When you said "turned against me," I was at first picturing a Fontana Labs sandwich. Naturally the warmth issues confused me. Yes, Ogged is pretty skinny, but when two bodies are up against you, that's still pretty warm no matter who it is.

Does anyone know what Labs is talking about?

And doesn't, or oughtn't, he mean "gin and vermouth"?

Also, I had the same thought as Kotsko.

I assume he's referring to this.

I think he's talking about the Jolie controversy. He's wrong, and he should get back to work.

The Gayatollah speaks vaguely, from under a veil of mystery. We mustn't try to parse his words for original intent.

4 may be the most subtle linkage I've ever encountered. Good show, man!

alameida's "duh" is the gut-shot, I'm assuming. However, now that everyone (gay and straight alike! beauty doesn't discriminate!) has met alameida, this sentence threatens to make that gut-shot--and maybe even one a little further south--worth it:

she is incredibly, astoundingly hott in a peculiar rapacious/sex-with-teh-crazies-is-great way

I aimed to cross seven lines I shouldn't have. Am I in the ballpark?

that depends on whether your gut-shot crossed lines that are in the ball-park, or maybe just some lines painted on the parking-lot surrounding it.
which is to say--i have no idea what you're talking about, but that does not prevent me from seeing that there are many metaphors in play here, and perhaps some of them not playing nicely with others.
(i'll hazard a guess: are you suggesting that alameida herself fits the description she gave of jolie? since i'm among the everyone who have *not* met her, i have no idea si elle soit jolie ou non.)

Thanks, Grover. I am also among those who have not met alameida, so I have no opinion on the rest of your comment.

Alameida's hottness is not to be underestimated.

I have never met Alameida. I did drive on The Alameida today. It didn't strike me as particularly hott.

1. Did you mean The Alameda?

2. Did you bring empanadas for everyone?

1. There are alamedas all over the place.

2. Whence the i in alameida? I've never understood it.

I think an earlier iteration of the "About Alameida" page had an explanation.

How many iterations of that page have there been?

Hedgical Trevor? How long do those things live, anyway?

Hedgehogs have a relatively long lifespan for their size (a mouse is 2 years and a large rat is 3-5 years). Larger species of hedgehogs live 4-7 years in the wild (some have been recorded up to 16 years). Smaller species live 2-4 years (4-7 in captivity). Lack of predators and controlled diet contribute to a longer lifespan in captivity.

Ok then.

15: beats me.

At least three, it would seem.

OT: Time Bandits disappoints so far.

3 martinis on an empty stomach, two glasses of red wine with dinner, and a scotch on the rocks. How are you guys?

I had four scones and some sunchokes, but I'm holding up ok.

four scones

That can't be good. Think of the trans-fats.

Won't somebody please think of the trans-fats?

Slol, you've been drunk a lot lately, have you not?

Hey, that's only 2/3 a stick of butter and 1/3 cup of cream.

Lentil soup earlier, followed by some torrone, now at last a bourbon on the rocks while engaging in a little DS Lite Animal Crossing. Maybe I'll have a little bowl of potato chips to go with it.

Slol, you've been drunk a lot lately, have you not?

It's the most wonderful time of the year, ogged.

Many beers with catherine before heading to a party, where the host was serving homemade pizzas. He was serving Georgian wine; he'd heard about it on NPR. I abstained but nevertheless here am I, Becks style, listening to Sufjan Stevens and not finishing the book I meant to finish tonight.

Woo, hook 'em!

I think I've read about five pages since returning from DC.

I just got back from a really good concert by a band made up of some friends of mine. Not Becks-style at all.

Also, it's snowing again.

Went outside a few minutes ago and thought to myself, "christ it's cold out here."

Now that I'm back in, I check the national weather service. Lo and behold, it's 7 godamn degress out there. SEVEN.

WHAT. THE. FUCK.

7 in F I assume.

I generally read alameida as Almeida.

Bernardo O'Higgins is a great name. Dirk is my favourite name at the moment (Dirk Benedict is on Celebrity Big Brother here), but Bernardo O'Higgins is a close second.

Count your blessings, gswift. It's 70 degrees here today and yesterday I picked several very confused daffodils that came up in the yard. I've begun to think that global warming has moved North Carolina permanently out of the winter weather zone, and that would make me sadder than sad.

