That's one ugly dog! [meant in the most collegial, friendly way possible, mind you]
She does, doesn't she. I couldn't get her most characteristic facial expression, in which she's clearly trying to convince you to buy either a used car or some penny stocks.
The union stuff is one thing, but this, this is a new low for the blog. Unfogged is a dog-hating blog!
You may say that, but it appears to me that DogBreath is the very face of Unfogged.
I suppose you're right. There's no disjunction around here between "being x" and "hating x."
3: My dad's dog has similarly wonderful eyebrows and ears. He has a range of expressions that includes "Don't touch that; I will kill you," "I have something important to insert into this conversation if you would only shut up," "It's a good thing I'm funny, because otherwise you'd beat me senseless," and "I hate to ask, but there's this thing I really need you to do for me in the other room that requires opposable thumbs."
6: Nah, 9½. We got her immediately after getting married, to figure out if we could manage kids, and as help with herding them.
See, I've never understood that. What if it turns out that you have enough mojo to manage a single kid, but not a kid and a dog?
Oh, I think it's objectively a terrible plan, but it is what we did. She bites the kids (and us) frequently, but not hard.
Hey, you know what's decidedly suboptimal? Going to the ATM to get some cash because you don't have any and having it refuse to complete any transactions (including balance inquiries), then calling the customer service line to see what's up and being told that your card was deactivated two weeks ago because your account was nearly $400 overdrawn and even though there's now plenty of money in the account you have to go in and talk to the bank people in person to get the card reactivated, but you can't because it's Sunday and all the branches are closed.
That is suboptimal indeed.
14: "Some people have problem X, so they think, hey, I'll do Y. Now they have two problems."
15: Yeah, and what do you do with the dog when it isn't a Sunday and they don't allow dogs in the branch office? At least the kids are allowed into the branch, but the then dog's herding role becomes infeasible and generally frowned-upon by society.
You just leave the kids outside with the dog while you go in. Simple as that.
My female Carolina caught an armadillo Friday. After waving it triumphantly in front of her brother, she dropped it on command, whereupon said diller scampered away. I did not check the diller for damage, believing that leprosy would be a painless but embarrassing form of suicide.
The lady said:"It was a baby diller, wasn't it?" Hah. Lucky for the grizzleys I don't live in Montana.
I am not back, just an occasional haunt, hoping to instill guilt in dog-hating Persians.
dogbreath would appear to be, on cursory inspection, a Good Dog. My folks' dogs would, presented with a cellphone or other picture taking implement, get freaked out and attack each other. This beast obviously trusts its owner with the strange flashy device, but still looks concerned.
She is pretty skuzzy looking for an attractive dog. Definitely in the "attractive because she's gettable" category. What's her ass look like?
Normally I'd think that 24 is really funny, but then there's that rule against B being funny.
Ogged and I have traded roles, just for the hell of it.
24: Moderately ridiculous. It's extremely, but extremely fluffy, to the point of looking rather as if she's wearing fuzzy bloomers. And she has no tail. (Well, a two inch stump that gets lost in the fuzz.)
It's extremely, but extremely fluffy, to the point of looking rather as if she's wearing fuzzy bloomers.
Dude, you've got one weird looking dog.
Passers-by on the street have referred to her as: "That's some hyena looking shit there." I think she's lovely.
I think she's lovely
Then it is a match made in heaven. She bites you and your kids and gets ridiculed by people on the street and you love her for it. That's one lucky dog.
Having seen her picture, I think I've lost my appetite anyway.
That is the dog of someone who loves her dog as is without making a lot of status demands. That is the comfy sweatpants of canines. I love her on sight.
Judging just from the photo, she looks very doggy. No fancy stuff. "My kind have evolved to live among you, but we are not you. I don't understand what you mean by this 'pure-bred' nonsense. I am not a fashion accessory. I am a dog -- deal with it." Thanks for sharing, LB.
"That's some hyena looking shit there."
I think they meant jackal. But jackal in a cute way.
That dog looks like it was painted by Van Gogh.
24: Perfect Ogged channeling, for which I send props.
Meanwhile, my actual bitch -- let's call her w-lfs-n, for want of anything better -- cowers in the corner. She's a beautiful cross between a pointer and a springer spaniel, and she might be the stupidest creature ever to have drawn breath. And she cowers because she's upset that I shouted at her for chasing reflections again -- something that should have grown old when she was, say, 20 in dog years.
The other name we have for DogBreath over the years is Diversity Dawg, since just about every damned color you can think of is on her. A pup born from an explosion in a paint factory.
When she was a pup, she looked like a baby raccoon--the spots were the same size, but her face was a lot smaller--and I used to carry her around in my anorak pocket.
She is an excellent guard dog, she loves her pack, she won't eat any table scraps that are not home-cooked food, and she is always happy to see me again on my return on the few occasions that I leave the house without her.
I do suspect her of logging into my Smith Barney account and siphoning off my 401k for a little den somewhere in the mountains between France and Spain, which is the land of her people.
And because I share my gristle with her, she might even let me visit when Social Security finally caves in.
France and Spain? I was guessing that Dog Breath has a fairly big chunk of Australian Shepherd somewhere in her background.
Australian Shepherds aren't actually from Australia.
From that wikipedia article:
For many centuries, shepherds had more interest in dogs who performed well when helping to manage flocks of sheep than they had in the specific appearance of the dogs.
Yeah, no shit.