Re: I demand that you remove me from your rooster!

1

What, no joke about "hobosexuals?"

Apostropher: Objectively Pro-Hobosexual.


Posted by: arthegall | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 9:24 AM
horizontal rule
2

I am the Genises!


Posted by: Becks | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 9:27 AM
horizontal rule
3

My cheekbones are large, but no, I wouldn't say erroneously so. . . .


Posted by: Armsmasher | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 9:29 AM
horizontal rule
4

"erroneously" s/b "erroniously"


Posted by: Armsmasher | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 9:30 AM
horizontal rule
5

I am a hobophobe.


Posted by: The Modesto Kid | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 9:41 AM
horizontal rule
6

I have never misused the bibel to justify my bigtry, I misused the bible to justify my opinion, as I do in my everyday life.

I too misuse the bible, mostly to try to convince girls that a penis was not meant to go into a man's butt, but rather a womens.


Posted by: Jon McGee | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 9:43 AM
horizontal rule
7

Hey, I sent that e-mail privately, or so I thought.


Posted by: Joe Drymala | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 9:49 AM
horizontal rule
8

Okay, I just got 2.


Posted by: Joe Drymala | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 9:53 AM
horizontal rule
9

Item #1 on the hobosexual agenda: fortified wine subsidies.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 10:15 AM
horizontal rule
10

item the second: higher tariffs on foreign box-car manufacturers! let's keep those jobs here at home.


Posted by: arthegall | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 10:26 AM
horizontal rule
11

Exploration budget for locating Rock Candy Mountain, cigarette bushes, etc., to be doubled.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 10:45 AM
horizontal rule
12

Budget for train conductors to be slashed.


Posted by: Matt Weiner | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 10:48 AM
horizontal rule
13

A ten foot perimeter to be established around all train tracks mandated to be cleared of rocks and thorny bushes.


Posted by: Tia | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 10:51 AM
horizontal rule
14

Strict laws to be enforced against vicious dogs.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 10:52 AM
horizontal rule
15

Turk that invented work to be hung.


Posted by: Matt Weiner | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 10:56 AM
horizontal rule
16

Roger Miller canonized.


Posted by: FL | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 10:59 AM
horizontal rule
17

Turk that invented work to be hung.

A true hobosexual would insist that he be well hung.


Posted by: My Alter Ego | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 11:00 AM
horizontal rule
18

Railroad bulls to be eliminated.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 11:02 AM
horizontal rule
19

Fish, Wildlife, and Marine Resources to investigate plausibility of alcohol-replenishment program in nation's waterways.


Posted by: Matt Weiner | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 11:05 AM
horizontal rule
20

Government-supplied harmonicas and condoms in one care package.


Posted by: Tia | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 11:06 AM
horizontal rule
21

Dick Cheney's daughter is a hobo.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 11:07 AM
horizontal rule
22

The right of hobos to be secure in their persons, boxcars, loosely-fashioned stick-borne blanket-bags, and effects, against unreasonable rummaging and rousting by dudes with dogs, or other hobos, shall not be violated.


Posted by: arthegall | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 11:08 AM
horizontal rule
23

Increased funding for the arts (e.g., harmonica, whittling).


Posted by: Armsmasher | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 11:09 AM
horizontal rule
24

"My wife is not a lesbian and neither is my son."


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 11:09 AM
horizontal rule
25

Increased funding for the arts.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 11:11 AM
horizontal rule
26

I am a little skeved out by hobosexuality

Before recording the song, McClintock cleaned it up considerably from the version he sang as a street busker in 1897. Originally the song described a child being recruited into hobo life by tales of the "big rock candy mountain". Such recruitment actually occurred, with hobos enchanting children with tales of adventure called ghost stories by other hobos. In proof of his authorship of the song, McClintock published the original words, the last verse of which was:

The punk rolled up his big blue eyes
And said to the jocker, "Sandy,
I've hiked and hiked and wandered too,
But I ain't seen any candy.
I've hiked and hiked till my feet are sore
And I'll be damned if I hike any more
To be buggered sore like a hobo's whore
In the Big Rock Candy Mountains.


Posted by: Joe O | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 11:17 AM
horizontal rule
27

He's dead, Jim.


