I suppose that would have been a more apt post title.
I've never made pea soup but I have replaced a toilet. The hard part is carrying the old toilet out without spilling the water from the trap.
There are a lot of options for toilets but they don't exist in all combinations, so figuring out any hard constraints and learning what matches those first can narrow down the range a lot. If you're working with a plumber, ask them what they can get and when - a model that seems appealing but is six months away because of supply chain issues won't help you much.
We replaced a toilet last year (it had a slight tank leak, and then I cracked the tank trying to tighten it a bit), and knowing that we needed a flush lever on the right side (facing it) restricted things a lot.
The plumbing will almost certainly be compatible, though; there's not a lot of variation there.
I had assumed that you first bought a toilet from Lowe's and then found a plumber to install it? It's not part of a major renovation where we'd already have someone on hand.
One hose, one connector, two screws, and a wax ring. Only need an hour, two if you have dinner first.
Plumbers will have their own supply sources, so if you're going to call one anyway to install it it's worth getting in touch with them up front and finding out what they can get for you, which will be different from what you can track down yourself at Lowes.
(But if you just want a recommendation: Toto Drake dual-flush)
God's plan is that I bless the rain down in Africa.
I was just reading people raving about Toto toilets on the Buy It For Life reddit page! I'm convinced.
Still confused about the plumber, though. So I should find a plumber and tell them which toilet I want, and let them do the ordering?
Flushmate pressure assist toilet. The normal water pressure from your pipes fills and pressurizes a tank which blasts away all your your processed split peas. Compatible with normal input and output, no electrical connection.
You can get the same effect by putting the toilet tank on the roof.
Add another vote for the Toto. We got two when we remodeled, and they have great flushing power and water economy.
You should be able to just order the toilet itself from your favorite hardware or plumbing supply store; if you're not up for installing it yourself, your contractor will get the remaining parts (wax ring, any necessary wall-to-tank hoses, etc) and add them to your invoice.
Interesting Amazon review of the Toto, does this match people's experience?
researched toilets for weeks before ultimately choosing this Toto Drake dual flush (.8 and 1.6g)
I was very concerned about the reviews, which seemed like people were reviewing two entirely different toilets. There were tons of people (and plumbers!) online that said this toilet was the best toilet in its class, bar none, with excellent flushing capability for no clogging and no remains in the bowl.
Then there were equally as many reviews from users saying this was the worst toilet ever and every single visit to the bathroom resulted in monstrous skidmarks that flushing wouldn't resolve and which required brushing/cleaning after every turn.
How could people have such opposing experiences on the same toilet? Well, I bought 3 of these toilets and have been using them for about a month. To be explicit, IBS runs in the family, with some family members have large, hard movements and others having frequent sticky or soft movements. This family can put a toilet through it's paces.
Conclusions: The toilet has an extremely efficient flush with no remains left in the bowl. Caveat: As part of its engineering design for efficiency and low water consumption, this toto Drake toilet is designed to only hold a small amount of water in the toilet "hole" part. There is NO WATER JUST SITTING IN THE BOWL. The bowl is basically there solely to provide a swirling path for the flush water to force the waste in the "hole" through the plumbing. Therefore, in order to be happy with this toilet, you have to sit ALL THE WAY BACK when you do your duty. This should properly aim/align what you're dropping off with the water reservoir designed to receive it.
If, however, you choose to "perch" on the front of the toilet and use the dry toilet bowl itself as your landing zone, the flush (no matter how powerful) will be hard pressed to remove all remnants of your visit. If you're leaving deliveries on the dry porcelain, you will have to either take a wad of toilet paper to wipe off remains before it dries, or use a brush to clean. If you leave the remains above the water line to dry without cleaning, good luck in your cleaning efforts--because you'll need it.
So there. We've been very happy with the performance of these toilets over the last couple of months--but for our teenager there was a learning curve in the "aiming" department, and also a lesson on "if you leave a mark, clean it up before you leave the bathroom". If your personal preference or body mechanics do not allow for a proper aiming into the water filled hole of this toilet, you're not going to like it and should look for a toilet with larger water consumption and a water-filled toilet bowl. This is not that toilet. If, however, you can manage to get your deliveries on the designed target, it's a great toilet which flushes quickly, powerfully, and quietly.
So you're saying that Trump was right about toilets?
Get a shatafa installed. You'll have a cleaner butt and save on TP.
13 is a great piece of writing. If that person doesn't have technical documentation as part of their professional profile, that's talent down the tubes.
The toilet has an extremely efficient flush with no remains left in the bowl
I understand the need for a euphemism here but can we not use "remains"?
we've been plunging it daily for a decade
This is the craziest goddamn thing I've ever read.
