Re: Boxes and Baggage

1

You could buy carbon offsets.

Does shipping things by UPS really require that much more energy than shipping things to stores? Clearly not in most of the country (where people drive the stores), but maybe slightly more in NYC (where you'd otherwise be walking). But UPS is fairly efficient with their routes -- I bet the difference isn't huge.

Packaging is another issue. Just be sure to recycle.


Posted by: Brock Landers | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:08 PM
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2

Just remind yourself that every time you buy something from UPS, you have to give your phone number to a wiry Teamster.


Posted by: snarkout | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:10 PM
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3

People have suggested that it is more eco-friendly to have UPS ship to your work address, where they are probably delivering packages anyway. I don't know if there is any way to actually crunch numbers on this, but it is a plausible enough idea that I have made it my policy.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:12 PM
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4

What Brock said: as a New Yorker, you might be better off carrying things home, but I'm pretty sure delivery is always going to be more energy efficient than a driving trip. So if your options are (1) do all your shopping yourself in a personal car (2) online shopping and UPS delivery, baby or (3) walk to the store and carry your stuff home, while (3) beats the other two, (2) beats (1).


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:13 PM
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(4) walk to the store and take a cab home as the less hassle, more cash compromise.

But I really think that in New York, the idea that a UPS driver is somehow going to burn an appreciable amount more gas to get to you is probably not accurate.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:17 PM
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6

Also, according to Dale Jamieson, people living in Manhattan already emit half the amount of greenhouse gases as other Americans.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:19 PM
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7

Is there anything carbon offsets doesn't solve? I'm getting kinda suspicious of them.


Posted by: Armsmasher | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:20 PM
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8

7: Sudoku.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:21 PM
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9

Carbon Offsets help me get the children dressed for school in the morning, while I make pancakes and eggs for the Mister.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:22 PM
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10

How guilty should I feel? What, if anything, can I do about this?

You should probably hang yourself. Try a short sheep shank.

The point to remember, in addition to the good advice above, is that the UPS truck isn't going out just to your address, but delivering all over the neighbourhood, which is a lot more marginally efficient - delivery routes are pretty well optimised these days. If you can't find anything worse than this to feel guilty about, you're doing OK.

What's the standard UPS packaging like? I doubt it's much worse than the store delivery packaging, but if significant parts of it are not recyclable, you should express your dissatisfaction as often as possible.


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:24 PM
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11

I use carbon offsets instead of the no-longer-available papal indulgences.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:25 PM
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12

(1) wreck your car, (2) fail to buy a new car


Posted by: text | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:27 PM
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13

If you want some environmental guilt, maybe you should focus on the purchase itself, and not the delivery method. Do you really need a new X? I'm not recommending environmental guilt per se, just trying to focus it efficiently.


Posted by: rob helpy-chalk | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:27 PM
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Becks omits to mention that these packages are being shipped to her summer home on Mount Desert Island, where the UPS men have to make an extra helicopter trip.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:28 PM
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Is there anything carbon offsets doesn't solve?

Anthropogenic climate change? Also, Gonerill wins the thread.


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:29 PM
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16

Buy online, but send all of your packaging materials to Paris Hilton so that she can make interesting crafts during her sojourn in prison. Or so that other prisoners can have somewhere to stash the body parts. Or use for tinder for the itch burning.

Seriously, PH has decided to invoke the power of the masses and is whoring for petition signers to ask Arnie to pardon her. Because "Paris Whitney Hilton is an American celebrity and socialite. She is an heiress to a share of the Hilton Hotel fortune, as well as to the real estate fortune of her father Richard Hilton. She provides hope for young people all over the U.S. and the world. She provides beauty and excitement to (most of) our otherwise mundane lives."

Why are you people worrying about global warming when THERE ARE MORE IMPORTANT ISSUES??!!!!


Posted by: DominEditrix | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:34 PM
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Were I Paris—and I say this as someone who also provides beauty and excitement to (most of) our otherwise mundane lives, so I can relate—I would rather serve a short jail stint than be in Schwarzenegger's debt.


Posted by: Armsmasher | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:36 PM
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Yesterday the "Send Paris to Jail" petition was beating out the "Pardon Paris" petition. I haven't been following it closely, obviously.


Posted by: Jackmormon | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:40 PM
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"She provides hope for young people all over the U.S. and the world"
What, the hope that some day they can grow up to have insanely wealthy parents too?
UPS drivers only turn right when possible, so they save more gas than normal drivers. Except in NYC you can't turn on red so they don't save as much as other places.


Posted by: SP | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:42 PM
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Barter.

Oh man, we've already threadjacked to Paris Hilton? Well, then.

Free Paris Hilton: 15,191 signatures.
Bill Frist's petition to support the President's veto: 9,512 signatures.


Posted by: neil | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:46 PM
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21

I too provide beauty and excitement to my otherwise mundane life.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:46 PM
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22

Whenever you buy something online, buy one of whatever you're buying for somebody else too. Me, for instance, unless it's women's clothing. That way the extra happiness you're adding to the world can offset any harm you're causing. Plus, since every purchase will be twice as expensive, you'll buy less.


Posted by: washerdreyer | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:46 PM
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23

the extra happiness you're adding to the world can offset any harm you're causing

Star Princess offsets! If heebie-geebie sends me a pic of her ass, she's permitted—no, obligated—to kidney-punch a senior citizen.


Posted by: Armsmasher | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:50 PM
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24

I think that jerking off about ten mice per package received should do it.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 1:53 PM
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25

package received ATM.


