come now, ogged... how are we supposed to judge without a picture of you?
I dunno, you've decribed yourself as looking like Jeff Goldblum and Chris Noth, and I wouldn't call that guy much further off that either of the other two. Not that you look all that much like any of the three of them.
That's what other people have said, LB. I, of course, don't think I look like any of them.
That guy does look like an Iranian version of Jeff Goldblum.
Cyrus the Great, it's hard to tell with the helmet and beard. The nose is pretty close, though.
I still contend you look more like Adrian Brody than Chris Noth.
Maybe it is because you wear your collar up, like that guy.
it turns out that she's completely insane.
Or, more likely, she's just hitting on you. Be nice.
I bet Cyrus the Great had similar scars, though- swordfights were tough.
They do have similar noses. Hard to judge the rest with the helmet and facial hair.
Your nose is a lot beakier than that Cyrus dude, though.
it turns out that she's completely insane. I'm not sure how to break it to her
The former dictates the latter. There's probably a variation on the rule (from R.A.H.?) "Don't pick with fights with anyone you don't know, they might be crazier than you are" that covers people you already suspect.
9: You know, if this is possible at all, it is a timehonored technique for hitting on someone. The Lobster Hypnotizer made a move on me after an inordinate amount of time babbling about how much I looked like Dana Delaney in the movie we'd just seen. (Not borne out by actual fact.)
Well, he does have a skinny head. I've had people tell me they have seen my twin around town on a few occasions, and I've even met two of them—who looked not at all like me. I can only guess that, like blacks, all us redheads look the same.
She's not hitting on me. We're totally frenemies.
Oh, so there's already tension! She *totally* wants you.
HER: ogged, I've been thinking about how you look, a lot, and I think you look like a celebrated warrior and this other cute guy.
OGGED: You're weird. Fleeing now!
Oy vey. She's not hitting on me; I'd say more, but one ought to keep quiet about work on one's blog.
15: Yeah, the question isn't whether you're frenemies, it's whether she's attractive.
Maybe she's trying to offer you pity sex?
18: And ogged once again backs nervously away from the monster he has created. Remember when you could post to your blog without feeling outnumbered?
1 -- didn't -gg-d post a picture of himself back when he first got his groove on?
23: well, yeah ... but then we'd need a rib-shot of those other two, wouldn't we.
Which of the three of you do you think she'd be most terrified to be seated next to on an airplane?
25: Probably Cyrus the Great, what with being a dessicated corpse and all that.
Ogged, you ignorant slut, she's hitting on you.
Also, Ogged, you should grow your hair out, get your teeth whitened, and grow some stuble so that you can look more like the guy on the right.
26: yeah, but at least there wouldn't be much sexual tension
all us redheads look the same
You mean just like this, right?
26 -- I believe Mr. The Great is way past the "dessicated corpse" phase and has progressed to "benign pile o' bones" -- I would be glad to accompany him on an airplane journey.
29: Or this. But I prefer yours, all things being equal.
26. You're thinking about it all wrong. Cyrus the Great already has his severed head; the other haven't gotten theirs yet.
carrottop's eyes seem abnormally small.
I never thought about it before, but Carrot Top reminds me of Naymond from The Wire. They both have ill-conceived hair, are deeply pitiable, and work in completely disreputable fields that will ultimately destroy them.
Are we sure this post isn't merely to remind us--after his post on Second Life losers--that ogged's good looking? Let's lay wagers on whether his next post is about his athleticism ("I'm swimming again, and faster than ever!"), his courage ("I had cancer, and remained unfazed"), or his intelligence (TBD).
UPDATE: It's come to my attention that I'm very good-looking.
13: Wait, wait, wait. "The Lobster Hypnotizer"? Somebody back up and explain that one for me.
Put the update in the post--it would be funnier. Maybe this blog will get you laid yet, Becks notwithstanding.
I bet if you took cyrus' helmet ff, shaved him, turned him around to face the camera (or rather the engraver), and told him a funny story, he would look just like the guy on the right. She's hitting on you, ogged.
Short term college relationship who claimed to be able to hypnotize lobsters. I never saw him do it. Search on lobster to find it in the archives.
41 -- Hey I was just thinking today "Where's that Strasmangelo Jones? I never see him post lately." Glad to see you have not vanished.
Could he put a brick to sleep also?
Nobody ever says this guy, ogged?
The claim was that you can tell if a lobster is hypnotized because it becomes immobile to the point that you can balance it on a tripod formed by its claws and its face. I do not know if this is true, and never saw it done. But he was from Maine, and so presumably had lots of opportunity to practice.
No, the woman that thinks Ogged looks like either of those pictures.
The claim was that you can tell if a lobster is hypnotized because it becomes immobile to the point that you can balance it on a tripod formed by its claws and its face.
I don't know what's more shocking: that I apparently missed this the first time around or that we haven't had whole threads devoted to lobster hypnotism here.
