health. The kids stay Friday night with their dad and the rest of the time with her. She started dating and found a man she'd been "spending time with" pre-quarantine. So, the kids leave on Friday night, she rushes to lover's house, spends the night, and returns the next morning with no one the wiser.
They could read some philosophy books that night
15. I don't think even the Empress Theodora ever imagined seven.
Not /quite/ 19 territory, but not as far away from that as I'd like.
Spouse and I were actually just about to start some couples counseling about our total lack of intimacy of late when everything shut down, and it seemed (and still seems) super-awkward to start that up as a video chat thing.
I'm just glad the article didn't use an "in the time of" phrasing in the headline or anywhere else.
I'm going medieval for this; just put myself on the waitlist at my public library for an ebook copy of The Decameron. (Was surprised there was even a waitlist; I guess many others had the same idea.)
24 sounds rough. Have you considered asking the mineshaft in very general terms? There are a few here who have been through recent divorces, others who seem happily coupled, so maybe there's some perspective here about what's salvageable and which behaviors are really bad signs.
28. Maybe ther erecent translation is worth the extra steps, but John Payne's here: http://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/23700
Something about Rule 34 of the internet: there will be porn. Try: Coronavirus Porn Is Going Viral on Pornhub. I won't quote some of the titles, though the titles are often the best thing about pornography. Read and weep, or get it on, if that's your thing: https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/xgq5ew/coronavirus-porn-going-viral-pornhub-xhamster
I don't think even the Empress Theodora ever imagined seven.
Friends, Romans, countrymen, let me lend you my ears.
I've been greatly enjoying all the texting with people I used to date that have started contacting me again. I was a little hurt that my favorite one stayed silent for so long, but then he capitulated last Thursday!
Also having longer custody stints has resulted in long periods of no sex and then a lot of time making up for it, which is delightful.
24 does sound rough. I wonder if it would be easier if your spouse and you were on separate devices in separate rooms, instead of sitting side by side talking to a therapist on a screen. I'm just thinking that it sounds emotionally intense, and maybe that would help keep it from being too intense.
I do not think it means what you think it means.
heebie: Doing chats from separate places is an interesting idea. I would hope the therapist had an opinion on that, though maybe this is all too weird and new to know. There's been enough anxiety from the pandemic/lockdown that it feels like rocking the boat in a bad way to even bring up the intimacy or any therapy about it.
Not sure what I can really share without being too identifying. Their libido is just gone - they know, they aren't happy about it either, but it's not there. Some leading suspects are depression (being treated, has been present longer than we've been together, but IMO not very successfully of late), side effects of antidepressants, and body image issues exacerbated by medication-induced weight gain. A lot of medication juggling has happened, and every time I would wonder if this was the time that something would change for the better, and it hasn't. None of these issues are things I can really do anything about, so I feel kind of stuck, like my only option is to wait forever and hope something magically changes on one of those fronts. I have contemplated getting myself set up with some antidepressants - perhaps zapping my own libido would be an improvement, and it's something I could take control of.
One couples therapist told me that she doesn't like doing video therapy with couples, because it's hard to see both couples reactions through the video.
I've heard that bicycling with a bad seat can work wonders for ending male libido.
38. Depression is so difficult-- wish I had more to offer than sympathies on a tough situation.
I tried taking antidepressants solely for libido suppression in the earlyish years with Lee, but it didn't help, for whatever it's worth. I think I'm supposed to be fairly circumspect about discussing the current relationship, but cohabitation is lovely in so many respects and some of those are pertinent to this thread. But also there are times like now where there are five people and a dog on my bed as Odile watches Supergirl and the regular-girls chat and/or fiddle on personal electronics like I'm doing that are plenty pleasant in other ways.
Sympathies, GW. This is one of those "ecological" problems: complex, lots of inputs, requires a lot of conscious effort to get a result that's supposed to be spontaneous and unstoppable.
On the pharm side, why are there so many more antidepressants than safe, effective aphrodisiacs?
Ooh, that never occurs to people. Say, GW, have you tried getting your partner drunk? It didn't?
The whole process is objectively ridiculous. You need to kill your own sense of self-consciousness.
So, suppose you were seeing, non-exclusively, someone who was exclusively seeing you (and this much, at least, was known to both parties!) before everything went haywire, and were actually thinking of ending things with this person but didn't have the stones to go through with it, and this person went to a nearby state for what was going to be the weekend but which turned into, like, five or six weeks, until finally returning to your city, citing as part of their reason for doing so the fact of missing and desiring to see you, and on their return you resume seeing each other, now de facto exclusively, but you resume thinking you ought to end the liaison, but--while it's true that there's never a great time to do that, this seems like a particularly bad time, especially since their birthday is coming up--but now their birthday is past, in fact was a week ago, and you haven't seen each other since then (having turned down an invitation over the weekend)--suppose all that: what then, huh?
You should just break up with them. There's never a good time to break someone's heart.
Alcohol is an interesting confounder. We're both fans, generally. In the past there was an interestingly fine line for her between boozed up enough to be relaxed and interested and enough to fall asleep.
But lately it hasn't seemed to have that effect - the transition between sober and uninterested and drunk and uninterested is seamless.
48: break it off ASAP, clearly. Sorry it's ending on a low note, though, what a bummer.
48 is one of those requests for advice that's absurd because there's such an obvious right answer. I guess sometimes you just need to write it out to get the stones to do it.
I guess sometimes you just need to write it out to get the stones to do it.
Yes, it's not as if I need someone to tell me what the right thing to do is, but stating it baldly is itself helpful, both as a way of making the actual state of affairs plainer and as a sort of precommitment device.
Up at 3:30 am for a walk with my hot Polish friend.
Oops, meant to post this in the semi-weekly check in thread. But I suppose it's appropriate since I'm hoping this eventually becomes a quarantine sex story.
53 is reassuring. I was worried the real sub-question was "can I boink her one more time, before I go, because this quarantine is tough?"
And I'm back, that was shorter, about an hour and a half. And around her neighborhood more or less. Maybe tomorrow morning again. But Friday we're going back to that marina with the long boardwalk where you can see the fishes swim in the Gulf waters.
48: I think you need to just break it off. If you already realize that you're not in it for that kind of exclusive, long-term relationship, it's not fair to her to not let her know.
Seconding 61; and, Barry, have you not considered that watching fish swim in clear water together is one day going to seem better than sex? You may have to wait thirty or forty years, but hang in there.
As if there'll be any fish in thirty years.
Exactly. Not one sorry soul to remember how to spell coelacanth.
62: according to revealed preference, it already does seem better, because if you're a scuba diver you'll be happy to travel several thousands of miles in order to watch fish swim in clear water.
63 If this coronavirus keeps up they may recover.
66 What, and risk my paramour being sexually assaulted by a dolphin!
67: or indeed by a ceoloca coeloca coealaca pure mad dead old fish.
Those guys like to stay deep.
57: Outstanding! I laugh so much whenever I read Moby's comments.