Posted by: washerdreyer | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 2:01 PM
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26

But I don't want to kidney-punch a senior. I want to have all this grading completed, though. How flexible is your offer?


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 2:04 PM
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27

I'll grade the papers for you. Tell me how many there are and I'll tell you what the grades are.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 2:06 PM
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28

Is this ethical, Uncle John? I don't want to be bad.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 2:08 PM
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29

You'll never go wrong trusting your Uncle John, young lady.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 2:09 PM
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30

Are we going to eat the funny mushrooms again, Unka John?


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 2:13 PM
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31

I need to see the pic if I'm going to be grading on the curve.


Posted by: Armsmasher | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 2:15 PM
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32

I learned in Ethics 101 that trust is a relational virtue. As such it can only occur in relationships, the existence of which violate the No-Relationship Policy.


Posted by: washerdreyer | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 2:16 PM
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33

The "on" in 31 is superfluous.


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 2:23 PM
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34

But HG can trust Unka John without Unka John violating his policy. You're not suggesting reciprocal trust, are you, Unka John?


Posted by: Nakku | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 2:25 PM
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35

Re: the shipping, it is my vague recollection that the BTUs wasted in overnight/2nd day air shipping are pretty substantial, compared to ground delivery. (Oh, here's a source. Reliability unknown.)

Moral: Don't pay for super-fast shipping, and don't accept it if it's offered as a freebie. But also: ground delivery by a delivery company is MORE efficient, especially in the city.

Another thing to do is to send e-mails to the vendors either praising or criticizing their streamlined/wasteful packaging. Few enough people bother to do this that it can make a difference.


Posted by: Witt | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 2:26 PM
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36

No, I think that I'll debunk the fraudulent patriarchal concepts of "inappropriate touching" and "red zones" the papeople have been using to keep you in bondage.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 2:26 PM
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37

10: How do you have yourself with a sheep shank? Otherwise, yeah, I second this'un.


Posted by: David | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 2:28 PM
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38

Hot red zone inappropriate papeople bondage! Now you're talking!


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 2:29 PM
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39

By changing your diet so you produce less methane, you can justify a lot of DedX deliveries.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 2:30 PM
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40

Seriously, PH has decided to invoke the power of the masses and is whoring for petition signers to ask Arnie to pardon her.

I'm willing to sign this petition for, say, $10,000. And I'll refrain from signing the "Send Paris to jail" petition for another $10,000.


Posted by: mcmc | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 2:31 PM
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41

The zombie-delivery company!


Posted by: Nakku | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 2:31 PM
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42

Send Paris Hilton to Gitmo for a "USO" show for the detainees. They'll confess to anything to make her go away.


Posted by: David | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 2:32 PM
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39: capturing MY methane would power a lot of curly bulbs.


Posted by: David | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 2:33 PM
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44

Gee, I only look at taxi fare vs. shipping cost. (Never sales tax vs. shipping cost, I promise!) I never thought about the boxes.

I do re-use plastic grocery bags on doggie doo-doo, though.


Posted by: Shamhat | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 3:34 PM
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45

2: Like this is a problem? UPS delivery guys are h0tt.


Posted by: Magpie | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 5:27 PM
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46

UPS truck drives by your house every day... stopping to deliver to you does not hurt the precious planet.


Posted by: John Hall | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 6:37 PM
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47

45 - I prefer my FedEx guy, who I haven't seen for ages. (Is it wrong to buy things simply for the delivery men?) Or my recently-acquired, rather attractive plumber (footballer's calves).


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 7:27 PM
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48

Not true John Hall.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 7:28 PM
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49

John Hall formerly of Hall and Oates and currently representing some district a little bit north of New York City?


Posted by: washerdreyer | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 7:36 PM
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50

23: heebie should be punching that oldster sometime soon.


Posted by: ben w-lfs-n | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 7:36 PM
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51

Congressman John Hall (that can't of been him. If it was, hi, and I gave your campaign money. Sue Kelly was too close to my personal space to be allowed to be a Republican in Congress.) isn't Hall and Oates, he's an entirely different 70s rock star. I don't know jack about music, so I've never heard of him.


Posted by: LizardBreath | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 8:26 PM
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52

John Hall. The band was "Orleans".


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 9:02 PM
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53

John Hall, Yacht Rep.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 9:04 PM
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54

47 -- the Polish plumber?


Posted by: Cryptic Ned | Link to this comment | 05- 9-07 9:23 PM
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Nah, he's not Polish. Although there are lots of Poles round here - did I mention a Polish plumber ever? I don't think I know any.


Posted by: asilon | Link to this comment | 05-10-07 3:20 AM
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51: LB, I'm sure you're familiar with the Orleans song, "Still the One." Every local TV station in America has used it for an ad at one point or another.

You're still the one who can scratch my itch
Still the one and I wouldn't switch
We're still having fun, and you're still the one
et cetera et cetera.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 05-10-07 5:57 AM
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George W Bush was using an Orleans song in his campaign. Hall asked him not to.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 05-10-07 6:16 AM
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50: Now that I've seen, it's clear you should be kicking and stomping old people's kidneys.


Posted by: Armsmasher | Link to this comment | 05-10-07 7:48 AM
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59

Is it wrong to buy things simply for the delivery men?

Yes, but it's not wrong to pick one service over another based on the h0ttness of your local driver.


Posted by: Magpie | Link to this comment | 05-10-07 11:44 AM
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