From here "malkin" is said to be the origin of "merkin"
And "merkin" is also undeniably hilarious. It's a two-fer.
I manage to avoid MM completely, except in her presence in blogs reacting to her. Where do people keep encountering her and her opinions? If weren't for blogs, I wouldn't know she existed.
If you watch FoxNews for any length of time, you'll see her.
Unrelated, but who the hell falls for this scam?
Wait, that guy wasn't a real doctor?!?
On the advice of my lawyers, I decline to answer that question.
But you're about due for a follow-up check, you know. Wouldn't want to miss any of your lumps, your lumps, your lumps*.
*This part included especially for Matt Weiner.
Actually, I'm due for a pap smear.
Is there any less sexy phrase than "pap smear"? I ask you.
I haven't looked it up, but wouldn't it mean 'cat' as in 'Greymalkin'? Or as a cat name, is the cat being called a slattern?
Well, "cat" means "bitchy woman." So maybe malkin / graymalkin have the "woman" thing as background.
No, "trans-urethral resectioning" just sounds clinical. Whereas "pap smear" has the flat a, the double p, and the lovely sound of "smear" in it. Yukko.
A graymalkin is a merkin sold at the retirement home.
Do they have cornrow merkins yet?
"trans-urethral resectioning" just sounds clinical
Scat queen?
Delurking here, the OED says Malkin as a name came first, then to evolve into "slattern" etc. It was originally a diminuitive of "Maud," or maybe "Mary," and came to be used for "a lower-class, untidy, or sluttish woman."
"Graymalkin" or "grimalkin" probably derived from giving some cats that name.
It also lists the phrase "malkin-mad" meaning mad as a hare (because Scots used the word to mean hare). Perhaps this could be converted into a new synonym for "Malkinesque"?
Not sure. I think the sibilant s, the hard t, and the long e sound make "scat queen" kind of fun and playful, no? Like one of my favorite onomatopoeic phrases, "rat's ass."
And yet "pap smear" and "scat queen" scan the same as each other. Read them together: pap smear scat queen. Pap queen scat smear. Pap scream scat queer. Scat stream spat smear. Scat dream pap's queer. You could go on like that for a long time.
And: how come I never see the third 'o' dropped from onomatopoeic? Most other English words with an oe diphthong, it gets shortened to 'e'. So I would expect to see onomatopeic -- is this usage standard and I just don't read enough English composition textbooks?
re: slut, slattern etc. I'm fascinated by the close linking of untidy with immoral in all the traditional meanings. Actually Becks used the term that way(untidy, negligent and incompetent housekeeping) just a couple of days ago, it persists, although I think the culture is in the process of decoupling these concepts. Am I wrong? I don't remember the concepts being linked when I was growing up, but I was a boy, what did I know?
Hey Weiner, this post is totally for you.
I had the same experience with Anita Brookner's Bay of Angels I think it was. Anyway, what the commenter said about reading them in The New Yorker. Runaway isn't top-form, so I am unwilling to declare unequivocally that drunkenbee sucks.
Alice Munro has, however, written a few stories that would go great in a mystery anthology that wasn't too purist about form: "Fits" especially (which I found utterly gripping), "Something I've Been Meaning To Tell You," "The Love of a Good Woman."
Aggie.
A lot of my colleagues used the slow transformation of "huswife" into "hussy" as a teaching exercise.
No, "trans-urethral resectioning" just sounds clinical. Whereas "pap smear" has the flat a, the double p, and the lovely sound of "smear" in it. Yukko.
You could instead get a pap schmeer, in which they spread a dollop of cream cheese across your rack.
I invented the word "schmear" as applied to bagel spreads.
Call the Lab Supply place; we're out of Petri bagels.
To Becks and her issue I leave nothing, for reasons I deem sufficient.
But she used a c
Maybe, but ac told me it was all worth it.
Hey, remember "schwing"?
Ah, junior high.
Hey, remember "schwing"? Ah, junior high.
There are drugs that would allow you to achieve erections again, you know.
40 -- you'd know all about that, I guess.
42 - Of course. I work in the pharma industry.
Where's that blacklist?
Sorry, I don't know from Schwing. Context suggests a relation to my coinage, U&OEs. Am I right?
Pharma pharma bo barma
banana fana fo farma
fe fy mo marma
Pharma!
By what criteria would schwing evaluate a site as nice?
Is anyone else mildly creeped out by the new Cialis commercial, where the nice elderly couple is about to dash upstairs for some beautiful pharmaceutically-enabled love-making, but are interrupted by the doorbell? And it's their children and grandchildren? And so they have to go hug their family and play in the yard, and the whole time, I'm shouting at the TV, "Does no one notice grandpa's erection?!"