But then there's this:
you've decribed yourself as looking like Jeff Goldblum and Chris Noth
Now all we need to do is run Jeff Goldblum and Chris Noth through Conan O'Brian's "If They Mated" machine to produce Ogged's secret identity.
Too bad reason isn't funny.
Not bad, B.
1. Resemblance can be relational. My siblings and I don't think we look very alike, but others frequently comment on a strong family resemblance, and sometimes we're even mistaken for each other. (Notwitstanding an 8" height spread.) I don't think other people are crazy so much as they aren't calibrating as finely as we are.
I have also had clients of a different ethnicity repeatedly confuse a co-worker and me -- despite our different hair color and style, height, and build. I suspect it was due to being raised in an ethnically homogenous neighborhood.
2. I would join the chorus, but per 18 I will just point out that it is completely possible for there to be logistical/other factors that would preclude any romance, and yet a frisson of awareness may persist. Per B's point in the loneliness discussion about intimacy being characaterized as sexual, I think chemistry is too, when in reality its presence or absence can affect all our relationships.
Chris Noth? OK, that's way way more of a stretch than these are.
58: You mean because Noth is identifiably masculine in a way these guys aren't?
that's way way more of a stretch than these are
Hey there, PG.
Good thing we got rid of Bob.
(Not to mention lilishahir.)
Wait, is Chris Noth supposed to be attractive now? Because those bags are totally achievable...now, if you'll excuse me, I need to not sleep for three days. Come, Hotness, come!
To reiterate: 'Gee, look at the handsome actor and conqueror of the world I found, and how they look like you!'
That, or she thinks all y'all look alike.
65: If this coworker exists outside of ogged's fevered imagination.
I think the resemblances are vague enough (Cyrus? Noth? Goldblum? the cute actor-boy?) that the explicit awareness of the Persian connection is driving a lot of this. If she didn't know that, there might be lots of other people that would occur to her.
Conversely, given that her search-space has been narrowed to other Persians, you should cheer up--she's not telling you that you look like Ahmadinejad.
What's wrong with looking like Ahmadinejad? He's a very handsome man.
I recall thinking -gg-d looked a lot like Freddie Mercury, the time I met him.
68--
really? I'm surprised to hear it, but I'm in no position to disagree. I can never figure out what makes guys handsome or not, so I defer to others for these judgements.
69: You have made me the happiest commenter on earth.
70: Perhaps we should have some women or gay men weigh in on this, but yeah, I see him as a typical example of a handsome man.
I think he's pretty good looking, but not a super dreamboat. He looks best at angles where it's not as evident how close together his eyes are.
My wife has said that she thinks he's handsome too. I don't get it. He looks like a Flintstones extra.
Sometimes he has a kind of sexy Che thing going.
I like Ahmadi-nejad's wardrobe. He seems to pick some good shirt/jacket/no tie combinations.
69: It's the moustache.
And the penchant for wearing hot pants.
Ogged, she's not hitting on you, or insane: she's being insulting to see if she can get a rise out of you.
This is not, however, to say that he would be a better US president than our current one.
77: Are we talking about ogged or the Ajmenijawhatever?
Ahmadinejad. I don't know what Ogged looks like, and he doesn't act particularly Chelike.
If you say so. So who are the hot male world leaders?
76: He's cute, but that description of him is fucking hilarious.
OK, just googled some photos of Chris Noth. Maybe the hair a bit. But he's so ... old. Comparatively speaking and all.
Freddie Mercury. Heh.
75--
right, things like the closeness of the eyes I can judge, and it's on that basis that I have inferred that he is not an attractive guy.
But this is what has always struck me as baffling about male attractiveness--there is a great deal more imperfection permissible in male models of attractiveness than in female ones.
There are some male actors who I can reliably predict will be good-looking, because their female analogues would be good-looking (mostly the pretty-boys, e.g. Pitt, Cruise, Redford). And they pass easy tests of facial symmetry, wide spacing of the eyes, high cheek bones--thing that I can check fairly mechanically despite having no intuitive feel for what's good looking.
But then there are guys that I never in a million years would have predicted would be heart-throbs, and whose female analogues would (I'm pretty sure) never make it in the movies. Nick Cage? Bruce Willis? What's that about? Who knows? For whatever reason, they are found to be attractive.
This is why with somebody like Ahmadinejad I think: okay, seems to me that he fails on some fairly straightforward mechanical tests. But--my proxy heuristics for this are *really* inaccurate, so I'll take anyone's word who has an opinion.
83: I don't know what any of them look like. I think Blair's better looking than people give him credit for being, and the Martin guy of Canada's pretty good-looking. But if Edwards (or Hagel, who I think is even better looking) wins in '08, I think we take the crown.
84: It's funny because it's true.
Edwards (or Hagel, who I think is even better looking)
Seriously. Whole lotta hott there. Hagel would also make the first Republican president since Gerald Ford that I wouldn't consider evil.
I think we take the crown
Hooray! We win superficiality!
But anyway, I think this guy is pretty good-looking, although he isn't going to be holding power much longer.
