You take it, ac. I'm going to have to take a phone call in a bit that will put me out for half an hour or so.
Did you play a fictional character able to fix broken juke boxes in an orignal, amusing manner?
5: Don't trust her answer on that one. She could be a liar.
Are you a man who fucks the shit out of bears?
Are you a cantankerous, truck-driving billionaire entrepeneur?
14: I don't know. Woolworth? Was there even a Woolworth behind the store?
16: Maybe I don't understand the rules. Anybody have a link?
Are you, like, the awesomest basketball coach ever?
16: Oh, ac, you lucky, lucky childless person. I've heard that song at least 100 times in the past three months.
Have you spent the last six decades as Plastic Man's affably buffoonish comedy sidekick?
Are you a smug basketball star?
Missed the bearfucking question. No, I'm not George Washington?
This is just to say
Seriously, did you eat
My plums?
Are you a former 60s TV kitch icon whose biggest role now is a mayor?
13: I was just saying you stumped me, you get to ask a second order question now.
21: No idea.
22: No basketball person coming to mind.
Did a girl and her little dog take your shoes?
Did a girl and her little dog take your shoes?
Rules. And click through to the post linked there.
Omigod, I should totally be able to come up with a W fag. Wait...
17: You are not Sam Walton
Hmm... had to pick W, didn't you?
Did you pit your Great Glass Elevator in battle against the vermicious knids?
19: Could we have a moratorium on basketball questions?
27: you must not by Jiri Welsch. Are you a currently living person?
Did a girl and her little dog take your shoes?
Did you ever see with eye serene the very pulse of the machine?
But you're going to know all the literary W's. Just tell me I get a first order already.
39-No, I'm not the Wicked Witch of the West.
Do you sound your barbaric yawp?
27: I guess you're not Woozy Winks.
Are you male?
Okay then, are you a man?
sam k, you want to phrase this as, "So then you're not [intended answer to second-order question]. Then [first-order question]"
Text has a second order, and so, dammit, does B. Can't think of any fags at the moment.
Also, it isn't in the rules to which we've linked, but Googling is frowned upon.
Were you appointed by Nixon?
Are you a dead, hitler loving cartooner?
Do your schnozberries taste like schnozberries?
You're not Oscar Wilde. Amazing.
Okay, so you're a dead man. I am forced, therefore, to ask if you are also white.
You're not John Wooden. Are you fictional?
Are you a TV character who is implausibly ass-kicking for any 50-something in tight jeans and cowboy boots?
Do you run through the town in your pajamas?
Holy shit, I can't believe I missed Oscar. It's the pressure.
Ah fuck, never mind 56 -- it is the result of crossed memory wires.
24 and 40 could need your cursory negation.
OMG -- I never knew that about text!
And for my first-order question from 17:
Were you born after 1850?
Can they never take your freedom?
Does that Texas Ranger fellow's name begin with a W?
It's only when Admiral Togo wakes me up at night. I'm dealing with it.
Did you found a little league?
Did you smoke cigars and drink lots of brandy during wartime?
Are you a philosopher who lives in the middle of nowhere, USA, and owns a tortoiseshell cat?
So you're not William Carlos Williams. Are you fictional?
Shoot. Can I rephrase that? Are you a politician?
Did you commit an act of genocide without quite realizing it?
Don't know the dead, Hitler-loving cartoonist, and can't, for the moment, think of Ws appointed by Nixon.
25, 70 - You're not Adam West
61, 74 - I assume so, it's called Walker, Texas Ranger. Does that count for another first order?
I'll wait for the answer to 72 before I ask any more first-orders
dead, Hitler-loving cartoonist = Walt Disney
Did you beseech the oysters to walk with you along the briny beach?
I feel that B is asking me things I totally should know, but can't recall.
Do I get a second order for 82, then? Which yeah, you should totally know.
Did you say to never, never, never give in?
Is it the rule that it's got to be last names?
90: The "D" in Disney is the operative letter in that, though.
Did you win a prize for helping determine the three-dimensional structure of biological macromolecules in solution?
82 - Damn, I was just about to go for that one
Do you head up your very own pantheon?
100: No, ok this shows just how much I'm not googling: who is in charge of the Nordic pantheon, is it Woden?
67: Does this mean I get a yes or no question?
25, 70 - Were you British by birth?
61, 74 - Were you born after 1500?
I forget where it is, but I'm not William Wallace either--the freedom question.
No, J, you don't. It's an in-joke. I called text Wee Willie Winkie on my blog the other day.
109: Oops, my bad. Thanks for the explanation.
107: Yes, I'm British by birth.
And: Yes, I was born after 1500.
Obviously you're not Bertie Wooster, but what do you know of him?
Genocide by accident, genocide by accident...
Also don't know 77, the little league question.
Were you the last king of Prussia?
You're not Winston, then.
I'll let JAC have my second-order, since he (she? whatever) thought of the same person and since Mr. B. just walked in and asked me to unload his sod.
Aha! You are not Ender Wiggins.
Second Order: Did you publish any books?
125: Does that count? His last name started with an S.
119: So you must not be Glenn "Pop" Warner. Lemme see... real dead white British male, not a politician, somewhere in between the 16th C. and mid-19th, ... are you an author?
Would the last king of Prussia be a Wilhelm?
125 -- the euphemisms are getting more and more esoteric.
Have someone in my office--give me a sec.
