Re: That's It, I'm Moving To Canada

1

This just bloody stupid.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:24 AM
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What really makes this unfair is that there's no way for a competitor to Kerrigan him.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:24 AM
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"Pistonius". Ha.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:25 AM
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4

Stuff White People Like: using machines to cheat!


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:25 AM
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5

Anti-cyborgist.


Posted by: strasmangelo jones | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:28 AM
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2: land mines?


Posted by: ajay | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:31 AM
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I'm Moving To Canada

Go for it. I hear that it's a real laugh riot up there.
(We're just marking time waiting for bp to show up.)


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:34 AM
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5: Anti-cyborgist.

Yes, one small step for a man, one giant leap towards the singularity.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:36 AM
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5: that hurts, stras, it really does.

I'm on the record as arguing that there totally should be a cyborg racing league, that healthy athletes must amputate limbs to enter.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:36 AM
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10

It turns out my law firm is the one whose been helping him, the whole firm got an e-mail today talking about what great news it was.


Posted by: pair of household appliances | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:37 AM
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11

"whose" s/b "that has"


Posted by: pair of household appliances | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:38 AM
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12

Lawyers helping cheaters? Shock!


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:39 AM
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13

Toldja.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:42 AM
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14

Told us that it would get overturned?


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:42 AM
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15

Told you he should be allowed to compete.

Face it, Heebie: this time I'm right.


Posted by: bitchphd | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:43 AM
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16

15 is wrong.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:43 AM
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17

Heebie is right, though.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:44 AM
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18

I still don't think he should be allowed to compete in this particular event. Which I told, too.


Posted by: heebie-geebie | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:45 AM
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19

After he wins a race, I bet he'll be able to do a wicked flip.


Posted by: asl | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:45 AM
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20

I plan on competing as well, in my solid gold rocket car.


Posted by: norbizness | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:45 AM
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21

Hooray! Also, post title for the win.


Posted by: m. leblanc | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:47 AM
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i think it's great news, what cheating
if i were legless i would be closer to depressed and die then to competing in the Olympics, what a great spirits
it must be really painful to learn to walk or run on that devices also
my boss back home she had her knee joints replaced, and according to her the rehabilitation was really really painful, it's very hard to learn how to walk again


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:47 AM
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-a, coz plurals


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:49 AM
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Sitting on the couch, the dumb thread thinks it would be neat to run around on "blades". In the distance she hears the sound of an approaching train.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:49 AM
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Face it, Heebie: this time I'm right.

B's criterion for judging rightness is whether a governing body says so. We'll be revisiting this criterion wrt Supreme Court and state legislature decisions shortly.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:50 AM
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than and those


Posted by: read | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:51 AM
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27

I haven't read it yet, and the .pdf loaded really slowly for me, but here's a report of their decision.


Posted by: washerdreyer | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:52 AM
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That comment was a clusterfuck in so many ways. The opinion.


Posted by: washerdreyer | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:53 AM
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Interesting NYT visuals from last year on the aspects of his prosthetics. It says his "hips must generate almost twice the energy of an able-bodied sprinter," and that the springs store up less energy through compression than regular legs do.

Concomitantly, the NYT article from then says the justification for his disqualification was that the prosthetics were more efficient in certain specified situations, and his complaint was the testing didn't examine the "overall net advantage or disadvantage."

My instincts are against it, like everyone's, but objectively, it could really be the case that adding up pros and cons, he would be competing equally.


Posted by: Minivet | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:57 AM
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So, I don't remember all the details of the previous thread, and I'm hardly going to go back and review it now, but what is the pro-cyborg position on enhancements to the prosthesis? We've seen a lot of innovation in prosthetics in the last several years, so by 2012, there could very well be some technology that allows for say, 20% better performance, couldn't there be? Should the CAS and other governing bodies just keep signing off on better and better false legs? Also, does he walk around on the same prostheses that he competes on? If one of the prostheses malfunctions during the Olympics, can he just put on a spare? I would be more interested in the answers to these questions, except that I don't really care for sport.


Posted by: minneapolitan | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 11:58 AM
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it could really be the case that adding up pros and cons, he would be competing equally

It almost doesn't matter whether he's competing equally or not. There's no way to tell, for one thing; and for another, it's hard to know what "equally" means when the mechanics are so different. I could be racing in norbizness' solid gold rocket car -- but with parachutes put on it for drag, which would cancel out the advantage of the gasoline powered motor. But no one would let me, because that would be stupid.


