Dave, come up with something incendiary to say, quick!
My sexual interest in both Michelle Malkin and cheerleaders just took a nosedive.
I think we all know who's behind this. I'm also pretty sure I can't say his name this early in a thread for some reason, although I haven't yet figured out why.
Now come up with a theory that doesn't come down to "she's nuts" to explain it.
She's fully aware that notoriety pays.
Theory: this tape has been intercepted from one of those custom porn sites where you request your particlar perversion to be filmed. Terms of the deal were not disclosed.
3: You were sexually interested in Michelle Malkin?
I'm glad our Iraq policy is finally getting the middle-school-level scrutiny it deserves. REID UR A L0ZR.
You know, the nuances to this are really something. The way her jumps are all kind of half-assed so her skirt stays down. The way she keeps casting nervous glances to see if the neighbors can see her acting like a loon. The fact that what she's wearing is not at all a cheerleading outfit. What do you think the odds are she has some cheer squad related issues to work out, still?
Did you guys see the vid of Laura Bush replying to the statement "The American people are suffering in this war" with "No one suffers more than the President and me"?
She secretly loves Sadly, No! and wanted to give them some bitchin' new material.
Oh, wait, I know the answer. It's sexism, isn't it? I knew it!
It's pantomime-the-opposite day, and she is trying to say that the goth kids are throwing their support behind the winners.
I keep wondering if this is someone else who is pretending to be Malkin. I just can't understand why she would do it. It's so crazy; she can't think that portraying herself as the fantasy submissive Asian cheerleader of wingnut fantasy is going to be helpful to her career.
This seems like a genuinely disastrous idea. If it's really her.
I meant it with #15. I bet this was her husband's idea. I bet he's operating the camera.
10: AWB, that's simultaneously unsurprising and mind-blowing. Do you have a link?
It's her offbeat take on the Aristocrats.
"she can't think that portraying herself as the fantasy submissive Asian cheerleader of wingnut fantasy is going to be helpful to her career"
Why on earth not?
Can I say D/n B/ste yet?
She seems to hear herself saying this stupid, ridiculous thing, and then, like her husband, plow on anyway.
21: Apparently not, but I'll have a look for it when I get a chance. Thanks anyway.
23: You're supposed to start there and then move up. She was already in a higher position. I find it a little disquieting that she would make such a video; I'm going to find it really disturbing if it actually helps her career.
And no, don't bring him back.
OT - I'm covering another professor's class tomorrow. Reading over her notes, one of the examples involves a coin dropped off the World Trade Center. Weird!
24: Okay, I can see how that's one of those unthinking pat expressions that a person might use, but holy fuck, shouldn't she be more on guard against having a Marie Antoinette moment?
If you took that much Xanax, you'd have trouble being on guard against walking into walls.
30: Especially since Bush himself had the same MA moment already, when he said he really suffers seeing all these images on the TV screens or whatever.
29: Wouldn't this more properly be commented on on Crooked Timber.
Solved it! Malkin was inspired to greatness.
From the comments to the video:
Am I a loser for watching this so many times.
tomas on April 25, 2007 at 4:39 PM
Yes, actually.
NO REd-BLOODED WARBONER CAN WITHSTAND THIS VIDEO
Malkin's criticizing the Hollywood establishment for not sending more chanteuses over to entertain our boys in uniform. It's like her own little YouTube fueld USO.
38: I think she's criticizing them for not screening enough anime.
Holy crap I just realized: that skirt is from Holy Spirit High School. It's not a cheerleading outfit. It's her old CATHOLIC SCHOOL uniform.
That woman is twisted.
An incredibly sad basement-dwelling warblog enthusiast has gotten ahold of Aladdin's lamp; soon Nancy Pelosi will announce on CSPAN that she's a stupid moron with an ugly face and big butt and her butt smells and I she likes to kiss her own butt.
I can hardly wait for Howie Kurtz's next column about how mocking a serious pundit like Malkin shows that the Angry Left™ is sexist and racist.
40. The Catholic schoolgirl fantasy is completely different from the cheerleader fantasy. I'm sure Apo can send you some primary source material for reference.
