Can you do famous philosophical taglines? e.g., God's a Dude; I'm Kinky, Therefore I Am, etc.
No, books only, B. If concepts counted, I'd have claimed summum bone'em.
The Subjection of Women VII: Barely Legal
Discourse on Method and Meditations on Fisting Philosophy
Foundations of the Metaphysics of Oral
On the Use and Abuse of My Cock, My Wife
Two Treatises of Civil Intercourse
Rameau's Nephew: We Totally Went at it After This Really Boring Conversation
Boethius' Consummations of Philosophy.
A Vindication of the Rights of Women to My Cock.
A Vindication of the Rights of Men to My Cock Too, While We're At It.
That was supposed to be Of Creammatology, but I suppose the other one works too.
Either I haven't read enough philosophy, or this works a lot better with movies.
Or, if it's not gay, Eight Men in Jerusalem.
The Literal Demeaning of Genesis. (Are porn names like stripper names? If so, there's all sorts of fun to be had.)
"Ether/Score" and "Of Crammatology" are my favorites so far, but LB gets points for scaring me a little with "Derriere Yum! Natura."
Dialicktits of Enlightenment by Max Fuckheimer and Theodor W. Aporno.
Meditations on First Fellatio
Discourse on Method and Meditations on Fisting Philosophy
The Laugh of the Medusa already kinda sounds like Anime tentacle porn, unfortunately.
Sticking with Agamben: The Cumming Community and, of course, I'm Open: Man and Animal.
The Structural Transformation of Her Pubic Sphere
Gender Trouble
You know, honestly, most feminist stuff doesn't really need tweaking to sound dirty.
K. Godel, The Consistency of the Bukkake Hypothesis
Damn it, I meant The Sexual Transformation of Her Pubic Sphere. 54 sounds more like Dead Ringers.
The Myth of Fisting Us
The Dick of Sisyphus
55: Same with Zizek. I mean, The Ticklish Subject or Enjoy Your Symptom! or The Plague of Fantasies or Organs Without Bodies write themselves. Of course, there's still Foucault: This Is Not Your Ordinary Pipe (In Tiny White Holes).
Über die Freiheit des Mens' Lickin' Willens
H. Putnam, The Threefold Cord: Mind, Body, and Bondage.
Darwin, Marx, Wagner: Critique of a Threesome
Nietzsche Underneath Wagner
"Fist, Friction and Foreskin" actually has some historical provenance.
(Ha! I [wned Wrongshore.)
Something similar to 66 could be done with Gödel, Escher, Bach: an Eternal Golden Braid. But what, I am not sure.
Zen and the Art of Analingus
De Constantia Potententiis (On The Firmness of The Potent). Also from Seneca (purportedly), The Pumpkinification of Claudius. Not quite sure what it means, though.
How To Do Things With Cucumbers
Whom Is To Be Done?
No more! 74's to be my high-note, so I'm out.
57: How about The consistency of the cum-till-your-numb hypothesis?
Obviously, I mean you're-numb. I'll go away now.
Enlightenment as Ass Reception, by Maxx Pork-him-or-her.
Climbing the Mountains
Making It REALLY Explicit
Unnatural Goodness
Entailment: The Logic of Getting Some Tail
On Liberty, exploiting the ambiguity between 'Liberty' naming a concept and 'Liberty' naming a person. Get it? Huh, huh?
Schopenhauer, The World as Thrill and Penetration.
in 91 I tried to do something with the name "Nuel Belnap" but was stymied.
92 would be much better as On Lady Liberty.
The World-Ass, Willing Repenetration.
?
Gödel, Escher, Bach: an Eternal Golden Shower
Gödel, Escher, Bach: an Eternal Golden Triad
The Fable of the Please; or, Private Vices, Publick Benefits
Is it possible to change "Mandeville" in a way which would make it more appropriate for this purposes? I assert not.
"An Eternal Golden Shower" is by far the funnier of Dr. Paisley's two.
101 -- It could be changed to "Mandingo".
Dude-Dog Massage Impairs His Jism.
Gongsun Longzi, The White Horse-Sex Dialogue.
Watsuji Tetsuro, Antics as the Study of Human Boning.
96 is pretty good.