Posted by: jms | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 12:02 PM
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32

Today is the day for recycling old threads! Makes sense. The background of this blog is white, white people love recycling.


Posted by: m. leblanc | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 12:09 PM
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33

Today really is rehash day on unfogged, isn't it?


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 12:10 PM
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34

32 kind of figures.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 12:11 PM
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35

White people love repeating Arab chicks' comments as if they'd thought them up themselves.


Posted by: apostropher | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 12:12 PM
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36

NASCAR, for instance, is very specific about the mechanical specifications that its athletes must adhere to.


Posted by: politicalfootball | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 12:14 PM
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35: Not as much as they loving pointing out the commenting foibles of others.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 12:15 PM
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33 was not pwned, and not plagiarized. It was an effort to stay with the theme of the day.


Posted by: politicalfootball | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 12:16 PM
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39

17 + 18 is beautiful.

Siufu, did you really recall that Heebie was a fellow cyborgist?

I don't think I have the requisite commenter-recall to really fit in here.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 12:16 PM
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Hey man, I'm white as they come, culturally speaking.

Although I have several times gotten into arguments with my boyfriend about whether there is such a thing as white "culture." Sigh.


Posted by: m. leblanc | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 12:16 PM
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41

39: The only thing you need to remember about heebie is that she's right.


Posted by: politicalfootball | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 12:18 PM
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42

He should be sure to upgrade to a wheeled model before the Games.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 12:36 PM
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42: More likely, an upgraded spring. Dude is doing something impressive, no doubt, but from the coverage it seems that the standard is 'no mechanical advantage beyond doubt' rather than 'is this guy still doing the same sport.' I.e., the IAAF picked the wrong argument.

I feel bad for the guy who he'll replace on the relay team.


Posted by: Cala | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 12:44 PM
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re: 43

Is right. There are so many things wrong with their whole position.

As has already been mentioned, why should we care if he has a mechanical advantage now?


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 12:47 PM
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Bullshit. I wanna blade runner guy go, and it will be cool and all you sports purists are full of it.

FACT: NASCAR, as #36 points out, has loads of mechanical specifications to stop anyone getting a technical advantage. It is shit. Formula One is better, and would be even better if it allowed turbos and anti-slip.

FACT: Fundamentally, these blade things are basically just a form of shoes. Everyone should be allowed to wear them. If everyone did, it would obviously be game over for blade runner guy once his learning-how-to-blade-run advantage had worn off, but so what. Then you sports purists could have a "special bare feet test of athletic ability" and nobody would care.

FACT: fuck off.

thank you.


Posted by: dsquared | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 1:10 PM
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dsquared I am deeply sad you don't see the value in my CYBORG RACING LEAGUE where all manner of mechanical contrivances are welcomed. Leave traditional track -- that ossified relic -- behind, and embrace the glorious future of all-cyborg all the time.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 1:12 PM
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(note that there is a general schema here: whatever arguments you purists come up with I am just going to say "FACT: Blade runner guy is cool" and you cannot deny that so you lose).


Posted by: dsquared | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 1:12 PM
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Fundamentally, these blade things are basically just a form of shoes.

This is also true of inline skates. I think distance runners should be allowed to wear them, as well.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 1:14 PM
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49

I think distance runners should be allowed to wear them, as well.

But only for cross country.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 1:15 PM
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50

You're thinking small, Gonerill.


Posted by: Beefo Meaty | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 1:16 PM
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51

But only for cross country.

No, for cross-country they should be allowed to use quad-bikes.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 1:19 PM
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52

But only for cross country.

Deal.


Posted by: Matt F | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 1:22 PM
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53

Hang on, hang on.

This guy's name is Pistonius? PISTONIUS?

That's his actual, real name?


Posted by: DS | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 1:23 PM
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54

Yes. His sister's name is Springy.


Posted by: Gonerill | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 1:24 PM
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55

This guy's name is Pistonius? PISTONIUS?

No. It's "Pistorius." OTOH, Unfogged is the top result already for "Oscar Pistonius."


Posted by: SomeCallMeTim | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 1:25 PM
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52: Exactly.


Posted by: soup biscuit | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 1:26 PM
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This is clearly ogged's great love of Harry Potter coming through--he meant to write "Oscar Patronius".