The redbuds and even some crab-apples are flowering up here in Boston.

Pissed off Roberta says that she picked the daffodils, dammit.

My sister-in-law makes the best pie in P*****d. Pie-lovers come from miles around to pay an exorbitant price for her pies. This is an authentic pie recipe they crossed the Great Plains in a covered wagon. Her secret ingredient? Crisco. Butter doesn't work. Lard doesn't work. Olive oil doesn't work. Nothing. Only trans-fats work.

They hired a professional cook, and the new cook automatically, reflexively, replaced the Crisco with butter. They had to fire her. Her crusts were no good. The customers noticed. They didn't know what the difference was, though. (But Vegans love transfats.)

You're probably wondering how there could be Crisco on the covered wagon, but that's a silly question.

What you say about Crisco and pie crusts is true. There is a "no-trans-fat" Crisco, though. Has your sister-in-law tried it to see if it works for texture?

Crisco was invented in 1910, before you guys were born. Covered wagons were still in service until 1914, when the Great War made their use seem unpatriotic. Crisco was also an enormous boon to kosher cooks.

You're evading the question.

Are you anti-Semitic? As soon as I mention kosher, you get huffy on me.

What kind of surname do you think "lernr" is, J**n?

Also, I really, seriously, would like to know, having recently learned to feel guilty about the flaky/tender texture of my pie-crusts, which I hear is due, and due only, to their trans-fatty deadliness.

This is an authentic pie recipe

This makes me think that its claim to fame is that it actually makes pies, as advertised. Try this recipe -- it never produces cakes, or Ritz cracker mock apple pie, or a pile of Legos!

Lies, all lies. It's easier to make a flaky crust with Crisco, but lard works nicely too, and a properly flaky butter crust is, while trickier, a mere matter of technique.

Even the most authentic of pie recipes can go awry; the nature of probability being what it is, it's only a matter of time. Only an emergency souffle saved Albert and Michel Roux's third Michelin star when one of their recipes, which had previously proven entirely authentic in the production of tarte citron, came out of the oven a fine, chilled vichysoisse. Ever since Le Gavroche has had an official policy of monitoring quantum events in the patissier's section of the kitchen.

I actually have had little problem with an all-butter crust but it doesn't taste the same.

Pie is an American dish. Testimony about pies should not be accepted from Irish health nuts. The Irish are good at potatos and various other roots which they grub up from the dirt.

As if lard and butter are healthy.

48 reminds me of the Sartre Cookbook, for some reason.

Now that I'm back in, I check the national weather service. Lo and behold, it's 7 godamn degress out there. SEVEN.

Everything's all awry with the weather, then, because I saw people dining al fresco last night at 8pm. I live in New York.

34, 37: Chicago is downright balmy. I wore shorts yesterday.

21: Are you fucking insane!?!? Time Bandits (Terry Gilliam, 1981) is one of the best childrens' movies ever, and probably one of the best movies ever. It certainly has the best denoument ever. Oh well, there's no accounting for taste.

55: Well, yes, I am fucking insane. It got a bit better, but it wasn't as good as I had recalled.

Specifically, I can see how the historical tie-ins could be good for kids ("Ooh! That's why I should read about old dead men!"). The God/good-vs.-evil stuff was a bit overwrought, though.

I just didn't find it as sharp as I had remembered.

while irish persons cannot be trusted on matters culinary, and have sometimes falsely given the name of 'pie' to things containing spare bits of birds and mammals, lb is right that good crusts can contain various proportions of butter.
myself, i don't like an all-butter crust; more like half butter half crisco.
the new king arthur baking book has excellent instructions on the whole thing. so good that i can follow them and make a very passable pie, e.g. better than anything you'll find at a restaurant.
sadly, i still cannot make a crust as good as those made by my wife, but by gum i'll keep trying.
olive oil is, of course, an abomination in pie crusts, though miraculous in nearly all else.

i remember once reading a letter by an early pioneer in the oregon territory reveling in the abundance of pies to be found there. glad the tradition is kept.

55, 56, 57: You know, TB was one of my favorite movies ever, and when I rented it a while back, I thought it had suffered too. I'm not sure why -- I think maybe it looks retrospectively cliched, because it got imitated over the last twenty years?