While researching this question I discovered that the prime minsters of Belgium, Finland, and Hungary all look virtually identical, and all look like total dorks.
Yuschenko was pretty handsome before they poisoned him.
I'd like to revise 90 to say that Ferenc Gyurcsany actually looks a lot cooler than Guy Verhofstadt or the Finnish guy. He looks like John Oliver from the Daily Show. Still a dork though.
91: Jeebus. He really was good looking.
I think Edwards has been a Most Beautiful Person in People Magazine, but not Hagel. Liberal bias?
Japan took a huge drop in the rankings when Shinzo Abe replaced Junichiro Koizumi. I mean, really.
ac's redhead has tomwaitsian lips.
You know, I'm one of those weird people who visualizes people I haven't met ,or seen pictures of, as very vague shadowy humanoid silhouettes overlaid with giant, sesame-street style 3D sculptures of their name written out, so to me, until now, ogged has been, well,
OGGED
Now the shadowy silhouette is suddenly intermixed with intermixing transparent projections of this actor, Chris Noth and Jeff Goldblum, the giant OGGED fading a bit, and it's a little trippy.
I hadn't realized how many of you actually know each other in real life, and how hot Ogged is. Now I'm even more envious about never making it to these big meetups.
That sounded more like Barry White than Freddie Mercury.
That's so fucking wrong. I bet Saheli's a terrorist. (Just kidding, G-man.)
the best looking american politician lost his senate race a few weeks ago.
You know, I don't think it would be that difficult for ogged and Saheli to meet each other...
I refer of course to This handsome guy.
91. christ: the poison even changed his hair color.
It should be obvious that text was actually referring to the Cadillac of men shown in this photo.
I hadn't realized how many of you actually know each other in real life, and how hot Ogged is. Now I'm even more envious about never making it to these big meetups.
What am I, chopped liver?
I feel suddenly inadequate for not having a list of hot world leaders in my head.
That said, none of the candidates named in this thread would be on it.
Apostropher, what does it say about you that I saw a site search for thatcher bhutto and knew it was you even before I saw the North Carolina IP address?
102: Well, hopefully one day, but apparently I keep missing out on the big opportunities.
105: Gyah. That's going ot give me nightmares.
106: :-D But see, the coolness of spontaneous BART meetups only increases my expectation that the big parties are Awesomeness Squared. :-) Not to mention that Becks is as excellent an in-person hostess as she is a webmistress.
108: What does it say about you, Ogged?
I'm sure you're itching to tell me, B.
Nope. Not a thing in my pretty little head.
xoxoxox!
109 - Awww, thanks! And in a better world, you would have already had your chance to meet Ogged. Fucking cancer. And you would have had your chance to meet w-lfs-n. Fucking w-lfs-n.
Fucking cancer.
Fucking w-lfs-n.
Do we have to choose?
You only get one, Standpipe. Don't be greedy.
People do have quite freaky ideas about who people resemble, and as has been repeated a lot above, some people just pick people who they think will be flattering to the person they are talking to ... 'You really look like $foo' where $foo is someone hot.
Or they latch on some feature -- when I had long hair I was repeatedly told I looked like two particular rock singers. I looked nothing like 'em, I just had the same hair.
That said, my wife does look like Michelle Williams -- even though she thinks I am on crack for thinking that.
91, 93: Yeah, I was oddly disturbed by that. Poisoning is one thing, but deliberately (maybe?) disfiguring a pretty person seems weirdly extra-unpleasant. Feeling this way makes me terribly shallow, I'm certain.
118: Me too. Ukraine is hardcore.
118: Disfiguring an ugly person is also unpleasant, just sayin.
Disfiguring an ugly person
From a utilitarian perspective this has no impact on the world.
The bitzer clan and I will storm your ramparts.
120: Agreed.
A friend of mine and I are frequently mistaken for one another and asked if we are sisters or twins, even though from our own point of view we look nothing alike. I agree with 57 that the issue usually rests on how finely grained peoples' observations and comparisons are. Also, I think (though this doesn't apply so much to the example in the post itself) that people often observe similarities in behavior, such as shared intonational patterns, gestures, and so on, and attribute them to similarities of static physical features.
Ok, I fucking know that guy in the second picture. Or at least I know a guy who's his twin. Are we sure that guy's not a Broadway conductor/piano player? Who serves as musical director for the occasional white supremacist show?
Broadway conductor/piano player
Wow -- -gg-d is certainly branching out.
107: But think of all the neurons you haven't totally wasted until just now.
He looks like a Flintstones extra.
Funny because it's true, indeed. Good eye.
Who serves as musical director for the occasional white supremacist show?
This part, on the other hand, has always been a hobby of -gg-d's.
Eh, Ahmadinejad is decent-looking, though his hair is a little too Steve Carrell. Chuck Hagel gets points for being a handsome Republican without being Republican-handsome. (Republican-handsome being that clean-cut businessy sort of look that might seem good-looking at very first glance, a reaction which is immediately overridden by the certainty that if he accidentally knocked you up, he'd totally make you carry the baby to term.)