Also, it's easy to replace a toilet yourself.
Also, we have Toto toilets, but not dual-flush, because keep it simple.
Or round the S bend in this context.
Before Ogged can get here, you need a washlet.
So I should find a plumber and tell them which toilet I want, and let them do the ordering?
Yes, to the first part, then ask them on the second part. Sometimes they'll put a markup on an item you can just as easily purchase for yourself. Sometimes they get it at a discount, then mark it back up to your price, and sometimes they pass the savings on to you. They'll also know more about availability--Store X is backordered, but Store Y has them in stock.
As long as you're getting them involved for installation, you may as well get them involved at the start.
Also, there's very little chance that the Toto will fit in your existing tile cutout, I'm sorry to say.
On a related note, are you happy with the Duravit?
13 is a great piece of writing. If that person doesn't have technical documentation as part of their professional profile, that's talent down the tubes.
I had the same response.
I recommend the Poopmaster 5000, which comes with an ample splash zone and genuine Saskatchewan seal skin bindings.
15: Probably just a gifted amateur pooper.
If you make your hobby a profession, you might lose your enjoyment of it.
On a related note, are you happy with the Duravit?
No complaints! Hawaii has taken over that bathroom and scared the kids out of using it, though, so it's our least used toilet.
Also, there's very little chance that the Toto will fit in your existing tile cutout, I'm sorry to say.
Oh, hm. Is this true of any other brand besides whatever builder's grade 90's thing we have now?
20.last. Our toilets sit on top of the tile.
This is the craziest goddamn thing I've ever read.
Maybe it got worse over time. It's a terrible toilet either way.
Just went and checked, and it looks like ours also sits on top of the tile. I don't know if that makes it better or not.
It means you just need to buy a wax ring with depth enough.
29: That's the norm, but not universal. The only downside is that, if you have a bad tile installation, your toilet can get a bit wobbly, but it's worth it not to have the issue you thought you might have.
Maybe someday I will change the tile. I don't actually like it very much.
31: I think our bathroom when I was a kid had a wood floor.
High-end reviewer of high-end toilets.
32: It's simple enough to uninstall the toilet, lay new tile, and reinstall.
33: Our 1st & 3rd floor toilets are on wood. Our 2nd floor is on concrete because we had to cut out the tile (and the slab it sat on) to redo the original plumbing that had failed.
One-piece toilets are nice to have if some people in your house pee standing up.
Wait. Where are you standing that it matters?
Sometimes there's splashing, and once in a while one's aim is off in a dark bathroom in the middle of the night. It's hard to get a cleaning rag in between the tank and base.
All toilets should be prominently rated on how hard they are to clean, IME. I have a lifetime's grudge against the bolt covers at the base.
Are you going to get one of those Japanese toilets with the buttons and the spa treatment for your ass?
I'm with Spike: If you can, get a toilet with the bidet features. Google had these, and boy howdy it was nice.
Google had these
I mean, you can Google just about everything.
Damn, I should do a Josh Barro style twitter thread about how Americans think they're rich but don't have to plunge the toilet daily
It's because our food is the kind that turns into poop after you eat it.
I have had to plunge a toilet about once in my life. Daily? Something is very wrong with your plumbing. In one sense or another.
Texas has poops, but not in a way you can understand.
I take it a high end reviewer is one with unusually long legs.
We own a Toto and the phenomenon noted by the reviewer in 13 is real--our family calls it "the elf on the shelf"
We have had two Kohler 1.6 L toilets for at least 10 years and they've been fine. (ms bill's sister used to be a designer at Kohler which was some reassurance) We've had to plunge a couple times in that interval but those were directly attributable to having heavy, err, contributions from multiple guests at a time.
The trick is to compare which side of the family can clog the toilet.
Simultaneous contributions is probably something even the Kohler designers did not consider.
Somewhere deep in the archives, I explained about my game "Three Sounds".
The gist of it is that if three parts of your body are making sounds at the same time, you win. The genesis of this game was an old boyfriend who was peeing while talking to me from the bathroom, when he tooted unexpectedly. He was the first winner.
There's a woman who sells her farts to enthusiastic practitioners of non-standard heterosexuality. Supposedly she farted to much she caused herself intestinal trouble, which suggests she's either really honest or really dishonest.
Is this the same person who just transitioned to selling the farts as NFTs instead of in jars?
Since I'm John Stamos, I'll just note that he was great to work with and will be missed by all.
I'm probably in Fuller House more recently. Maybe that's not a horror.