Posted by: Merganser | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 1:41 PM
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58

Thing is, at 21 he's young enough that spring technology could concievably improve throughout his running carreer such that he goes from being a guy who can barely qualify for the 400m to a guy who breaks Michael Johnson's world record.

Also, I know I'm going to hell for this but:

"These have always been my legs," he told Jere Longman in a Times profile last year. "I train harder than other guys, eat better, sleep better and wake up thinking about athletics. I think that's probably why I'm a bit of an exception."

is clearly bullshit.


Posted by: WillieStyle | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 2:39 PM
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58: Well, he's competing against a lot of guys with natural athletic ability. Pastorius is more of a scrapper, if you will. He's not afraid to get his tracksuit dirty. Unlike some of his flashier opponents.


Posted by: JRoth | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 3:02 PM
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59: Right, he's the Lenny Dykstra of track and field.


Posted by: JP Stormcrow | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 4:10 PM
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FACT: Blade runner guy is cool, you cunts.


Posted by: dsquared | Link to this comment | 05-16-08 4:12 PM
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Then you sports purists could have a "special bare feet test of athletic ability" and nobody would care.

Except, we can empirically test this one, given that the Olympics approximates a "special bare feet test of athletic ability" reasonably well, and lots of people care.

After all, the Olympic 100m sprint is one of the most prestigious sporting events, full stop. It's up there with the Tour de France, the World Cup, etc.

People do care about purity. We're not all Corinthians, but still.


Posted by: Keir | Link to this comment | 05-17-08 12:09 AM
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Yes and the pony carriage racing was pretty damn prestigious but then someone invented the car, and now it is a geek sport, same as flat-footed only-some-steroids 100m will be when my views prevail and chemical supermen are tearing down the track on 8ft blades.

People do care about purity

Nazi.

FACT: Blade runner guy is cool.


Posted by: dsquared | Link to this comment | 05-17-08 5:38 AM
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I don't think anyone is denying the coolness of the blade-running thing. I'd watch cyber-sprinting with guys on 8-foot blades, too.

But, no-one should kid themselves that it's the same sport. No more than we'd be happy with internal combustion-engined cars racing against pony-carriages.


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 05-17-08 5:55 AM
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No more than we'd be happy with internal combustion-engined cars racing against pony-carriages.

Although, saying that, if we add in spinning blades and mounted archers, and blokes with flame-throwers ...


Posted by: nattarGcM ttaM | Link to this comment | 05-17-08 5:56 AM
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Yes indeed, and the technical regulations for a formula one car run to several pages, and any car that falls outside them is fucking disqualified.

Look, of course the blade runner guy is cool. That's not in dispute. Like somebody upthread says, there should be a no holds barred category where he and the steroid freaks can merrily go head to head. But the fact remains that if you went to a wine tasting and were happily sipping a good Lafitte, and somebody came in with a bottle of Lagavulin and started explaining how it would get you drunk much quicker, you'd be the first to tell them to piss off.


Posted by: OneFatEnglishman | Link to this comment | 05-17-08 6:02 AM
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No more than we'd be happy with internal combustion-engined cars racing against pony-carriages.

I would be perfectly happy to see that, but I would guess that in the long term the pony carriage guys would get the message that history had passed them by.

66: I have written at length in the early days of my blog that those tech spec rules are for shit and against the true spirit of F1.

Basically I disagree that running 100 metres is a "sport" in the same way as football or cricket. There are no subtleties to appreciate or whatever - how many people in the world really admire the beautiful running style of some fucker who comes in last? It's a straightforward contest of who can run 100m in a straight line the fastest. So it would be more like me trying to make comparisons of which supermarket lager would get me pised the fastest and some bugger tugging my sleeve claiming that Tennents' Extra can't be allowed to count because it isn't brewed according to the Reinheitsgebot.


Posted by: dsquared | Link to this comment | 05-17-08 7:41 AM
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Not having the subtleties of cricket is a feature, not a bug. If I were interested cricketer-type subtleties I'd probably take up crocheting or collect fine china or something. It's equally exciting and you can talk just as fussily.

With all due respect to Samuel Beckett.


Posted by: John Emerson | Link to this comment | 05-17-08 8:06 AM
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For the record, blade runner dude runs the 400m not the 100m. I'm kinda impressed he can start from the blocks though.


Posted by: WillieStyle | Link to this comment | 05-17-08 11:19 AM
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