But it's still a wonderful movie.

But it's still a wonderful movie.

Oh, certainly, and I still enjoyed it. I think I just had my expectations too high, possibly for the reasons you cite.

I also like pies and will happily evaluate any and all pie crusts that anyone wishes to send me.

olive oil is, of course, an abomination in pie crusts, though miraculous in nearly all else.

For example, pizza dough.

61
totally. neither butter nor lard shall ye put into pizza crusts, nay nor the thing that is called crisco; for it is an abomination.

further evidence of the deep conceptual error in calling pizzas 'pies'. i mean, i know it's sometimes useful to have a count-noun for them--even manny and sal down at the oven do it, saying hey how many pies we got in there?

but basically it reflects the initial anthropological bewilderment of the anglo-saxon mind faced with a food category it didn't recognize, from a culture it didn't trust.

you can call 'em pies, but they ain't pies.

What kind of surname do you think "lernr" is, J**n?

Non-responsive. Everyone knows your name is "slol ernr", since like all jews you grub after teh slol.

52 reminds me of Flowers of Evil: Gardening Advice from Charles Baudelaire, which I have lying around the house somewhere. Now I have to go look for it.

Speaking of flowers, I saw Curse of the Golden Flower last night. Very very bad.

I actually have had little problem with an all-butter crust but it doesn't taste the same.

Meaning it actually tastes the way it should, instead of like some crisco monstrosity.

B's years in Canada have destroyed her tastebuds.

Up there, the nanny state probably says "only butter in piecrusts". And the sheeple go along with it.

I thought the whole point of Time Bandits was that "the good vs. evil stuff was overwrought". Why else make God the public school headmaster and the Devil some kind of campy New Romantic on Halloween? I don't mean to aver that the whole bildungsroman aspect is so original or profound, just that it's hard for me to give credence to a reading that ignores the fact that the film conceives childhood's end as moving from an "age of heroes" to heroes-as-suburban-civil-servants. And "don't touch it: it's pure evil!" is a brilliant line. I guess The Fisher King is what grown-ups are supposed to like?

I don't think I made a single piecrust the whole time I was there, actually. So there, nyah nyah, etc.

I guess The Fisher King is what grown-ups are supposed to like?

God help us if that's true.

I don't think I['ve] made a single piecrust the[my] whole [life]time I was there, actually.

Listen up, youngster. I've been cooking longer than you've been alive.

Actually, that's true. I probably made my first pie crust when Ben was still in diapers.

Now there's an unpleasant chain of associations.

My sister-in-law could wipe all your butts, and make good pies at the same time.

it's hard for me to give credence to a reading that ignores the fact that the film conceives childhood's end as moving from an "age of heroes" to heroes-as-suburban-civil-servants

This is an interesting idea. I hadn't thought of it that way, minneapolitan. Like I said to LB, I think it was just a matter of me expecting something different (I hadn't seen it since childhood). I'd certainly encourage any and all youngsters to see the movie. It's fun.

Well good. (Is this where someone yells "Comity!"?)

i'm all for comity.
even comity about the kinds of shortenings that can be used in pie crusts.
drawing the line at olive oil.
and anything to do with ben's diapers.

68 - Didn't Gilliam say somewhere (maybe in The Battle for Brazil) that the TB goes with Brazil and Munchausen? The imagined inner lives of the young, the middle aged, and the old.

I've never fancied TB, and in fact I refused to watch Willow for a long time because I thought it *was* TB. But maybe I should let my kids watch it.

We just saw Casino Royale. Hmmmmm. Decided whoever edited it should be shot/stabbed/drowned in a lift/exploded. I know it's a Bond film, but it barely made sense.

I've never fancied TB

TB itself I'm not too fond of, but I understand that TB-stricken maidens are very attractive, in a sex-and-death kind of way.

dude, haven't you learned nothing in grad school?
girls with TB are just ill.
girls with *consumption* are very attractive.
any rate, that's what pierre tells me.

Tubercles being far less sexy than waifs and all.

You're right: those are the least sexy mammillaria I've ever seen.

I was expecting "Tubercles" to lead to a picture of a potato in a toga, or something.

oooh, is that what I get for not italicising? Bad me. Funny w-lfs-n.

Am I weird that I liked those tubercles?