The Breasts of Tragedy
Genealogy of Merkins
Boning, Good and Evil
Thus Pokes Zarathustra
The Will to Porn
Horny, All-Too-Horny
Thus Pokes Zarathustra and Horny, All-Too-Horny are funny.
Why, thank you. I'm very proud of the Zarathustra line.
The Conquest in Bed, by Pyotr Cockblockkin
Cuteness interruption: one of the papers I'm grading interprets the Donne lines from "The Flea" "Thou know'st that this cannot be said / A sin, or shame, or loss of maidenhead," as meaning that the girl he wants to sleep with is afraid of being beheaded as punishment for losing her virginity. I just wrote "Maidenhead means hymen" in the margins. Hope that helps.
How embarrassing! Good thing you nipped that in the bud, before the student wrote a senior thesis called The Loss of Maidenhead: Shari'a Honor Killing in the Work of John Donne.
They're willing to believe pretty much anything about the consequences of sex. Thanks, abstinence education!
Come to think of it, I don't understand the etymology. Why 'head'?
Like fountainhead, right? I'm not sure.
Intruding Scientific Postscript to Philosophical Panties.
I am not sure about this: "Middle English maidenhed, from maiden + -hed -hood; akin to Middle English -hod -hood"
Really, The Gay Science needs no gilding.
I dicked up a code in there. Help? [Done. LB]
When Bad Things Happen to Good Peepholes by ...
I was just very disappointed to discover that that's by Harold Kushner, not Martin Buber. Although I suppose
When Bad Things Happen to Good Peepholes by Hairy Cushioner
will do.
I should add, for those who'd like to joke, that Adorno's translator was named "John Cumming." Please, riff at will...
On Marvellous Things Fucked (considered spurious).
Fickenschaftlehre
Must we demean whom we fuck?
Engorgias
Do essays count? I'm fond of Austin's "Three Ways of Spilling Seed".
Dammit, my ideas for using Gorgias depended on, "Well, it sounds like gorgeous." That's much better.
The Thickness Unto Little Death.
And David Vell/man's lesbian romp, "What Good is a Willy?".
Um, should I have googleproofed "Nuel Belnap"?
Do we do that with any living person whose name has not been in Time Magazine?
Not to mention Cavell's oft-puzzled-over S&M treatise The Pain of Pleasin'.
I suppose it's no surprise that ben's really good at this game.
138: I was kinda disappointed that he wasn't around during the day for that very reason.
Then there are collections, like the W.H. Auden–edited The Living Cock of Kirk the Hard and Davidson's collected papers on homosexuality, Inquiries into Poofs and Penetration, and sexual/intellectual memoirs, like Davidson's of his lawless pubescence, "Developmental Events", and Cavell's of his sexuo-philosophical mentor, "Austin at Cliticism".
And Rorty's of the event that led him to come out of the closet, "The Girl Well Lost".
We pass over in silence the disappointing events that led Davidson to ask, somewhat petulantly, "How Is Weakness of Wang Possible?".
At Ass, Hugged
The Ass-Fluent Society
The General Theory of Employment of Interest In Manray
How To Tongue A Liberal (If You Must)
Harry Frankfurt's recent The Squeezin's of Love is pretty interesting.
I also liked Akeel Bilgrami's investigation into the psychopathology of the inveterate masturbator, Self-Knowledge and Resentment.
I think we're overlooking movies here. Who could forget Der Triumph des Wangens or Who the #$*! Have We (K)nown!?
We're not overlooking movies, we're explicitly ruling them out.
Twilight of the Realdolls, Or
How to philosophize with a hard-on.
Pro-Oedipus
De enima
Slightly off-topic: I once thought it would be funny to try to abuse my authority as a teacher to convince impressionable young students that while we Americans say it as "Kant," the real authentic German pronunciation is "Cunt." Maybe I'd say the "u" a little weird so that it wouldn't be so completely obvious.
It's still all about "Whom is to be done?" for me.
But may I submit...
Peter Slaughter Dyke, Critique of Cuntical Reason
Madness and Anal Penetration: A History of Sodomy in the Age of Reason
The Birth of the Clit: An Archaeology of Vaginal Reception
The Orifices of Things
The Archeology of Carnal Knowledge
Discipline and Punish: The Birth of My Erection
The History of Sexuality: A Seduction
The History of Sexuality, vol. II: The Abuse of Pleasure
The History of Sexuality, vol. III: My Share of Her Self
Society Must Be Rear-Ended
Fearless Queef
I have a feeling we're not confining ourselves exclusively to real philosophy texts at this point.