As it turns out, Michelle is in the middle of a YouTube war stemming from OhayoCon '06 (she did the Project A-Ko theme in naval signal code) and the whole thing is a coded dis to B-Ko (Dennis Prager), but Jesse figured hey, save some time, edit in some Harry Reid and put it on Hot Air.
I feel like such a L-O-S-E-R. Because I honestly cannot think of a theory that doesn't boil down to, "She's stark raving mad."
An expert can integrate the cheerleader fantasy, the schoolgirl fantasy, the Asian fantasy, the dwarf fantasy, and the amputee fantasy all in one. You have trouble doing that with just one model, though.
47. Unless it's a snuff film.
47: [ REDACTED BECAUSE I REALLY SHOULDN'T GO THERE ]
Pfizer paid her to make the video because Viagra sales have been a little soft lately and they figured anyone who saw that would never get it up without drugs again. (Luckily for me, my work computer freezes after about two seconds of video; two seconds was more than enough.)
She lost a bet? Was there a Cosmo article? "Eighteen Ways to Drive your Wingnut Wild! (even if you're a liberal)"
SdB is already trawling the Internet for upskirt outtakes. AoS is lighting a cigarette, again. Derbyshire wishes she were younger and more boyish. All she needs to do is sing "Freaky like in Abu Ghraib", and maybe rub herself against a giant Cheeto. Thus are legends made.
When I saw that earlier today, my thoughts were, in this order:
1. What the hell?
2. Is... is this supposed to be either funny or sexy?
3. What an odd combination of "slutty"/prudish behavior.
4. Dammit, I don't want to feel bad for Michelle Malkin.
You guys laugh, but this is the next meme. When Saiselgy does his cheerleader vlog, it won't be so funny.
When Saiselgy does his cheerleader vlog, it won't be so funny.
Patently false.
She's fucking nuts. Next, the hair-shaving and marrying K-Fed.
54: Please don't tell us all the Crooked Timburglars and Obsidian Wingers are going to try their hand at "cheebrlogging" now.
47. Unless it's a snuff film.
[Sprays monitor with Mt. Dew-saliva mixture.]
Viagra sales have been a little soft lately
Brilliant!
Of course, if you experience a cheerleading routine lasting more than four hours, seek medical attention immediately.
"I'm Brad DeLong, and this is my morning C-O-F-F-E-E COFFEE!!"
*backflip*
wehttaM's P-U-T-I-N-I-Z-A-T-I-O-N routine will be memorable, indeed.
Dammit, the RSS feed was only up to 54, and I was going to leave a close analog of 55 which would note that it would be extremely funny.
w/d, was your close analogue agricultural in nature?
58: Me too. Wow. Just wow. Wow.
What about a diaclvlog between a beskirted Ann Althouse and a baton-weilding GFR?
Message: "The boys only listen to me because they think I'm cute."
That's all I got out of it.
68: The comments at the video support that impression.
52.4 nails it, yes. But 52.3 also offers valuable insight.
I need to go wash out my eyelids or something.
I win the thread with this comment. 51 and 54 are pretty fucking funny, though.
her voice indicated she was kind of self-conscious
that reduced my sexual desire a bit
The thing is, even if you really wanted to see a video of a cheerleader taunting the Democrats, this wouldn't be it. It really does fail on every conceivable level.
When Saiselgy does his cheerleader vlog
Please, it's "chvlog". Get it right.
"Eh. It's a job," said in a Flintstones-style animal voice is the only explanation that doesn't come down to "She's fucking nuts."
(Which doesn't mean she isn't fucking nuts.)
I am absolutely not having sex with Michelle Malkin, thankyouverymuch.
Youtube indicates that this is the #19-watched video of the day. So, if she wants publicity and doesn't care how she gets it, she's done a bang-up job.
She's a determined hard-core feminist, who is rightly sick and tired of repeatedly hearing women's good ideas dismissed by male fools saying "ah, that chick's not good looking so whatever she says is beneath consideration." So here is Ms. Malkin demonstrating that "pretty" is, in fact, not at all synonymous with "smart," or even "sane." Good jorb, Ms. Malkin, your point is taken!