Is anyone else mildly creeped out by the new [redacted name of erectile dysfunction drug] commercial, where the nice elderly couple is about to dash upstairs for some beautiful pharmaceutically-enabled love-making, but are interrupted by the doorbell? And it's their children and grandchildren? And so they have to go hug their family and play in the yard, and the whole time, I'm shouting at the TV, "Does no one notice grandpa's erection?!"
I don't think I've seen that one; you might try the slash delimiters style of disguising, at least from mechanical searches, what drug you're talking about. I've never seen humor in ads for such products before. The Cialis adds have a pleasant way of making lovemaking between older people attractive, but not funny.
I don't think I've seen that one; you might try the slash delimiters style of disguising, at least from mechanical searches, what drug you're talking about. I've never seen humor in ads for such products before. The Ci/ali/s adds have a pleasant way of making lovemaking between older people attractive, but not funny.
ac told me it was all worth it
As long as it didn't involve a pap smear, it's ok.
53 - This installment of Dating Advice from ac was brought to you by Eli Lilly, the market leader in schwing enhancement medications.
52: Oh absolutely, the rest of the ad is lovely, and the nice couple goes for drives to scenic lighthouses, and they relax side by side in matching copper bathtubs and watch the sun go down, and he reaches over and gently takes her hand, and thanks to the C-drug you mention above, he'll be ready, whenever, and that's all just peachy.
But... the grandchildren! Weird.
55: Oh, right! I remember the ad now, the implication being that the drugs that just immediately spring the schwing have drawbacks.
But... the grandchildren!
"Hooray! Grandpa's ready for horseshoes!"
I guess it's the same ad I have seen, but I never picked up on that before. Guess I never knew that the effect was as direct, as U&OE as this discussion implies. I was under the impression that the selling point was that it was not like that, merely shall we say, enabling.
We're all a bit young to have experienced this; what says big Pharma?
That's the point of the ad: that their drug enables schwinging when you want it, not just uncontrollably for the next couple of hours, like their unnamed competitor drug.
The only person I've talked to who's admitted to using Viagra was this one guy a roommate met on Nerve.com who worked as a pharmacologist and sampled every drug that the company made. He was very very thin, so the Viagra made all the blood rush out of his head into his penis and he lost consciousness immediately. When he came to, IIRC, he had a gigantic erection and a blinding headache.
I could see how a more, um, sensitive? formulation could be marketable.
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Surprised 59 got through; has the term become generic?
This installment of Dating Advice from ac
I also suggest staying away from coffee enemas. At least on the first date.
27: PK has a book of supposedly traditional Chinese rhymes, one of which is:
The tidy woman sweeps the floor,
She sweeps the dust all out the door,
Her little home is always neat,
And filled with happiness, and sweet.
The lazy woman something something, which ends with she has pigs in her house.
Ironically, though, in the accompanying illustration, both women are smiling.
Yeah, but the woman with the pigs has nothing against her morals, does she? I think my guess is that lazy girls were presumed to be tempted by a life of sin because of their loathing of housekeeping, analagous to the boy, like Galbraith said the farmers in Ontario said during WWI, who was "tired of doing chores." The behavior threatens the social order.
Well, in the poem her household is disorderly and unhappy. I don't think it's implied that she's a slut, though.
Come to think of it, maybe that's why the old guy in Oklahoma doesn't want any pig-worshippers.
Good housekeeping is an essential part of civil defense preparedness. Wouldn't you rather live in The House in the Middle?
He was very very thin, so the Viagra made all the blood rush out of his head into his penis and he lost consciousness immediately. When he came to, IIRC, he had a gigantic erection and a blinding headache.
That sounds bizarre. Surely the guy must have had an erection before without losing consciousness? And I don't think Viagra produces an erection by itself, either -- my understanding is that the person taking it only gets an erection if he's sexually aroused by something.
AMG only gives Merkin 2 1/2 lousy stars, but it is a much better piece of soft psych than that.
Well, the way I was raised slovenliness and immorality were inextricably bound. But promiscuity and immorality wasn't.
Surely the guy must have had an erection before without losing consciousness?
Not everybody possesses your superhuman powers, Frederick.
I remember hearing a story of the oversized(tm) passing out, and needing reduction surgery to correct this, but I've never seen this written up. The vi/ag/ra story seems implausible, unless the guy wasn't otherwise having erections.
Maybe he was exaggerating. It was his second or third date with my roommate and the story came up during dinnertime "So what do you do?" kind of chitchat. The way he told it and I remember it, though, he was just sorta sitting around at work, took the pill, and passed right out. But maybe there was some wanking involved.
But wanking shouldn't matter, unless I'm wrong that these drugs merely enable erections, not make them bigger/draw more blood. I suppose he might have been boarderline due to the thinness you mentioned, so that if there really is a difference in engorgement it could happen. I defer to the experts.