Posted by: arthegall | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 11:27 AM
horizontal rule
28

There is a site out there (which I am *not* going to try to find from my work computer) dedicated to hobosexuality. The very frightening front page has pictures of apparantly homeless men being ejaculated on. It was really disturbing. What I couldn't figure out, though, was whether this was someone's actual fetish, or whether they had created the elaborate website simply in pursuit of a bad pun.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 11:34 AM
horizontal rule
29

There is a site out there (which I am *not* going to try to find from my work computer) dedicated to hobosexuality. The very frightening front page has pictures of apparantly homeless men being ejaculated on. It was really disturbing. What I couldn't figure out, though, was whether this was someone's actual fetish, or whether they had created the elaborate website simply in pursuit of a bad pun.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 11:35 AM
horizontal rule
30

There is a site out there (which I am *not* going to try to find from my work computer) dedicated to hobosexuality. The very frightening front page has pictures of apparantly homeless men being ejaculated on. It was really disturbing. What I couldn't figure out, though, was whether this was someone's actual fetish, or whether they had created the elaborate website simply in pursuit of a bad pun.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 11:36 AM
horizontal rule
31

Sorry for the triple post.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 11:38 AM
horizontal rule
32

Yeah, there's a whole subgenre of porn dedicated to pretty, young women servicing grizzled old homeless guys as well.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 11:39 AM
horizontal rule
33

Thanks SO much for that, Apo.

Lesbianism, huh? Might have to give that another thought. Or perhaps, a convent.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 11:41 AM
horizontal rule
34

Thanks SO much for that, Apo.

You know me and the dark underbelly of the internet. It's a river of depravity, and around every corner is a newer and stranger fish to examine.

Or perhaps, a convent.

Time for confession, Sister Bitch.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 11:46 AM
horizontal rule
35

BUMS OF STEEL!


Posted by: FL | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 11:56 AM
horizontal rule
36

After your confession, I shall return to beating my students with rulers.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 12:05 PM
horizontal rule
37

Just because I had a ruler, this bitch nun professor started wailing on me...


Posted by: Chopper | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 1:05 PM
horizontal rule
38

The real deal with the hobos is that, despite what the right would have you believe, they have no pay agenda.


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 3:14 PM
horizontal rule
39

Also, from further down that page, my favorite is easily "orbisexual."

Oh, Roy, I really am walking down the street! Oh yes! Yes!


Posted by: Robust McManlyPants | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 3:20 PM
horizontal rule
40

Funny you should mention Roy Orbison.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 3:23 PM
horizontal rule
41

orbisexual

I like 'em round.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 3:24 PM
horizontal rule
42

If you're trying to say "homosexuals" with a head cold, then it comes out (heh) as "hobosexuals."


Posted by: Ellen | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 5:09 PM
horizontal rule
43

Awesome:
It always starts the same way. I am in the garden airing my terrapin Jetta when he walks past my gate, that mysterious man in black.

'Hello Roy,' I say. 'What are you doing in Dusseldorf?'

'Attending to certain matters,' he replies.


Posted by: The Modesto Kid | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 6:23 PM
horizontal rule
44

This is moderately off-"topic" but -- reading this thread reminded me of a marvelous book I read in my first year of college, which was a memoir and photo essay about a year of riding the rails. Could not remember the title or author but: I looked at the English department's web page from the college I went to that year, scanned the professors' names, recognized the name of the teacher who had assigned me that book, sent him an enquiring email, and heard back this very evening -- the book was "Good Company" by Douglas Harper -- the professor had not assigned it but had invited Dr. Harper into class to talk, I guess I bough the book and read it on my own -- and the professor remembers me and wishes me well, which I find kind of gratifying.

Anyway, if your interested in hobos you ought to take a look at "Good Company". A lovely book. It is not in print but there are a couple of used copies on Amazon for under $5.


Posted by: The Big Rock Candy Modesto Kid | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 7:41 PM
horizontal rule
45

Also excellent is Jack London's The Road (a memoir of his hobo days. Which would be after his oyster pirate days, contemporaneous with his sailor days, and I believe before his Yukon days. Which are all before his alcoholic writer days. If it weren't for the drinking problem and the dying young thing, I would totally want to be Jack London. (well, and the hideously racist thing. I'd skip that bit too.)) But it's a fun, fun book.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 8:09 PM
horizontal rule
46

I thought this documentary was pretty well done.


Posted by: eb | Link to this comment | 04-14-06 8:40 PM
horizontal rule
47

If anyone is orbisexual, it is this man. (Warning: Link is extremely not safe for work.)


Posted by: My Alter Ego | Link to this comment | 04-15-06 5:43 PM
horizontal rule
48

Hey a comment Tia left on the books-for-Becks thread reminds me I wanted to crow about this: I got a copy of Harper's Good Company on Amazon for $4! Hard cover, very good condition! I am reading it now and digging it greatly -- I am definitely meaning to try and locate a copy of his Working Knowledge: Skill and Community in a Small Shop next.


Posted by: The Modesto Kid | Link to this comment | 04-24-06 8:41 AM
horizontal rule