Did you look out on the feast of Stephen?
104 -- I've allus seen it spelled Wotan but close enough.
Yes, I'm an author, and I have published books.
Did you beat a little general at WC?
May I assume from 122 that you do not know Bertie Wooster?
Oh! D'oh -- allow me to rephrase the question in 128? Or maybe not as you have already answered it? If I can I would ask if you were a poet.
Re-posting 40: Did you ever see with eye serene the very pulse of the machine?
Pwn3d by 143? I voluntarily downgrade my status to that of Armsmasher.
Don't know the little general thing, either.
Do you believe criminals are a cowardly and superstitious lot?
Do you have as a master gesture, picking your nose?
127 - Oh yeah, Winston Smith shouldn't really count. Sorry.
Are you a Houston MC and DJ who broke out nationally in the last couple years?
Why are you reposting 40?
And for 124: No, I'm not Wodehouse.
Did you imagine going to the moon?
Are you of the opinion that we come trailing clouds of glory from God who is our home?
Did you write about little cow people in the future?
148: No, I'm not Evelyn Waugh.
154: No, I'm not Wollestonecraft.
http://www.unfogged.com/cgi-sys/cgiwrap/unfogged/managed-mt/mt-comments.cgi?entry_id=5328#392323
Er, maybe martians shooting at us?
156 I'm saying Wells again, and maybe you said that yourself in that link I didn't follow.
Did you write Mistress Masham's Repose?
162: I guess you're not Bruce Wayne.
Were you a philosopher?
So you must not be Ralph Wiggum. Are you a novelist?
Did you write an early gothic thriller?
153, 162 - You're not Paul Wall.
Were you born after 1700?
I was born after 1700.
No, I'm not a novelist.
I'm having this vision right now of us all in the swimming pool, ac is blindfolded and calling out "Botti!" to which we all have to reply "Celli!" until she is able to tag one of us.
You're not Wordsworth. What genres remain? Are you a playwright?
To say I have published books is not to say I'm a creative writer. No, I'm not a playwright.
Surely I can come up with someone who fishes. Er...
So you're not Izaac Walton. Are you a scientist?
Oh I am perplexed. Did you create the west coast offense?
Is a unit of measurement named after you?
No, I'm not a chemist. Or, at least, not known for that.
Are you a bellicose alien officer on a mostly-human spaceship crew?
Are you likely to get steamed wqhen I guess your electrical name?
Are you likely to get steamed when I guess your electrical name?
191 - You're not Worf.
Were you a physicist?
I'm having this vision right now of zombies offering an me the choice either to play Botticelli or have my brains eaten, and then double-crossing me and eating my brains anyway. But then it's not Botticelli. It's apple butter. And it's not zombies. It's my mother.
No, I'm not a physicist. Or, again, not known for that. Don't know how much chemistry or physics went into my training.
199: Another complaint about my style of play?
Did you co-discover Natural Selection with your buddy Chuck D?
Are you going all the way to Baltimore and running out of time?
203: The way I play is to say yes when someone guesses me on a 1st order. So yes, I am!
199 - Are you saying your mom likes apple butter? Because that's just disgusting.
197:Not who I was thinking of, but it works. Are you the son of a prime minister and also author of an early gothic thriller?
http://www.unfogged.com/cgi-sys/cgiwrap/unfogged/managed-mt/mt-comments.cgi?entry_id=5328#392371
Did you help build the Blutcher?
206
Woo Hoo! And what's the name of this guy again?
Another complaint about my style of play?
No, just goofing off. Sorry.
Did you invent an engine?
But feel free to tell me the answers to those 1st orders, which I would not have gotten.
Does the fact that someone got mean no pikes and torches? How many people know who it is?
Are you saying your mom likes apple butter? Because that's just disgusting.
Reading comprehension? My mom likes brains. More enlightenment here.
216 to 214: correcting my second paragraph.
It's a sad story. He was all set to publish a paper on natural selection before Darwin, but made the mistake of sending it to Darwin. So that didn't quite happen.
ac - To be fair to Darwin he'd been sitting on the discovery for 20 years. After Wallace sent him the paper he rushed to print Origin of Species. He did acknowledge that Wallace figured it out to, it wasn't like the Newton/Leibniz fight.
So Darwin was a total fraud then? He ought not to get so much attention from the preachers et al.
I think the reason it wasn't like Newton/Leibniz was that Wallace was self-effacing.
His journals and letters from the era are pretty sad.
So Wallace had the theory and Darwin had all the data?
229 - Plus Darwin didn't try to write the whole thing in impenetrable code just to stop others from using his discovery.
Jeez, you heard all sorts of things about how much of an ass Newton was among the Trinity math fellows.
Darwin's theory was all worked out, Wallace's sketchier. But he would have beaten him to the presses, if he hadn't sent the paper to Darwin first.
But would the presses have published it? Without all of Darwin's data that backed it up, I mean.
He seemed to think so. But was asking Darwin for a fatal second opinion!
Fatal!
Ok, I can leave the office now. Yay.
You fuckers. You would do fucking Wallace, after I just spent 10 fucking months in fucking Wallacea, and read The Fucking Malay Archipelago umpteen times because it was there and I was bored out of my skull. But you'd do it when I was enjoying a quiet bottle of wine and conversation rather than obsessively checking fucking Unfogged.
Good job.
See, trying to have a life outside the Unfogged comments is deprecated.