What a medicocre return. Surely there must be a field of inquiry better suited to porn-names?
160: typos are a fertile field. Perhaps your "medicocre" would look better as "meaty-cocker".
Thomas Browne's treatise on the prevalence of shemales in London, Pseudococksia Epidemica.
Y'all may not have noticed, but Davidson's [memoir] of his lawless pubescence,
, was genius.Developmental Events
Plat O-faces's The Sinposium
Harry Frankn'beans' On Hershit
Edmanned Burke's Reflections on the Lube in my Pants
I'm surprised no one's mentioned Pascal's great work, Penes.
Or Kant's Open Posterior, which is, I admit, a bit of a stretch.
Nancy Cartwright's early work How the Laws of Physics Got Me Laid continues to stimulate and provoke.
In a more speculative vein, we've got Girard's ode to things anal, Things Hidden in the Foundation of a Girl.
Edith Stein's On the Problem of Empathy was actually about why she had to give up being a dominatrix.
Discourse on the Rhythm Method
I can't believe nobody thought of 180 previously.
You're all biased in favor of Western thinking, Grasshopper.
Philosophy of Watersports
The Open Society and its Enemas (by Hot Karl Popper)
my aunt went on a date with Isiaiah Berlin and came back muttering about him taking three kinds of liberty.
Aw come on -- if you're punning around with titles, Kong Fuzi has got to ==> Confusion.
A Gland County Anal-crack by Alltoo Oftenpolled.
Anal Liberation
Should My Cock of Standing, by Fistinher Prone
Walter Benjamin's "The Jerk-Off Art in the Age of Mechanical Stimulation"
György Lukács' "History and Ass Consciousness"
Hegel's "Sigh, Hints of Large Dick"
#188: When I was in 5th grade, I honestly thought my Social Studies teacher had assigned me a report on "China and the Confusionists". She cracked up when I told her I couldn't find any books on them.
Nagel's The View from Down There
Whereas Graham Harman's "Tool Being" and Prauss's "Knowing and Doing" require no alteration.
Eric Hoffer's The true believer: thoughts on the nature of ass movements.
Purity of Cock is to Fuck One Thing
Group Sexology and the Anal Lysis of the Ego
The Libido of the Ancients Compared with that of the Moderns by Benjamin Constantly.
Alex Mill/er and Cris/pin Wri/ght's excellent collection of papers exploring the subtle connections between Kripke's Wittgenstein and BDSM sodomy: Rule-following and Reaming.
Let's not forget this passage from the Zhuangzhi, reproduced in Vell/man's paper on Frankfurt's "The Gay and the Wanton":
Porn star Ding was fucking a teen nympho for Director Wenhui. Wherever his finger fingered, wherever his cock leaned, wherever his fist pushed, wherever his tongue probed—with a zip! with a whoosh!—he handled his manhood with aplomb, and never skipped a beat. He moved in time to the Dance of the Mulberry Forest, and their moans harmonized with the Head of the Line Symphony. Director Wenhui said, "Ah, excellent, that technique can reach such heights!"
The porn star sheathed his chopper and responded, "What your servant values is the Way, which goes beyond technique. When I first began pounding tight teen pussy and ass, I did not see anything but teenage sluts. Three years later, I couldn't see the whole woman. And now, I encounter them with spirit and don't look with my eyes. Sensible knowledge stops and carnal desires proceed. I rely on the slatternly patterns, thrust in the big gaps, am guided by the large fissures, and follow what is inherently so. I never need any lubricant, much less do any difficult thrusting!"
That should be "Frankfurt,", not "Frankfurt's".
Wow. w-lfs-n wins, like, the whole universe.
It now seems anticlimactic to refer to Schlegel's essay on the rump of the greatest poet/dramatist/novelist/philosopher/scientist of his age, "On Goethe's Keister".
I can't believe you people are letting this thread die.
I can't think of any more quality works by Pyotr Cockblockkin.
The Presentation of Self in Everyday Life, by Boffman.
If we expand our remit to the literary, albeit still philosophical, we have Goethe's Fist.