It's ok, but its parent Overheard in New York is way better.
I think this was my favorite anecdote of those I read.
Yeah, w/d's site is more consistently hilarious.
I liked the one about the solar flares.
How's it compare to Overheard in San Francisco?
I'm part of a group at work that is performing a big market analysis to present recommendations to the BoD regarding strategic planning. We had our first meeting as a group last week, and it was solely to establish working rules for the group, etc. As we hammered out guidelines regarding consensus, minority opinions, and the like, the facilitator of the meeting said the following: "So, does the magic bean trap door bring you up to true happiness on this point?"
Amazingly, this was completely on-topic and struck nobody (except me, I guess) as odd until I read it back at the end of the meeting.
I have a good overheard in SF, actually.
I was at David's Deli once (highly recommended; order the beehive for dessert) and there was a suited businessman who popped in the door to announce, in a tone of outrage, "there's a homeless guy outside peeing on your building!" The person he reported it to was standing at the cash register by the counter, with a long line of people waiting to pay and/or buy take-out pastry. She was a youngish woman, and she kind of looked at him like "what do you expect me to do about it?" and said, "um, okay."
Businessman: "Aren't you going to stop him?!?
Clerk (clearly meaning, "no"): "Uh, sure, as soon as I'm done with these customers."
Businessman: "It'll be too late!! Look, he's already leaving!!!
Clerk: . . .
Businessman (exasperated, to customers): Doesn't anyone care?
Customers, collectively: . . .
Me (thinking): It's SF. No one gives a shit, and where else is the guy gonna pee?
Businessman: God, this is what's wrong with this damn city.
Then he stormed out and, I think, yelled at the homeless guy himself.
Aside: Tia, if you use <p> or <br> tags instead of carriage returns in your blockquotes, they will maintain consistent formatting.
Drunk guy: Lemme get a bacon, egg, and cheese.
Cashier: Sorry, we don't have bacon.
Drunk guy: Can I have it on a bagel then?
Cashier: That's not the problem. We don't have any bacon.
Drunk guy: Can I just have a bacon, egg and cheese?
Cashier: Sir, there is no bacon, ok?
Drunk guy: Can I just have your number then?
Overheard in NY is much better, but the line totally fit "in the Office".
i feel trés chic being the one introducing you to this, Tia- normally I'm on the back end of the curve on this sort of thing...
Thanks apo. I'll fix it. I never knew what I was doing wrong. I find Overheard in the Office funnier, actually. The OiNY's seem to usually arise out of people being drunk or crass, whereas the office ones are funny to be because they involve ridiculous behavior in a setting where behavior is theoretically restrained, and either people are ingnoring the restraints or they're being even stupider because of them.
Although the two I quoted weren't examples of what I just said was funny; they were examples of actual wit on the part of one of the participants, whereas few of the OiNY's were.
Someone broke into the email of one of my co-workers today, and sent a notice around to all the managers that she was having an affair with a member of the custodial staff, and that she regretted all the trouble this had caused, but she loved him.
I thought it was real, it was written subtly enough to be just about plausible, and I was blinking and reading it over and over. Then I was at a meeting with her later, and she explained it was a hoax. But still: wonder what's going on at that office.
I work in a Spanish-speaking section of the office, and English-speaking office types often walk through and spout some Spanish obscenity we taught them, not even really realizing what they're saying, thinking they're being witty and cute.
I don't even notice it anymore, until a new person---especially a native speaker---goes pale after hearing a manager yell out "ˇPuta madre santa mierda de la concha!"
This is my best one, from a few years ago, when I was at the Bronx Zoo during their holiday light display.
Father: Look, honey, there are three camels there, just like the camels that brought the wise men to visit the baby Jesus!
11-Year Old Daughter: Dad, we're Jewish.
Guess what, the woman I mentioned in 14 was having an affair with a member of the custodial staff. The email was not sent by her but its contents were true. She was trying to deny it yesterday and ride it out, but then resigned this morning.
Was it the fact of the affair or his being a member of the custodial staff that was so shameful? I mean, why should she have resigned over this?
She was his supervisor, he was undoubtedly the lowest income/job level person she supervises so it looks incredibly inappropriate. He is young, doesn't speak English that well, is a recent immigrant, so it may even smack of exploitation. And that the fake email was probably hugely embarrassing. If you are having an affair, perhaps best not for every single member of top management to know about it.
It may be an interesting story, this love affair, what really went on, but doesn't stand a whole lot of scrutiny.
Her being his supervisor does change the dynamic.
I had the same question, but probably she just resigned because she was embarrassed at being the focus of office scandal. I'd assume. Having been in a remarkably similar situation, actually.
Of course, I didn't quit, because I'm a stone-cold bitch, but hey. Not everyone can hack it.
The spirit of ogged lives on. By which I mean no one is talking about the Seinfeld episode where Elaine got George a job in her office, he immediately started sleeping with the cleaning lady, and was fired because of it.
Okay, not *that* similar.
Bitch doesn't actually supervise any of the janitors she fucks.
Apo, language! "Custodians".
Custodian sounds too clinical.
No, if you want hot, dirty office action, it has to be a janitor.
Typing this from the boiler room, btw.
A janitaur would be even better.
No, the guy I was supervising and fucking wasn't ultimately responsible to me, even though he worked under me (yuk, yuk). And when I quit I recommended that he be given my job because frankly he was better at it than I was. Of course, they didn't follow my recommendation because, god forbid, he didn't have a college degree!
God, I hated that job.
In vaguely related news, a friend just emailed: "i mentioned to you that i'm interviewing for a position at [company X], right? well i just got off the phone with the person arranging it, and it turns out one of the people interviewing me is [random guy from college]!! i think i may have had sex with him senior year!!!! the interview won't be too weird, will it?"